378. 08-01-89 SURREY - BEDDINGTON/WALLINGTON/CARSHALTON: WPR; COB; Iona. This trinity of Youngs pubs were visited, namely the "PLOUGH" in Beddington, the "DUKE'S HEAD" in Wallington, and the "GREYHOUND" in Carshalton. The SAR didn't attend due to the change in bus pass validity rules. The COB chauffeured the party round these dreary southern suburbs which were making absolutely no attempt to mark the one event that had just put them on the map, viz. Sutton knocking Coventry out of the FA Cup three hours earlier. In keeping up his record of having a pint in each Youngs pub the WPR found he was the only drinker and the evening didn't go with much of a "swing".

379. 11-01-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: Chair; WPR, Rick. The "CAMBRIDGE". A meeting nobody could remember anything about.

380. 17-01-89 LONDON W1/SW1 - FITZROVIA/WEST END: WPR; Rick; Tony (future BS). Meetings held before, in the "ROSE AND CROWN" and after, in the "CAPTAIN'S CABIN", a radio recording of "An Actor's Life for Me", starring John Gordon Sinclair, who provided the WPR with a fleeting brush with fame in the "Captain's Cabin" when he asked the WPR if he could take a nearby stool.

381. 28-01-89 WEST YORKSHIRE/CUMBRIA - LEEDS/CARLISLE: Single Pippin; COB, WPR; Simon (GWR). The Settle - Carlisle expedition. The party emanated from two locations: the prospective members for Freshford and Melksham and COB came from the latter's residence, and the WPR from Ta'Xbiex. On meeting at London King's Cross it was noted that the WPR had not yet purchased the Guardian. The Single Pippin almost lost a Mercury card and was deemed an "unconventional vandal". Two minutes late departing. COB confessed to excess imbibation the previous evening. Food was purchased as a palliative: 8 bacon and tomato rolls, 3 with cheese, 1 Ploughman�s sandwich, 5 teas, 3 coffees. On arrival at Wakefield (Westgate), the WPR remarked on an Escheresque staircase. The party was somewhat bemused by the failure to notice Fitzwilliam and Sandal and Agbrigg stations en route. Heard at Doncaster: "This is where we don't go to York". A relaxed arrival was made at Leeds after a stop 100 yards short of the platform. A lone train spotter was himself spotted and was the subject of many conversations as passengers tried to relieve the pre-arrival tension. Time for research was limited, there being sufficient only for a visit to the "WEST RIDING" where 8 pints Tetley and 4 rounds of various sandwiches were consumed. In this context, "various" refers to red Leicester cheese, turkey and ham; and 3 triangles comprise 1 round. A horrible wooden radiator was ridiculed. The Single Pippin moved an ashtray but their contents retained their original position in the horizontal plane. Their movement in the vertical plane was such as to impinge upon the head of the aforementioned's pint. Later he scattered his second pint with sandwich crumbs. The COB declared the subterranean part of the Leeds - Shipley journey, which was enhanced by a safety-conscious backwards seating plan, as "the scenic route". Various attempts northern accents were made by most members, the Single Pippin going so far as to say "Grand" to the barman in place of the more usual "Cheers, mate". It was noted for the Chairman's future reference that Shipley was found to be not too bad, but no Metal Box factory was spotted. Unplanned stop outside Crossflats Halt. Driver continually revving up to show he meant business, but not actually moving. Members (and indeed non-members) built up their strength by consuming chocolate bars (various). The train continued through countryside interrupted by numerous industrial towns. Bright sunshine illuminated the scenery and the rattling and vibration became intrusive. A number of passengers hastily changed seats. A bang was heard. Smoke began to fill the carriage. The party instinctively collected belongings and moved forward. "Sit down please", beamed the cheery guard, "it's just a fuse blown". "But there was a bang just before", protested a passenger. "It will do that - it's the fumes getting in". At this point, it was explained to the guard that broken fuses were not usually associated with sustained fires. The train was immediately halted and the contents of three fire extinguishers were sprayed in the general vicinity of the train. "As long as everybody's all right, that's the main thing", continued the guard happily, as dense fumes once more engulfed the carriage. After much efficient marching-about-aimlessly-type activity on the part of the various BR officials aboard the train, the journey continued at a somewhat more sedate pace to Skipton, where the smoke-filled carriage was cleared and the smouldering remains of the pride of BR's rolling stock was shunted unceremoniously on to a siding and abandoned. Anyway, a little while later the astute observer of railway life observed signs indicating - to the trained eye - the possibility of imminent failure of the now sadly depleted (rolling stock-wise) vehicle. Well, Imagine His Surprise, when the train lurched to a standstill yet again. After a moderate amount of poking about underneath the train and extensive negotiations with "control" via a train-side telephone members proceeded at 18mph in the happy knowledge that the gearbox had seized, and the number of gears now available to the crippled wreck was...one. The limping to the signal box at Blea Moor (sister of No More) just north of the Ribblehead viaduct having been accomplished, the hanging about and waiting could then, surely, logically, commence. Thus it then did. Certain members of the passengerial classes (none of the members of the SLBS party, naturally), abandoned the train at this point. 40 minutes later a type 31 arrived from Carnforth to haul members to Carlisle "... as long as everyone's all right". Simon was moved to observe: "Once I went On a train ride, / Through Yorkshire's glorious countryside. / The train caught fire, / The train seized up. / So I drank from the guard's billy-can cup." The COB was caught taking numerous catnips, particularly when the best scenery was on view. Arrived at Carlisle - general milling with eventual objective agreed - party set off. The COB's funometer wrapped around several times when a number of Routemasters operating route 61 were spied. There followed a test of some cash dispensers, some chips, and a long walk which turned out to be short. In the "WOOLPACK", 12 pints of Jennings Best, some soup, Cumberland sausages and pies, Lancastrian women saying "Och Aye", refusals of accommodation, and the dog who liked the bagpipes. 4 pints Hartleys, downed with difficulty in the very crowded "FRIAR". On to the "HOWARD ARMS", featured in the GBG. The Single Pippin decided that if he lived in Carlisle he would like this pub. 4 pints Theakston's bitter, jukebox used. Belinda Carlisle record playing prompted WPR to list all the towns he had been in where he had heard a singer of the same name (a trivially short list).

382. 29-01-89 TYNE AND WEAR/LONDON - NEWCASTLE/KING'S CROSS: Single Pippin; COB, WPR; Simon (GWR). Morning spent wandering round part of Carlisle watching part of it catch fire. Then a cross-country detour was made necessary by lack of trains out of Carlisle and others having been turned into buses. "BRIDGE HOTEL", Newcastle. 6 pts Tetleys. A Schism formed as 50% of the party went in search of comestibles. Reunited at the "NEWCASTLE ARMS" where 4 pints Youngers No. 3 washed down excellent value Sunday lunch. Spirits reached a high point, especially in certain members of the western contingent - this was quickly returned to normal by brief analysis. Returned to station in search of replenishment for the by now seriously depleted stocks of 35mm film. By metro to Byker "to be amazed at some excellent infrastructure". Stood for a brief while in a concrete wind tunnel (active) before returning to the station just too late for more photography. And so members bid farewell to the pearl of the North, and prepared themselves mentally for combat with BR's administrative wing... 17:00 departure from Newcastle. Five minutes into the journey a wily guard queried the status of the party's tickets. Members of the party countered with superbly timed facts causing the guard to retire hurt. Round 2; the senior conductor guard was added to BR's ammunition. Victory was assured on timely introduction of trump tickets in the guise of 50% discounted cheap day returns for the Carlisle - Newcastle leg. BR personnel retired in disarray, muttering darkly about the fate of Border ticket clerks. Themes of the Expedition were: Roy Orbison Song, "Well, as long as everyone's all right...", Fire, Weekend First, Fat children, Writing Minutes, Gross Flatulence, Cheep Beer, Regional accents and attempts thereat by members. Epilogue: 4 pints Tetleys in the "YORK BAR", King's Cross Station. Record for most cities in weekend was claimed, and Simon was elected to membership of the SLBS, with the title "Great Western Representative (GWR). The Single Pippin was elected to membership for the second time.

383. 07-02-89 LONDON SW1 - WESTMINSTER/WEST END: WPR; COB, Anth. Meetings held before, in "OLD SHADES", and after, in the "CAPTAIN'S CABIN" a radio recording of "Lenin of the Rovers" starring Alexei Sayle.

384. 12-02-89 LONDON WC2 - SOHO : Maria (Hon. Member); Chair & K, SAR & N, WPR, SOS. A large turnout of members occurred at opening time in the "IMPERIAL" to welcome Maria back to London. The party originally met (Chair & K, WPR only) to watch Chinese New Year ceremonies in and around Leicester Square. The ceremonies were found to feature lettuces predominantly, the chair being crossly told off by a passers by for referring to them as "cabbages". A meal which was interrupted when more lettuces on long poles were thrust out of the restaurant's windows was followed by a viewing of the film "Naked Gun" and tea at Nick Fish's residence. Notable absentees were the COB, who was demonstrating his anti-Imperialist stance, and Rick, who was laying down some tracks on wax in a long-drawn out groove session in a cellar in Hornsey. The meeting continued almost until closing time, when Members were presented with Polish Calendars. An SLBS expedition to Poland was mooted.

385. 14-02-89 LONDON SE1 - WATERLOO: WPR; SAR. These members met in the "TRIPS" bar at Waterloo Station, as they were on the way to a Polish evening in Wimbledon which was laid on in the honour of the Hon. Member (Wroclaw).

386. 17-02-89 LONDON NW5 - KENTISH TOWN: COB; WPR; several people from Xionics. The COB convened the meeting in the "FUZZOCK AND FIRKIN", Castle Road (Bruce's Brewery) on the day of its opening which the WPR attended in the unfulfilled hope of getting some free beer. The WPR demonstrated the Bacchanalian qualities of Bruce's products by telephoning the SAR and describing the venue in fluent German.

387. 25-02-89 LONDON N1 - ISLINGTON: WPR; SAR & N, Rick, Sec, SOS. The Membership assembled on a rather wet evening at the "MARQUESS TAVERN" in Canonbury Street. A preliminary discussion about South American Watersheds was interrupted by the arrival of Rick, who diverted conversation on to more contemporary issues, e.g. (I've got a) Fuzzbox (and I'm gonna Use it). Rick was than presented with the calendar from the Hon. Member (Poland) which followed a similarly (not quite so) contemporary theme, depicting current personalities on the Polish Music scene, such as Cliff Richard. Members of the Society were also amused by the names of the months in Polish.

388. 25-03-89 MIDDLESEX - TEDDINGTON/TWICKENHAM: WPR; COB. "ABERCORN ARMS" (Teddington) Youngs, "QUEEN DOWAGER" (Teddington) Youngs, "POPE'S GROTTO" (Twickenham) Youngs, "OLD ANCHOR" (Twickenham) Youngs. Extensive use of route 33 bus. The WPR reminisced about when he worked in Teddington but found he had forgotten where the pubs were.

389. 02-04-89 LONDON SE16 - ROTHERHITHE: SAR & N; WPR; Solange (of Brazil). The SAR & N arrived on a 188, after having accidentally located Solange on a 159 and inviting her to the Meeting as she did not know where she was going. The WPR rolled in soon afterwards on a P11. Youngs research was completed in the "SHIP" after a previous abortive attempt by an Anglo-Brazilian party. After this, the party moved to the "MAYFLOWER" for historical reasons.

390. 04-04-89 LONDON EC3 - CITY: WPR; SAR & N, COB, Rick; five working associates of the COB. This large party filled up most of the "EAST INDIA ARMS" and therein failed to solve any questions from the Times "Tournament of the Mind". Rick located the party at the exit from this venue, and they moved to "CHAPMAN'S (THE WINE LODGE)" where more spacious drinking ensued. Then members moved to the "LAMB" in Leadenhall Market, which was appreciated from the points of view of architecture and ambiance. The party sat upstairs, reaching their table by a spiral staircase. The venue was rapidly emptying and the Management indicated, using a variety of signs, that the meeting should soon be closed. On exit, members were entranced by the ethereal nature of the illuminations of the Lloyds building, as a result of which they dispersed in a number of wrong directions. However the COB's party successfully held together, carrying out further (unconstitutional) research in Islington.

391. 08-04-89 LONDON E2 - HACKNEY: Rick; SAR & N, WPR, COB, Anth; Patrick (future member), Jane. The tendency for SLBS meetings in remote North London to have a greater turnout than those in South London was confirmed at this meeting. The SAR & N encountered the COB on a 22B bus and arrived at the "ROYAL STANDARD" in Kingsland Road 30 seconds before opening time. A significant interval ensued before the arrival of the others; the next to turn up was Anth, who, due to the arrangement of mirrors behind the bar, was confused by an optical illusion regarding the party's position within the pub, such that the COB had to go outside in order to correctly orientate him. However the WPR demonstrated a more serious initial failure to locate the meeting, having tried to locate the venue in another Kingsland Road in West Ham. Because of the considerable delay in getting the party together, it did not move elsewhere; indeed there was adequate space for all, and a pleasant ambiance.

392. 12-04-89 LONDON W2 - PADDINGTON: Chair; WPR, Rick. "PADDINGTON STATION BAR", "DICKENS INN TAVERN", London Street. A third venue was visited but no record exists of where it was. An unadventurous tour of pubs in the Paddington region.

393. 16-04-89 LONDON N3, N12 - FINCHLEY/NORTH FINCHLEY: WPR, COB. Feeling bored while working over the weekend, the COB convened a lunch time meeting in the Finchley area. Good food was had in "MUSWELL'S" Regents Park Road, N3, not so much a pub as a lager outlet and restaurant. In need of real beer, the COB drove the WPR to "MOSS HALL TAVERN" (N12), a Fullers pub, before giving him a guided tour of the Xionics offices.

394. 22-04-89 KENT/LONDON SW1 - DARTFORD/VICTORIA: WPR; SAR & N, COB (Dartford only). The party met at 11 o'clock in the ticket office at London Bridge, and took the 11.05 to Dartford via Sidcup. The party then navigated on the basis of vague geographical notions held by the SAR and the COB, successfully finding the "MALT SHOVEL", the most easterly Youngs venue, at 12 o'clock. The pub was judged to be friendly, efficient and comfortable. Lunch was had; one course by the SAR & N and COB, and two by the WPR. Then the party continued to the "WAT TYLER", where the Peasant's Revolt was said to have been convened in 1381. Members sat in an elevated rear section of the bar, thus feeling detached from the world. The COB then left on a train back to London, while the rest of the party obtained their money's worth from the Network South East Day, taking trains via Chatham to Dover. Coffees were had in plastic cups on the sea front, and rock was bought by the WPR as a symbolic gesture. Despite objections from the WPR, the party returned on the 17.09 slow train to Victoria, as the SAR had to take a video back. However, there was time to appease the WPR with a pint of McEwans Export in "EDWARD'S BAR" in the Grosvenor Hotel, adjacent to Victoria Station. The Edwardian floral lighting was commented on by the WPR.

395. 01-05-89 BERKSHIRE - ETON WICK/MAIDENHEAD: WPR, Chair & K, COB; Nick Fish. The WPR and COB arrived at the newly opened "PICKWICK" in Eton Wick by slow train and walked through Windsor and Eton to find the others already there. After lunch a convoy of cars was driven back through Eton but finding nowhere to park Nick Fish went home. Earlier the COB announced that he was going home and alarmed Nick fish who thought he was going to jump out of the car at that instant. The Chair, Kath and WPR made their way to the "SKINDLES HOTEL" in Maidenhead, after rejecting an earlier pub recommended by Kath. The venue proved to be a weird vast crumbly old riverside hotel run by a young lad who ran the bar, served the food and probably made the beds and went up the chimneys. Chair: "We'd like some drinks". Boy: "Well, this is the place". Bemused pause all round. The evening was rounded off by tea on the lawn and then a curry in Reading.

396. 04-05-89 LONDON SW18 - WANDSWORTH: COB; WPR; Gary Mercer from Xionics. Xionics party arrived after epic bus journey (most of route 28 employed). "COUNTY ARMS" Youngs; outside garden, small. Large number of bars. En route to the "OLD SERGEANT" the COB looked for the site of the recent rail crash. The WPR left while others continued to mop up Wandsworth pubs. The COB was unimpressed by the early departure of the WPR.

397. 13-05-89 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: SAR & N; Sec, GR. This meeting constituted a Keele reunion, to start with in the "ALEXANDRA" which was rather full of Liverpool and Wimbledon fans after a match, and then proceeded uphill to the more salubrious atmosphere of the "KING OF DENMARK" where further refreshment was partaken.

398. 20-05-89 KENT/LONDON SE19 - CHISLEHURST/NORWOOD: SAR & N; WPR, COB. The WPR came via Streatham, thus equaling his previous record of seven journeys on public transport to reach a Young's pub. This was the second and last Kentish venue, namely the "BULL'S HEAD". The party sat outside for about an hour, in the extensive garden, and were in the process of going inside when the COB arrived for the second round. Having just missed a 227, the party moved to the "GORDON ARMS" (Courage) which was the terminal for the route. On return to Crystal Palace, the SAR & N went home, while the WPR and COB went to the "RAILWAY BELL", in Norwood.

399. 25-05-89 LONDON W1/NW1 - FITZROVIA/CAMDEN TOWN: Chair; WPR, Rick. The Chair had been to the "NORTHUMBERLAND ARMS" Tottenham Court Road (not Goodge Street) the previous week - found to be very similar in character to the more southerly one better known to the Society. The WPR then steered by a roundabout route to "TOM TIDDLERS TAVERN" Tolmers Square, near where he worked.

400. 29-05-89 SURREY/LONDON W8 - WALTON-ON-THE-HILL/BETCHWORTH/KENSINGTON: COB; WPR, Anth. The early start made to this lunch time tour of Surrey's Youngs pubs was rather wasted as Anth had overslept and had to be collected from Green Park Station. The COB drove to "CHEQUERS" Youngs, previously visited by the Society in colder weather, which this time featured a barbecue in the brilliantly sunny garden, and was strongly recommended by all. High hopes were held out for the "DOLPHIN" Youngs, but this turned out to be pretty ordinary with a couple of tables outside jammed between the wall and the ditch. On the way back a walk was undertaken on Headley Heath, where members stripped off their beer motif T shirts and lay down in the sun. A now forgotten venue, posy and disliked by all, was visited in the evening. The "BRITANNIA" Youngs, was much better. Members sat in a conservatory where smoking was forbidden, a rule intermittently observed by Anth in between cigarettes.

401. 30-05-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: WPR, Rick, Judy; several from Logica. Passing the Cambridge on his way to a leaving do in the "ROSE AND CROWN". the WPR saw Rick and Judy inside beckoning him in. He entered briefly then carried on to the Rose and Crown where Rick and Judy later joined him.

402. 07-06-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: WPR; Rick, Judy. The "WARREN" off Tottenham Court Road. Enticingly described as a real warren - a maze you can get completely lost in - this turned out to be an ordinary rectangular wine bar with some mirrors. Cold food.

403. 10-06-89 LONDON N6 - HIGHGATE: Patrick (future member); WPR, COB; Tony (future BS). Village pubs the "FLASK" Highgate Hill West, and the "OLD GATEHOUSE" North Road, on either side of the green, followed by the "BULL" North Hill. Bay leaf Tandoori considered too hot the food) by all except the BS. Finally the "WRESTLERS" North Road.

404. 17-06-89 LONDON W1 - ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING: The Society; Chair, Sec, WPR, SAR & N, Rick & Judy, COB, Anth, SOS, GR, Patrick, Tony (the BS). Having failed to convene itself on the Secretary's birthday, the supplementary constitutional adage "The WPR shall Act" was brought into effect, and the occasion became, additionally, a celebration of said Member's birthday. The Chair declared the meeting open at 7 p.m. precisely in the "CAMBRIDGE", which had been redesigned since the previous visit, with this reflected in the price of the beer. However, the pub was traditionally empty and the Society took over the southern flanks, the traditional northern enclave having ceased to exist as such. Consumption involved Ruddles, IPA, Fosters, Cider. Apple Juice etc., with a vast preference for Fosters, due to extremely hot weather, not to the degeneration of the Society into a gang of lager louts. Musical accompaniment was provided by Lloyd Cole and the Commotions and Doris Day (not together); the change from the former to the latter coinciding approximately with the arrival of Rick, a regular customer. Discussion focused on members' recent travels on business and pleasure, and the Welsh language (the WPR provided a phrase book). The highlight of the evening was the election of two new members, which took place after a formal enumeration by the Chair of the relevant points of the Constitution, to which not only Members and potential Members, but the whole pub, listened in silence. The first new member, Patrick, delivered a Manifesto in which he roundly supported the general aims of the Society; while the second, Tony, proposed that lunch time meetings on sunny days should be held in beer gardens; and furthermore, to support this proposal, convened a meeting in Ramsgate to practise it. Both members were admitted unanimously, with Tony receiving the title of the Barnsbury Square (BS). Some of the more traditional elements of the Society lamented the trend towards member's domiciled in North London (including the two new Members), but it was generally agreed that this was part of an irreversible geographical tendency, reflecting the fact that not only members' titles in the Society, but also the title of the Society itself, should reflect a place where the member/members no longer live(s).

405. 01-07-89 KENT - RAMSGATE: BS; WPR, COB, SAR & N (except "Camden Arms"), Sec, Chair & K (up to "Crown"). An advance party assembled at Victoria, and met the rest of the party at Ramsgate Station. The BS conducted members to the "FLYING HORSE" where the Chair solemnly declared the meeting open. A round of Flowers Bitter was had, and the First Lady led a session on the quiz machine, which netted sufficient funds to carry on to the "VALE TAVERN", the BS's local, where despite the late hour, food was available in amount and variety. Luckily, members were already ensconced in this venue when heavy rain fell outside. (It should be noted that the Chair was well down the road before the BS diverted the meeting due to the threat of rain). Two rounds mostly featuring Stones and Toby Bitter, but also involving San Miguel Lager, were had. The party was visited by the establishment's dog, whose amiability was not rewarded by donations of food. A coastal interlude followed on the West Cliff, where admiration of a thundery skyline and a departing ferry took place. Eventually the party visited the "CROWN", a dark central location where a rather tired round of Fremlins/Pils etc. was had, and discussion focused on CDs and other recording media. The pub was felt by the COB to smell of dog, but not in an excremental sense. The appearance of Kylie Minogue on the jukebox allegedly aroused excitement in the SAR at 5.00 p.m. After another coastal interlude on the East Cliff, where the WPR attempted to visit the Sea, members were shown to their temporary lodgings, while the Sec returned and the Chair and K retired to a secret venue in Broadstairs. The liveliest members soon reconvened at the "CAMDEN ARMS", where Glenfiddich, Jack Daniels and Famous Grouse were had by way of whisky/bourbon. It took 20 minutes for the landlord to remember who the BS's father was. The party learnt the location of the original Lyons Corner House. The COB's umbrella disintegrated outside, and again in front of an old drunk who enquired as to whether the party needed a corkscrew. The SAR & N rejoined the party in the "OAK AND SHADES" on the sea front, where they found the COB drinking orange juice due to the lack of Beer. This was followed by a round of Jack Daniels and more lager for the WPR, who nostalged about "First Class" records. A message was received from the Chair to the effect that he and the First Lady would not be taking Dinner, as follows; "Is there anyone here called Ed Watt - well Mr. and Mrs. Pinfold won't be joining him for Dinner". It was suggested that the Chair be training for the Third Age. Meanwhile, the COB discovered a truly remarkable proof that "a to the power n + b to the power n = c to the power n" has no solutions for n > 2. However he did not have enough paper to contain it. Dinner and drinks were then taken at the "Captain's Table". Members bounced up and down in vertically suspended basket chairs. The BS committed a minor faux-pas by ordering an excessively sweet wine, which he was obliged thereby to consume; however the Management exhibited even greater lack of viticultural awareness by suggesting more of the same when the party enquired as to something drier. The meeting closed as the BS failed to interest the party in Ramsgate's nightclubs.

406. 06-07-89 LONDON W14/SW6 - KENSINGTON/FULHAM: COB; Chair, WPR, Anth, SAR & N ("Cafe do Brasil" only); Kevin from Xionics, Stavros from Cyprus and Xionics, Sarah from Xionics. The Society was again present at the opening ceremony of a Bruce's pub; this time, the "FRIGATE AND FIRKIN", where pints of Frigate Bitter were had. The venue was of special interest to the COB, it being near his residence. Then the party took a 28 bus to the "Cafe do Brasil" near Fulham Broadway, where they met the SAR & N, who had already undergone an expansion in the party's table consequent on a telephone call from the previous venue. A selection of Brazilian dishes were had (and very much appreciated by Members and non-Members alike), and were washed down by "Brahma" beer from Rio de Janeiro and Portuguese Wine. At the end of the meal, the SAR & N made a COB-style getaway on a 11 bus, while the rest of the party had a post-prandial beverage, by way of drink, in the "GEORGE".

407. 15-07-89 LONDON W2/W8 - PADDINGTON/KENSINGTON: Chair; WPR. Expedition to sample pubs with gardens, chosen with the aid of reference books. The Chair had just been on a case. Rendezvous at "THE DICKENS". Then "THE SWAN". Not so much a garden, more a forecourt on the very busy Bayswater Road. A transambulation was then made of Kensington Gardens to the "WINDSOR CASTLE", Campden Hill Road. Claimed by Nicholson's London Pub Guide that when built in 1835 it was possible to see Windsor Castle from the pub. After consuming meals in the pleasant stony garden, members returned to their respective domiciles.

408. 22-07-89 LONDON SW19 - AARDVARK-BONG'S PARTY: Aardvark-Bong; Chair & K, SAR & N, WPR, Rick & Judy, John; Jan, Lorraine, Sam(antha), numerous other revellers. This traditional annual event brought together the "old guard" of the Society, and restored certain members from a dormant status, a situation which led to some initial confusion regarding the identification of some members by the Conveners and vice-versa. The party largely took place outside on a sultry evening. The Treaty of Heidelberg was renewed for a further five years between the WPR and SAR; John declined to become a signatory in place of Stolarski despite having been present at the original event 20 years ago.

409. 29-07-89 SURREY - CHERTSEY/WALTON-ON-THAMES: SAR & N; WPR, COB (not "King's Arms"). The WPR met the SAR & N on a train passing through Clapham Junction heading towards Chertsey, where the party arrived at 3.30 p.m. The "KING'S ARMS", near the station, was open so 2 pints of best and an Orange Juice were had by way of refreshment in a deserted Beer Garden featuring a tatty marquee and a painted tree trunk resembling an ethnic deity. The walk through Chertsey was further punctuated by a stop at a Kebab House, whose produce was sampled in the grounds of the local library. Then the ruins of Chertsey Abbey were inspected, and a walk to the River was entered into; however the River was not found, because the party got lost in a water works. Returning to Chertsey, liaison was effected with the COB in the "CROWN", where refreshment to the tune of Young's Ordinary was had in the spacious garden, and a variety of birdlife was noted, together with some itinerant hens. A wedding celebration appeared to be going on upstairs, but otherwise the venue was quite, it still being only 5.30 p.m. The COB then ferried the party in his car to the "SWAN" in Walton-on-Thames, where the river could be seen. Again the party sat outside on the extensive and rambling riparian terrace. It became slightly cool, an event for which Members were unprepared, and therefore they did not wait for a barbecue. The COB again ferried the party to the "ROYAL GEORGE" which is not really in Walton-on-Thames but in Hersham. Here members sat inside and the WPR and COB had a cheese roll (this being the third instance of eating by the WPR at this meeting). Then the COB (to whom credit is expressed) took the SAR & N and the WPR to suitable transport nodes.

410. 31-07-89 LONDON EC3 - CITY: SAR & N; WPR, Sec (not "Lamb"), COB; Gary (not "Lamb"). The party assembled in the "THREE LORDS" in Minories, where a non-smoking downstairs bar was used. A large historical notice describing events on the site since Roman times was ignored by the WPR because it had only been put there in 1986 and therefore was not historical in itself. The COB and Gary arrived late, having already completed (unconstitutional) visits to the "EAST INDIA ARMS" and the "CHAPMANS (THE WINE LODGE)", which were necessitated by the COB having forgotten his Youngs list on the previous City visit. This rushed schedule rendered him incapable of solving an algorithm posed to him by the SAR to do with account number generation, and, no sooner had he not done this, than the bar closed (at 7.30 p.m.) so the meeting had to move on. The SAR resisted a WPR-led attempt to eat at an inferior Aldgate curry-house, while the Sec. and Gary headed home. The remaining party, already split over the Aldgate curry-house question, were faced with a further dilemma when a 35 bus going in the direction of Hackney rapidly approached. The party's original intention had been to go to a Young's pub there, but in addition the COB needed to visit the "Lamb" in Leadenhall Market. It should be noted that the COB displayed a remarkable degree of selflessness by running for the 35 bus, which he might have caught, had not the remainder of the party dallied. At this point, rather than wait for another bus, members drifted gradually into the "LAMB" and had a round there before that, too, closed. Finally, the SAR & N and the WPR witnessed the COB miss two buses at Bank, and descended to the Underground, leaving him running round in circles unsure of what to do next.

411. 05-08-89 LONDON N1 - BARNSBURY: BS; WPR, COB, Rick, Sec, GR, Patrick; Karen, Jan, Paul. A large gathering convened outside "THE ALBION" (Chef and Brewer) in the sun for the BS's tour of his local region. Confusion over rounds of Ruddles and Lager. The next stop was the "HEMINGFORD ARMS" where Patrick joined the party, and Thwaites, Palmers, Pedigree and Adnams were drunk. The Convener then led the group on a long walk to the "FLOUNDER AND FIRKIN" where outside was again sat and Fish and Whale beer consumed. After this, a dump called "THE VICTORIA" was visited, which featured a large crowd waiting for music which was actually quite good. Courage and Fosters drunk. The final venue was "THE POCOCK" where members stayed late to consume yet more Courage and Fosters, before being directed home on a variety of buses chosen by Patrick.

412. 12-08-89 LONDON N6 - HIGHGATE: WPR; BS, COB, Sec, Patrick; Karen, Jan, Paul, Simon. The WPR conducted an investigation into drinking facilities in his own area, as a sequel to the BS's Barnsbury tour. Members met outside "THE FLASK" as established by tradition, and moved on to the "OLD GATE HOUSE" (Chef and Brewer) where a trivia machine was found but on which Simon, despite his earlier experiences, did not win. More outside drinking took place at the "RED LION AND SUN" (Charrington), North Road. The WPR then led members to the Archway Road area and the newly reopened "BLACK ROSE", followed by "THE WOODMAN". At some point during the course of all this the COB was observed to drink half a pint of Lager. Afterwards the BS, Patrick, Karen and Jan continued to the WPR's flat for further informal entertainment.

413. 18-08-89 LONDON NW6/NW8 - KILBURN/PADDINGTON: WPR; SAR & N. The SAR & N arrived first in the "QUEENS ARMS" in Kilburn High Road, and waited for the WPR in front of a display of clay pipes. The COB was already in Scotland on a pre-SLBS visit, so the other members decided to visit this ex-local of his. After this research was cleared up, the WPR conducted the party to "CROCKERS", by a slightly circuitous route, in which he got confused between Abercorn Road and Aberdeen Place. However this gave members the opportunity to inspect a famous street sign in Abbey Road, which contained inscriptions by Beatles fans worldwide, and which the WPR had seen on Television. Dinner, as well as eponymous Beer, were had in Crockers, where the ornate architecture and luxurious furniture were noted. It should be pointed out that Nadir drank a quantity of Cider to the tune of one pint; not by design, but through a requisition anomaly at the WPR/Barman interface. The WPR explained that this pub, of emporial proportions, was built as an adjunct to Paddington Station, while the latter was then built somewhere else, thus demoting the pub to the status of a Folly. The SAR & N then waited ages for a 159 bus, which appeared to be rare in its northern periphery.

414. 20-08-89 LOTHIAN - EDINBURGH: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. A meeting took place in the "WATERLOO BAR" before attending the play "Sisters".

415. 21-08-89 LOTHIAN - EDINBURGH: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. A meeting took place in the "WORLD'S END" before attending the play "Sink the Belgrano" and the film "Porcine", followed by a return visit to fortify members before their attendance at the mime "Success from A to B".

416. 22-08-89 LOTHIAN - MUSSELBURGH/EDINBURGH: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. The "VOLUNTEER ARMS", Leith Walk, Musselburgh was visited and, later in the day, the "WORLD'S END".

417. 23-08-89 SCOTLAND: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. A meeting took place in the "SIGHTHILL HOTEL" in a now forgotten location.

418. 24-08-89 STRATHCLYDE - CONNEL: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. A meeting took place in the "DUNSTAFFNAGE HOTEL".

419. 25-08-89 TAYSIDE/LOTHIAN - BLAIR ATHOL/ABERLADY: COB; WPR, Single Pippin, GWR. Meetings took place in the "BRUAR FALLS HOTEL", Blair Atholl, and the "KILSPINDIE HOTEL", Aberlady.

420. 31-08-89 LONDON E8 - HACKNEY: WPR; SAR & N, COB, Sec. Again, the SAR & N arrived first, at 6 o'clock, on a No. 6 bus which deposited them at the entrance to the "ROSE & CROWN" in Mare Street. A local artist was noted, together with half-finished works lying around the tables, and finished ones adorning the walls. Another in-house attraction was the juke-box being repaired. The Sec. arrived next, then the COB, and finally the WPR, who, again, had steadfastly declined to use bus transport to arrive at the venue despite the possibility of being deposited at the door, but instead went to Liverpool Street where he failed to find a train stopping at Cambridge Heath, and in the end had to resort to a taxi, which wanted to take him to a different Rose & Crown. The COB stated that he intended to take up evening classes in Gaelic, despite protestations from other Members as to its usefulness. He replied that that was not the point, and proceeded to make a very sudden departure (reminiscent of early COB). The WPR expressed concern about the sanity of the COB; another round was had, but by this time indifference was beginning to prevail, and despite the WPR's attempts to prolong the meeting, it closed at 8 p.m. and the party took a 35 bus, and got off in various places.

421. 04-09-89 LONDON SE6/SE12 - CATFORD/LEE: SAR & N; WPR, COB, Sec. Members arrived by train and bus at the "CATFORD RAM", after having experienced difficulties locating the venue, whose outside apparitions are merely a couple of doors in a shopping precinct. However the interior contrasted markedly with the exterior, with a windowless expanse made to appear of indeterminate to infinite size by a circumference of mirrors. Two rounds of Youngs Ordinary were had, owing to a delay in the arrival of the COB. Members sat in a raised area to the side of the semi-circular bar. Following this, the party moved eastwards on a 160 minibus, after becoming involved in a peashooting match at the bus stop, which reminded the WPR of what it must be like to be in a Top of the Pops audience. After a geographical decision at a crossroads, members located the "CROWN" in Burnt Ash Hill, a spacious and friendly venue where one round was had.

422. 07-09-89 LONDON W14 - WEST KENSINGTON: COB; Anth, BS, WPR; Several members of Xionics. A TV recording featuring Alexei Sayle was viewed in Shepherd's Bush, after which the COB exercised his right as Convener to direct the party miles away to the "FRIGATE AND FIRKIN", in the middle of nowhere but very handy for the COB. There they had a quick drink and then left again to go to some ostentatious food outlet, leaving Anth, the BS and WPR to uphold the Object of the Society, which they had no trouble in doing.

423. 08-09-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: BS; WPR, Rick, Judy; others from Logica. While the WPR, BS and others from Logica were having a drink outside the "ROSE AND CROWN", Rick and Judy were observed drinking inside. The meeting became constitutional when the latter pair moved outside, taking their stools with them, but became unconstitutional again shortly afterwards when they left to "walk the dog".

424. 12-09-89 LONDON SE10 - GREENWICH: WPR; COB, Sec. The WPR and Sec met serendipitously at Charing Cross at 6 p.m., and had a laborious diverted journey to Lewisham, the railway line to Greenwich having been closed due to post- thunderstorm flooding. Members thus took a bus (despite being correctly advised by the driver that it would be quicker to walk) to Greenwich South Street, whence the "RICHARD I" was reached and Youngs Ordinary and Special were sampled. The occasion was by the time reminding the Sec of the 1982 'hard-core' event in Rotherhithe. The COB appeared at 7.50 p.m., having also had a leisurely journey (Northern Line to Elephant and Castle followed by 188 bus at a crawl; two hours from door to door). A wide spectrum of clientele was observed at the bar - very trendy at the door end, more parochial at the bar end. Members then returned from Greenwich station, services having been resumed.

425. 19-09-89 EAST SUSSEX - PLUMPTON GREEN: WPR; COB. Disruption on the Victoria Line meant the WPR and COB caught the train separately and met on Plumpton Green station. The COB's evening was dominated by angst over lack of a train ticket and fear of imminent arrest on his return to Victoria. The "FOUNTAIN INN" (Youngs), the objective of the visit, was found to be pleasant, and featured many stories of the establishment's recent 21st anniversary, which occasion the WPR marked by purchasing a bottle of "Sir Len's Ale". Landlord's son serving. Return on last train (7:31).

426. 21-09-89 LONDON SW1 - WEST END: WPR, BS; Patrick; Robin (from Xoren). The party and COB attended a radio recording of the "Mary Whitehouse Experience" at the Paris Studio, after which they all paid a traditional visit to the "CAPTAIN'S CABIN" except for the COB who was already fully tanked up.

427. 25-09-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: Chair; WPR, Rick, BS. Traditional visits were paid to the "CAMBRIDGE" for drink and "Neel Kamal" for food.

428. 01-10-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: WPR; Chair, Rick, BS. The meeting took place in the traditional venue known as the "CAMBRIDGE" in Goodge Street, where the Chair arrived and set the drinking pace, while outlining several recent developments in the packaging industry to a bored (but respectful) audience. After three rounds he was upstaged by the BS, who embarked on a peroration about the qualities of DAT (Digital Audio Tape). This reminded the Chair of a reggae record, which he sang. Rick was so overcome by this performance that he fell asleep on a train and woke up being shaken in Wimbledon.

429. 12-10-89 LONDON WC2 - SOHO: SAR & N; GR; Dalva (of Brazil), Robin (of Lloyds Bank). The meeting took place in the upstairs section of the "CHANDOS", which the WPR failed to find; he having been downstairs, left. The GR outlined his plans for an international airport and leisure complex in Cornwall, which was greeted with howls of laughter.

430. 24-10-89 LONDON W1 - SOHO: WPR; SAR & N, COB, Rick and Judy, Maria (Hon. Member (Poland)); Marzena (Hon. member (Poland)'s Sister), Marta, Chris. The first members to arrive at this meeting were the SAR & N, who found a spacious area upstairs, which the WPR failed to find. However, the SAR located the WPR, together with other Members, downstairs, and brought them upstairs, and upbraided the WPR with the necessary epithets. The WPR parried, invoking the Treaty of Heidelberg (1969), under whose terms this dispute was settled. The meeting then got underway, it being notable for the presence of an equal number of Ladies as Gentlemen; largely due to the Polish delegation, which handed out vodka, keyrings, vases and ceremonial swords to Members. Greene King IPA, Abbot, Brakspears and Ruddles were consumed by way of refreshment by the Gentlemen, whereas Orange Juice, Vodka, Gin and Lager were had by the Ladies. Conversation revolved largely around Contemporary Music and Information Technology related matters.

431. 26-10-89 LONDON W1 - SOHO: WPR; Chair ("Imperial" only"), SAR & N, BS, Maria ("Imperial" only), Marzena ("Imperial" only), Robin (not "Imperial"). The WPR and the BS met at the "FALCON", to be joined later by the SAR & N and Robin, after an unnecessary northwards detour in light rain. On entry to the Falcon, The WPR was UPSTAIRS looking for the SAR (something he failed to do at the two previous meetings). Some computing subjects were again discussed, over pints of Ruddles and Lager, but soon Food became a priority, so the party crossed the road to the "Wong Kei" restaurant, which was full of customers, and service was without frills, though the food was palatable. The meal finished at around 8 o'clock, and members, minus Robin, proceeded to the "IMPERIAL" where the rest of the party had not yet assembled. A table was commandeered near the door, by a process of attrition. The Chair arrived last, explaining that his journey had been slowed down by transport difficulties and the First Lady's ablutions before proceeding to Ealing. Undaunted, he proceeded to demonstrate his wide knowledge of London/Warsaw flight scheduling to Maria and Marzena, who expressed polite incredulity about this man's seemingly endless repertoire of trivia.

432. 17-11-89 LONDON SW15: WPR; COB. "COACH AND HORSES". Suetty chicken pie lunch refuge from cold misty day. "MALTESE CAT". Pissed barman and obtrusive landlady. "ANGEL". Surprisingly crowded for mid-afternoon. "GREEN MAN". View of departing 14s gave COB itchy feet.

433. 24-11-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: COB; Rick, Anth, WPR, BS; Mike, Chris (Hoppo), Bruce (future Oracle), Sanjay from Logica (briefly), Associate of Rick's from PRS (briefly), Woman who Sat Next to Anth, Ganesh and Figen from Logica (non drinking). An unusually diverse gathering of members and associates from various eras took place in "THE NORTHUMBERLAND ARMS", one of the Society's historic meeting places.

434. 25-11-89 LONDON W1 - WEST END: BS; WPR, COB; Paul, Fiona. After attending a radio recording of the "Dear Jenny, Dear Julie" at the Paris Studio, the party took refreshments in the "LEICESTER ARMS" and participated in discussions with political and comic flavour. This was followed for the BS and WPR by burgers and video games.

435. 28-11-89 LONDON W6 - HAMMERSMITH: WPR; Chair, Kath, Rick, Judy, Anth, COB; John Coffey, Gary. The group convened in "THE BUILDERS" as a prelude to a performance by Ben Elton at the Hammersmith Odeon, where they were also joined by the BS, members of the COB's family, Karen and Jeff. The COB is reported to have enjoyed a brief pre-performance sojourn in the cosy back bar.

436. 29-11-89 LONDON E6/E7: SOS; WPR, COB. The SOS took members to the "GREEN MAN", E6, for a multi-barred experience, followed by an Indian meal at "Shimla", Penge Road E13. The evening concluded with a visit to "YE OLDE SPOTTED DOG", E7.

437. 07-12-89 LONDON W6 - HAMMERSMITH: BS; Rick, WPR. Members enjoyed a "Hawkwind" concert in the "HAMMERSMITH ODEON", followed by beer at the "HOP POLES".

438. 09-12-89 OXFORDSHIRE/BERKSHIRE - MAIDEN TROUSER/READING: Chair & K; SAR & N, Elephant & Castle. The Chair met the SAR & N at the northern exit of Reading Station (where they had, shortly before, smashed a bottle of Italian wine over the concourse), and conducted them to his residence, where the Elephant & Castle were already ensconced. A lunch time sortie northwards into Oxfordshire took place; the "FIVE HORSESHOES" was visited for consumption of Brakspears and Lunch. A short walk was entered into by way of exercise, then members returned to the Chair's residence for the showing of Harry Enfield and Victoria Wood videos. After being plied with coffee and tea, the party moved on foot towards the river and partook of Weatherheedstunt's Winter Special in a mesofluvial location called "PIPER'S".

439. 14-12-89 LONDON SW1 - PIMLICO: COB; SAR & N, WPR, SOS. Members met in the "MORPETH ARMS" for a mid-December meeting. The SOS reminisced about a romantic encounter that he once had in Pimlico.

440. 22-12-89 LONDON W1 - FITZROVIA: WPR; Chair, Rick, Judy, Sec, COB, Patrick, SOS, BS; Karen, Jan, Xionic Nigel (future IO), 2 colleagues of Patrick. SLBS Christmas meeting, held in the "CAMBRIDGE". First the Chair met the WPR and had some drinks on the WPR's office, while at the same time Rick and Judy were in the aforementioned pub. The Chair and WPR went there but, finding it too packed, had a drink in the "NORTHUMBERLAND ARMS" instead. On returning to the "CAMBRIDGE" the Chair became distinctly off colour and went home. Rick and Judy in the meantime had gone for a pizza, but Jan and Karen had arrived, later joined by the Sec and others, and a game of trivial pursuit occurred. Minor violence from PRS employees and general crowding led the main party (Rick, Judy, Sec, SPS, Karen, Jan, WPR) to move to the "ROSE AND CROWN", leaving the COB and Patrick to look out for late arrivals, thus producing the second schism of the evening. This was resolved when the main party returned to "THE CAMBRIDGE", where the COB and Patrick's colleagues had arrived. Eventually, most members left for a Greek meal, leaving Rick and Judy in the pub, where the BS joined them after participating in alternative festivities in the Soho area.

441. 24-12-89 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: SAR & N; WPR, Rick, Maria; Marzena, Duncan and Barbara, Kevin (B's brother). Advance parties assembled at 49 Church Road, then moved to the "DOG & FOX", where the side of the bar near the toilets was occupied by the Society, as it was last year. The singing by the inhabitants of the pub was less enthusiastic, however the presence of a larger SLBS contingent was judged to be a cause for optimism. A concluding whisky was had by way of a nightcap before the WPR and Rick left in a fleet of minicabs.

442. 30-12-89 SURREY - SURBITON/KINGSTON: WPR; SAR & N; Duncan & Barbara ("Grey Horse" only). The purpose of this meeting was to finish the list of Youngs Pubs before the end of the decade. The party met in the "BLACK LION" in Surbiton, the WPR being the first to arrive. Other than the Members, the pub was almost entirely populated by British Rail or Post Office employees. Some pictures depicting canine snooker matches were noted; the WPR found them unrealistic and slightly distasteful. Shortly afterwards, the "VICTORIA" was visited; this was largely filled with a geriatric population. Then a Kingstonward trend occurred, the WPR egging the arty on into a trot, to arrive at the "SPRING GROVE TAVERN" two seconds before closing time at 3 o'clock. The pub was friendly and well decorated. At 3.30 food was a priority, so Pasta and Pizza were had at the Deep Pan, after which some shops were looked at - the only sale purchase being that by the WPR of liqueur chocolates in Woolworths. Members then went on to the "BISHOP OUT OF RESIDENCE", where Nadir fell asleep, and the SAR and WPR took 1 1/2 hours to finish their Beer. The feeling of timelessness was augmented by the situation and architecture of the pub, making the party feel that they were on board ship, five hours from port; this added to members' listlessness. An adjacent party held an interminable discussion on the different ways of reserving seats on trains in Stafford - this discussion outclassed even the SLBS specialists in this kind of repartee. Finally, Duncan and Barbara were contacted at the concluding pub - the "GREY HORSE", where two rounds were had with them. The pub filled up with young people in black leather uniforms in preparation for a gig. Barbara remarked how fortunate it was that older people (such as the SLBS) did not all have to wear the same clothes. The meeting ended at 20.30.

443. 31-12-89 - 01-01-90 LONDON N6 - HIGHGATE: WPR; SAR & N, Rick, BS; Solange. The WPR again threw open his residence to the Society for New Year celebrations. Members convened around 7 o'clock (except Rick) for Fruit Entrees, Ham and Baked Potatoes by the WPR followed by sweets by the SAR & N, washed down with Bulgarian and French Wines. The party left at 10 p.m. and were accosted by a figure who appeared to be a reveller, but in fact was Rick. They then went to the "BLACK ROSE", which provided members with sufficient room and, at the same time, a festive atmosphere. The meeting started at the front of the pub, then gravitated to the back, where there was more activity, including a disco. The new decade was brought in in this way, after two pints of Fosters had been accidentally directed floorwards. The game of Trivial Pursuit followed, accompanied by champagne from the Cellars of WPR.