"We can't jump off the bridge and kill ourselves - you don't know how to swim!"
"Boy, chicken's the last thing I'd want to eat tonight."
"Okay, then we'll just have left-overs."
"Hey, yeah! There's that left-over chicken I can warm up!" - My parents
"Baby gooses look like goose poop. You know - have you ever been on a soccer field where there's all that goose poop? It kind of looks like little bales of hay... But baby geese don't really look like bales of hay, so I don't know what."
"What people?"
"That duck..."
"You guys should play some of the ones you haven't played yet."
"We did!"
"Our marriage almost didn't survive the Bach double." - Mr. Karanen
"A kid got electrocuted and they don't know how it happened."
"Well maybe he spontaneously combusted."
"People don't spontaneously combust."
"Well ya never know - maybe he had some sort of electricity in his body and then he farted."
"What?!"
"You know, like if he had some sort of chemical reaction in his body that made electricity - like an electric eel! And he farted!"
"A human electric eel farting!"
"Yeah!"
"Eels have special cells to make the electricity - people don't have them."
"Well what if he had cancer? Cancer cells could be mutated like that to make electricity! Or... there's electricity in your brain! What if he had a hole in his brain and his head was really near his butt and he farted?! Then he could spontaneously combust!"
"He didn't even spontaneously combust! He was electrocuted!"
"Why do I smell dead ladybugs?" - Mr. Modlin in the middle of a lecture in engineering |
