"I don't believe the good things in life should have to come with a price
They should come easily or at least the implication is nice
All alone in the night lost in the endless sky
Escaping history, some things belong in mysteries"
-Christian Wilson "Morning Comes"

Last time I wrote it was almost Thanksgiving. I was fortunate enough to have a great and short tour on the day of thanks so I was able to attend the Thanksgiving dinner occurring at my house. Happiness. We had an intimate group of good friends come by and share the holiday with us. We knew most of our friends would be celebrating with their family, however we have a very open door policy to anyone who is orphaned like us on the actual holiday. Jacob (our neighbor), Robbie Clay and Cathy Lee, Jennie, Julie and myself enjoyed a feast made by none other than our Chef Jennie. It was delish. Jennie's turkey was better than I think I've ever had. No offense momma, but Jennie studies and lives by the Food Network. Ha!

The following day, I had an expected tour of 26 people. It was only suppose to be 10. Kinda threw us for a shock, however we recovered and was able to do the tour with additional tour guides. It went really well, surprisingly enough and the group turned out to be pretty amazing people after the confusion and randomness of them all at the beginning. Once we got the message across that if we are gonna do this, we are gonna do this together and we need to all stay together, otherwise this won't work as efficient as it could. They got the message and rocked it! Of course, it would not have been as successful without the amazing Irvine and Tom F-O-X. My amazing co-tour guides!

Saturday was my happy moment. Every time I have any day where I'm kinda tired or not really in the "mood" to do a tour, I always go to my happy moment in my mind and it makes me smile. My happy moment came back. Three consecutive years, same day, same bat channel. *grin* I was fortunate again to host this family and make additional magical moments for them and for me. Hard to explain, but they are just such amazing people that it makes my day just as great! I had a blast. Whenever they come, it's my first experience of the year to watch the Osborne's Spectacle of Dancin Lights, which always gets me into the Christmas mood hardcore. This year we were also able to experience Illuminations:Reflections of Earth for the first time together. Also, we squeezed in a bit of the Spectro Magic Parade at MK and finally got to see the Castle with all 200,000 lights beaming (whew! Waited a year to show them that!). One word. Magical. That's all.

Welcome to December and wow is this month flying by so quickly. I brought Julie, Jennie and Austin to the parks to experience a quick review of 3/4 parks. Mostly I wanted Jennie to experience the Kilmanjaro Safari. She had told me she had wanted to do one, so I wanted to make one wish come true for her at least. We met up at Downtown Disney and quickly raced to DAK before it closed. We were one of the last people to board the safari attraction. Whew. Close call, but kudos to Julie, Jennie and Austin who had to keep up with me. *grin* They didn't hate me too much cause the safari was awe-some! (In the words of Rhino!) *grin*. We had no wait for Everest so we rode that and it was amazing! Headed out to Disney's Hollywood Studios for an entertaining tram ride, then to eat a bite and watch the Lights. Austin and Jennie rode Tower of Terror while Julie and I shopped and found some awesome mugs. We then rushed to Epcot for Illuminations and some treats. All in all, it was a fun and quick trip. The kind I can handle when I'm not working. *grin*

Had a gentleman and his girlfriend on tour. Most of the time I felt like a third wheel, however they were super nice and it was a pretty productive and entertaining day. It was also a long day. And pretty draining mentally. I felt like every inch of me was aching the next day. Not sure exactly why, but was just an altogether exhausting tour. Perhaps it was just accumulation of everything going on in my life that affected me so much at that time. Who knows? Nonetheless, I got through it and have since recovered. *wink*

Saw the Dukes at Caseys and ordered and re-ordered a bit too much that night. Way too magical of a night for Carolyn. Julie was celebrating her end of Law Exams with some friends including some old friends of mine. One of them shared with me that basically he no longer believes in music. Music is one of the *only* things I believe in. Is this person telling me the thing I believe in doesn't exist to believe in or isn't worth believing it. My heart hurt. My eyes showed it. He had gotten burned and was bitter apparently. Decided to peace out again without telling anyone. I tend to do that. "She's always leavin without saying goodbye/she knows I never get mad." See Christian knows how I roll. I texted Austin to finish my drink (on my way home). When I got home, I texted Troy to see if he was ready to move the couches.Troy and I hugged it out. Thankfully, he still believes in music too. He revived my heart. Also thanks to Troy, I bought our friends couch and loveseat. YAY for furniture FINALLY! Jacob had helped me get a free coffee table from work peeps (thanks Lauren and Trent) so now we have a living room. Only took five months. Totally appreciate it now though.

Been touring a lot lately, can you tell? Took a night off to see Chris D'Agnese at Caseys with the crew. It was Jennie, Julie, Austin and myself. Dan and Matt showed up randomly. Ran into Tommy Hey-ya, which was very "small world". I love that about Orlando. I love going somewhere and just seeing people I know without planning on it. Makes you feel like you belong. That you are at home. I kinda dig it. Was great to see C D'Agnese and meet his friends from Austin. We met Adam, who is an amazing artist himself and has been assisting Chris in touring together. They were a great duo!

Had a couple of pretty easy going tours and not too stressful so that was pleasant! One of them was a heart-wrenching one. It's amazing how certain experiences can throw you into such a moment of gratitude for healthiness, happiness and family. One of my tours did just that for me. I teared up in certain circumstances the entire day. It was a hard tour to get through just because of the challenges, however it was a most gracious tour and I was glad to be apart of it.

Was a fielder in the office for the first time in what felt like months. Got into the swing of things pretty quickly. Just like riding a bike. Wasn't very busy, however did have some interesting calls for tours. Entertaining and kept me pretty productive the entire day. Rushed home to get ready for our CCMaD Show at Central Station Rock Bar. This was our first experience and opportunity to book at a downtown Orlando venue and we were ready, stoked and nervous about it. The only major setback to having our show this night, December 12th, was that Big 10-4 just happened to be hosting their big CD Release party at The Social feat. Brian Malpass *and* In Passing. So basically, all of our friends. All of our friends playing and all of our friends going to support, which led us to a fun little hump to somehow get over. Why didn't we book a different night? Only night offered to us from the venue. We had to take it. And we made it work, as best we could. Dirty Shannon (LOVE those boys!) opened for us and brought a crap-load of people. They were amazing at promoting! I can definitely see their growth from the last time we hosted them. So proud! James Roquemore, an amazing singer/songwriter/musician whom I just adore, graced us with his talents and Vic from Dirty Shannon was highly impressed with his voice. He sang a great version of "Oh Holy Night" to bring some holiday cheer at the end of his set and it was delightful. Robbie Hazen closed out the night with great entertainment. He was humorous and amazing playing what the crowd wanted as well as his upbeat originals. By that time, most of the crowd had teetered out unfortunately, but he did keep some drinkers there. I know it was hard to book on the same night as Big 10-4 and also it being a chilly night, but we did okay for our first try at this particular venue. Lessons learned and we move forward.

PS. We did have a LOT of our good friends come and visit to support Dirty Shannon/CCMaD before going to Big 10-4. Thank you for those of you who did. Meant more than you know.

PPS. Big 10-4's new album is amazing. I think my current favorite right now is "Vulnerable".

"Well I bet the rent that you're gonna feed me your two cents
Bottom lines and good advice, words from the wise, you've always got two left
And we'll find us some magazines or movie screens, we can be the story of the week

I never asked you what you're gonna do. I never asked you for your point of view.
You leave me screamin', You don't know cause you're not there at night

When she finds me in the dark and she wraps her arms around me
When it's so warm, but so cold on those nights
When I wake up all alone and I need that soul surrounding
When I'm over-exposed
You leave me vulnerable"
-Big 10-4 "Vulnerable"

Slept in a bit before heading to celebrate Adyn's 1st Birthday! Cali had a wondrous Safari Adventure planned out with maps to stations throughout her entire backyard, amazingly detailed decorations, etc. She went all out and had quite a few attendees. It was super fun to watch the kids (and parents) be entertained. G painted a star tattoo on my wrist that was pretty rockstar. I was impressed. We started a trend and soon all the kids wanted to be "tattooed". We have now began their addiction. Ha! Adyn was pretty great and took all the people, attention, etc like a champ! That kid impresses me to the fullest. I would have been crying by the time five people got there. *grin*

After the "kid" party, I wanted to attend an "adult" party so we headed to Wall Street. Julie, Austin, Tara, Liz, Amanda and James, Kasey and Brad, Danielle and Jenna, Aton and Danielle, Bill, new friends, etc hung out with the Dukes of Swagger in the freezing cold and had a blast! Christian and I were "twins". I was wearing a stripped grey and black shirt and he had on a hoodie that was *way* too similar. We had a photo shoot. My favorite part was when he actually parted his hair to try and match mine. Ha! I don't remember much of the late evening/early morning, but apparently everyone else did and reminded me of a few things. I think perhaps I danced too much? And apparently I made it an issue to say goodbye to everyone this night, which is very unlike "disappearing" Carolyn. *grin* Whatev.good times with good friends. I needed it. It had been too long. Yeah. Like a week. *giggle* A week too long.

Got up on Sunday regretting Saturday. Ate chips and salsa for breakfast around 11ish. Not the healthiest idea, but it did it's job. Got prepared for our Holiday Family Gathering. This was the second annual holiday dinner we have put together for our friends to come and celebrate good friends, good food and good times with us before the actual holiday so more people could attend. We had a pretty great turnout. Lots of additional things were apparently going on, however we had a great time with the wonderful people who could attend. Cali and Tony brought Adyn, Cfloyd, Christian and his friend Dwight, neighbors Jacob and Aaron, Nick (who still hasn't moved away - yay!), Jennie, Julie and Austin of course & Tara. It was random and great times. We had carbs coming out of our ears, but some salad and veggies through it off scale a bit, which was helpful! Jacob hung up lights in the backyard and made a fire pit next to our "outdoor Charlie Brown Christmas Tree". It was so great! I'm kinda in love with our backyard right now. Jennie and I decorated the inside with subtle reds with candles, linens, etc. It looked pretty magical. Jacob is letting us borrow his end table while his Christmas Tree is taking up extra room in his house, so we had that with their poinsettia on it. I loved the way we "fancied" our so not fancy place.

Today is actually Adyn's bday.so HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADYN!

This week holds many excitements for me. I am only working two days this week (yep, today counts as one.whoo hoo) then heading home to the ATL for an early Christmas celebration. My family is doing it early specifically so I can share it with them. A few members will be missing (West Coasters) and I hope they all know how much they will be missed. My bro's bday is this week. Whoo hoo! I'm so happy I get to share it with him, even if I am miles and miles away. My heart will be thinking of him regardless.

I know this happens every year around this time. Probably even more so this year, but I'm noticing the money issues are accumulating yet again. Don't get me wrong. I'm completely and in every way blessed. I have a job that I happen to love. I love where I live. I have great friends. Amazing family. I can't say it enough. But at the same time, it's tight. Added things to worry about. Lance has been having start up issues and that's not cool. It reminds me of Rhonda and I do not want to go down that road again. Ah well. Life works out. Somehow. *grin* You know it's bad when I start trying to figure out what I can sell on Ebay so I can pay for the new AAR album coming out this week. HA! Is it wrong that I'd rather have music than eat. Sorry, had to make a bad joke.

So that's my current update. Wow, I kinda wrote a novel. Means I don't have to write again for awhile, right? Ha. Nah. I need to get back into this..so I actually remember what happened in my life as I get older.

"I've been reading all the letters that you wrote me
all the fairy tales you sold me and all the pretty things you said...
I've been sleeping in the place that you left me, do you regret me? Did you forget me?
Can't stop thinkin about the way you control me, now you wish you'd never known me
how I wish you'd come and hold me"
-Tony Lucca "Pretty Things"