Marriage
is a
three
ring
circus:
an
engagement
ring, a
wedding
ring,
and
suffering
How Dogs
and
Women
are
alike.....
Neither
believe
that
silence
is
golden.
Neither
can
balance
a
checkbook.
Both put
too much
value on
kissing.
Marriage
is the
process
of
finding
out what
kind of
man your
wife
would
have
preferred.
If you
jogged
backward
...
would
you gain
weight?
Did you
hear
about
the new
Chinese
Cookbook
being
sold
only at
pet
stores?
"101
Ways to
Wok Your
Dog".
If you
can't
change
your
mind,
are you
sure you
still
have
one?
Did you
ever
walk
into a
room and
and
forget
why you
walked
in?
that's
how dogs
spend
their
lives.
I'm not
into
working
out. My
philosophy:
No pain.
No pain.
I only
use de-oudourant
under
one arm,
so I
know
what I
would
have
smelled
of.
A woman
walked
into a
fancy
cocktail
bar and
asked
the
barman
for a
"double
entendre"
- so he
gave her
one!
Four
fonts
walk
into a
bar. The
barman
says "Oi
- get
out! We
don't
want
your
type in
here"
A
priest,
a rabbi
and a
vicar
walk
into a
bar. The
barman
says,
"Is this
some
kind of
joke?"
A
sandwich
walks
into a
bar. The
barman
says
"Sorry
we don't
serve
food in
here"
Lights
on, door
open,
nobody
at home
As
confused
as a
hungry
baby in
a
topless
bar.
He's as
bent as
a
butchers
hook
He's as
happy as
a Pig in
$hit
About as
welcome
as a
fart in
a
telephone
box
☻If
you
would
see
yourself
the way
I do,
you
would
wish you
where as
beautiful
as you
... |
|
☻The
moment I
first
saw you,
you
warmed
my
heart,
the
second
time you
made
little
flames
and now
you make
my heart
burn
like
hell ! |
|
☻Are
you free
for the
rest of
your
life? |
|
☻I
know
milk it
does a
body
good,
but DAMN
how much
have you
been
drinking? |
|
☻If
I could
rewrite
the
alphabet
I'd put
U and I
together! |
|
☻Hello,
I'm a
thief
and I'm
here to
steal
your
heart! |
|
☻Your
daddy
must be
a
terrorist
because
you are
DA BOMB! |
|
☻Do
you
believe
in love
at first
sight,
or do I
have to
walk by
again? |
|
☻It
must
have
been a
rainy
day when
you were
born..Heaven
was
crying 'cus
it lost
its most
beautiful
angel! |
|
☻I
must
have
been
born
under a
lucky
star, to
find a
friend
as nice
as you
are, and
I will
follow
the
rainbow
until
the end,
if you
promis
forever
to be my
friend! |
|
☻If
love is
a crime,
lock me
up, i'm
guilty
baby |
|
☻In
my
dreams
you're
mine, in
my life
you're a
dream. |
|
☻Girls
are like
internet
domain
names...
the ones
I like
are
already
taken. |
|
☻God
created
the
world in
SIX days
But took
him
centuries...
to come
up with
someone...as
"HOT"
... as
"SEXY"
... as
"Fuckable"
...
*..As
"YOU!"
.. * |
|
☻Just
to let
you know
that I
went to
heaven
and
back... |
|
☻Oh
right
then!
Straight
to the
point! I
want you
right
here,
right
now! |
|
☻It
is deaf and it wants to
have sex with
you......................
What do you say?
☻Do
you know that you would
look great with two
pounds less ... in my
opinion those clothes
weigh exactly two pounds
!
☻You
are just like a Bounty
... a piece of paradise
on earth!
☻You're
eyes are soft en
tender,as sweet as they
can be.There's one thing
you must remember, you
are the one for me!!!
☻There
are so many people in
the world but in my
world there's only one
and that's you!!!
☻I
want to share everything
with you, your sadness,
your happy moments,
every single second of
the day.
☻Do
your feet never hurt
???? ... You are
wondering around my
thoughts all day
long....
☻Love
is in the air... shit if
only I had a plane right
now ...
☻When
the night comes, look at
the sky. If you see a
falling star, don't
wonder why,just make a
wish. Trust me it will
come true,'cause I did
it and I found you.
☻I
do not think much, I do
not think often, but
when I do think, I think
of you
☻I
love all the stars in
the sky, but they are
nothing compared to the
ones in your eyes!
☻You
can fall from a
mountain,you can fall
from a tree,but the best
way to fall,is to fall
in love with me.
☻If
flowers were dreams that
would last for ever, I
would pick the most
beautiful ones to send
to you
☻Be
smart, be clever, put me
in your heart, 4-ever.
☻Don't
listen to your mind.
Listen always to your
heart!
☻If
one night a big fat man
jumps in at your window
grabs you and puts you
in a sack don't worry I
told Santa I wanted you
for CHRISTMAS
☻If
I had a penny every time
I thought of you, I'd
still miss you,but at
least I would be rich!
☻Passion
running trough my veins,
trembling, waiting,
reason is fading.
Overpowering desire sets
my skin on fire!
☻Somewhere,
someone dreams of your
smile and finds your
presence in life so
worth while. So when you
are lonely, remember
it's true that someone,
somewhere, is thinking
of you.
☻Can
you see me? no? Turn
around, can you see me
now? no? Turn again, can
you see me now? I can
see you because you have
a special place in my
heart!
☻If
I was a fly, I would fly
to you now... but I'm
not so I need to stay
home and cry!
☻Since
I met you people are
wonders and live is a
big party...
☻What
ever you say, what ever
you do, I will always
love you
☻If
loving you is wrong,then
I don't wanna be
right.My love for you is
strong and brighter than
any light.The way we
must go is long,but
we'll win every fight.
☻At
night I cannot sleep and
during the day I dream
of you...
☻Life
is much brighter with
you around !
☻Don't
let your mind rule over
your heart.
☻You
can fall from a
mountain,you can fall
from a tree ... but the
best way is to fall in
love with ME
☻If
you would see yourself
the way I do, you would
wish you where as
beautiful as you ...
☻Sometimes
words are hard to find,
to form that perfect
line to let you know
you're always on my
mind!
☻Even
when it is rainy the sun
is shining in your
smile.
☻If
a kiss on your lips
tastes as sweat as a
raindrop I want it to
rain for ever .......
☻I
will give you one kiss
to go to sleep. I give
you two kisses to dream.
I give you an endless
row of kisses to, when
you wake up in the
morning, think of me.
☻It
must have been a rainy
day when you were born,
but it wasn't really
rain, the sky was crying
because it lost his most
beautifull angel...!
☻The
moment I first saw you,
you warmed my heart, the
second time you made
little flames and now
you make my heart burn
like hell !
☻Where
ever you're going, I'm
going your way !
☻Are
you free for the rest of
your life?
☻If
all the boys lived on
the other side of the
sea, what a good swimmer
I would be ?
☻During
maths I was thinking of
you but I cannot
calculate how much I
love you!!
☻I
am sending you to an
island full of kisses on
a sea of love!
☻Love
is...looking whether he
is looking, and when he
does, certainly not
looking back!!
☻Do
you have a coin? I want
to call your parents to
thank them.
☻I
wanted to put something
incredibly beautiful,
sweet, nice, sensitive,
erotic and funny on you
screen, but
unfortunately I do not
fit on it.
☻I
cannot think of a good
opening sentence, so
will we just say
good-bye ???
☻I
know milk it does a body
good, but DAMN how much
have you been drinking?
☻If
I could rewrite the
alphabet I'd put U and I
together!
☻Hello,
I'm a thief and I'm here
to steal your heart!
☻Your
daddy must be a
terrorist 'cus you're DA
BOMB!
☻Do
you believe in love at
first sight, or do I
have to walk by again?
☻I
must have been born
under a lucky star, to
find a friend as nice as
you are, and I will
follow the rainbow until
the end, if you promise
forever to be my friend!
☻Ferrari's
are red, Lambo's are
blue... but I am as
happy in a mini with
you.
☻Every
man dreams of a
beautiful woman, so do I
... I dream of you.
☻If
love is a crime, lock me
up, i'm guilty baby
☻If
God would have created
something more beautiful
than you he would have
kept it to himself.
☻Can
I have your picture, so
Santa Claus knows
exactly what to give me
.
☻In
my dreams you're mine,
in my life you're a
dream.
☻Girls
are like internet domain
names... the ones I like
are already taken.
☻Have
you drilled the
butterflies in your
stomach gedresseerd? I
haven't!
☻I
saw you at a distance
but you never
approached, but that
what did never happen,
never passes!
☻If
love is blind, how will
she find me ?
☻Never
make love in the garden
or in the fields......
For love might be blind
but your neighbours not!
☻The
less you open up to
others, the more you
will suffer.
☻Whenever
I see your smiling face,
I have to smile myself,
because I like you,
you're my friend!!!
☻There
is a clown in my heart.
Small and very special,
he can dance and jump,
laugh and sing ... are
you sad and crying, you
can borrow him.
☻I
love the spring
mornings, the afternoons
in autumn, the winter
evenings and the summer
nights....but you I love
more !
☻I
would have answered your
letter soonerb but you
did not write me one.
☻I
think i should tell
you what people are
saying behind your
back.……. Nice
Ass!!!!!!!
☻I
wish I was a teddy
bear, that lay upon
your bed, so
everytime you
cuddled it, you
cuddled me instead
☻Luv
is a sensation dat
is caused by
temptation.a boy
puts his location in
a girls
destination.do u get
my explanation or do
u wanna
demonstration?
☻I
like your style- I
like your class- but
most of all i like
your arse!
Do you like maths?if
so add a bed
subtract ur clothes
divide your legs and
we can multiply!
☻I
want triplets You
want twins.Lets get
in bed and see who
wins!
☻Of
all the babes ur my
selection.please
dont giv me a
rejection.my teeth
are clean for ur
Inspection so giv my
mouth a tongue
injection!
☻If
your right leg was
thanksgiving and
Your left leg was
Christmas could I
meet U between the
holidays?
|
☻Handsome,
Sweet,
Intelligent,
spontaneous,
good-looking,
nice
friends,
charming,
funny,
well...Enough
about ME!
How about
you? |
|
☻If
I could
rearrange
the
alphabet, Id
put U and I
together. |
|
☻What
is live ?
Live is
love. Whats
love ? Love
is kissing.
Whats
kissing ?
Come here
and I show
you. |
|
☻Love
me or leave
me.
Hey,where is
everybody
going ? |
|
☻Love
is Sweet,
Love is sad,
but with me
in bed Love
is the best
thing you
ever had. |
|
☻You
got the
style. You
got the
intelligence
and you sure
got the
body! |
|
☻Are
you a mum? I
am not a
dad! Maybe
you could
help me with
that! |
|