10/01/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - NEWCASTLE-UNDER-LYME: SAR, GR, Kevin, Rosemary. "ALBION". Polish Cherry Vodka was had afterwards.

88. 15/01/81 SURREY - KINGSTON: Convened by Chair; present SAR, Rick. The "KINGSTON MILL"; the Chair met an acquaintance from Nursery School there.

89. 10/02/81 LONDON SW3 - CHELSEA: Convened by Rick; present Chair, WPR. The "Sloane Square Session" was started by the Chair and WPR being thrown out of Our Price Records, to be joined by Rick a few minutes later. First pub was the "SLOANE'S WINE BAR" (Courage), with stained glass door and pictures of George Bernard Shaw on the walls. Cleese, etc. discussed. It was, to remind the members, the bar of Shaw, to say it all. Next, the "ROYAL COURT TAVERN" (Free House); Ruddles "Blue" was had, and Sam Smith's Old Brewery Bitter. Stuffed rodents hung on the wall. Orange lampshades, ornate barstools and tasteless caricatures on the walls (not the stools) indicated that the party was still in Theatreland. Next, some very important phone calls were made, and the Yellow Pages inspected for Pizzerias. Finally, the meeting decided to head down King's Road, which was where it wasn't at, and had 3 course nosh-ups at the Chelsea "Cream and diced carrots" Kitchen, to the soothing light accompaniment of the "Hallelujah Chorus", the "Flight of the Bumble Bee", "Hall of the Mountain King", and "Carmen" (excerpts). The "CHELSEA DRUGSTORE" was then visited, as recommended by Rick for the topless barmaids, who were up some seedy chained off stairs. The party therefore stayed downstairs, and had lager and Worthington E. The juke box played Diana Ross, although instructed to play Lynyrd Skynyrd. Invincol was played, and then members went to the "MARKHAM", where Coke was drunk by Rick, to the Chair's consternation. Draughty Chair proudly pulled a lump of wood off the bog and presented it to Rick, who was strangely unimpressed. Nothing to say really. Whisky in the Jar again. Finally, a return was made to the Royal Court Tavern. Verdict - better than Epsom. The Chair told a joke, bravely ignoring the stuffed turbot immediately above his head.

90. 27/02/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - KEELE: Convened by SAR, present SOS. The SAR met the SOS at Etruria; members went to the "GOLF INN".

91. 13/03/81 LONDON WC2/W1 - ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING: Convened by the Society; present Chair, SAR, WPR. A poorly attended Annual General Meeting. The Chair arrived at the "MARQUIS OF ANGLESEY" at 6.25, the WPR at 6.55, and the SAR at 7.00. The WPR complained, as is traditional. The pub was very crowded, but the party managed to get seats and averaged 3 pints. On leaving, members found a cultural tour outside, which the Chair and WPR tried to follow, but the SAR became embarrassed because his colleagues were drunk, and might appear a bit "tearaway" in the face of a group of rather refined OAPs studying the history of Covent Garden. So the party moved off to "Tango's" restaurant, where the waitresses in jumpsuits attracted the Chair, who then proceeded to eat stuffed peppers, which he described as "stuffed with everything". The party was vocally assaulted by a singer/pianist who sported a Rasta haircut and yelled Dean Martin-type songs with words like Babeh Babeh yeh yeh yeh oooh yeh. Applause was conspicuously absent but he was undeterred. Nearby couples carried on uncomprehending conversations with gestures and the occasional shriek, but the piano player would not relent; determined to thwart conversation, he ended his song by shouting "Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba!". The WPR had a self-extending propelling pencil, which the SAR broke. The Chair was suffering inexorably from hiccups, ordered a glass of water, went under the table and drunk it retrospectively three times. The WPR and SAR became very embarrassed. A long walk was then ambulated, ending up at the "FITZROY" (Sam Smiths). The heady days of anarchism were lamented by the WPR and the offshore banking businessman. Was the party's neighbour somebody from Spandau Ballet, with painted teardrops, Lilley and Skinner 99p reject blue slippers and studded tartan plastic trousers?

92. 14/03/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by WPR; present Chair, First Lady B, SAR. The meeting took place in a rather obscure part of the "ALEXANDRA" and the SAR had to go up and down the hill several times to find it.

93. 16/04/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - KEELE: SAR, Sec, Alistair, Second Lady A. "SNEYD ARMS".

94. 08/05/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - STOKE-ON-TRENT: Convened by SAR; present Chair, First Lady B (not the Glebe), Second Lady A. The Chair arrived promptly at Stoke, while Second Lady A accidentally met one of her school friends too. First Lady B was not on the expected train, so the rest of the party went to the "GLEBE" (1 pint Banks's) and then to the "Rose Garden" restaurant for Lager and Indian food. During the meal the Chair went outside to collect First Lady B, but she had outwitted his planning by changing trains at Stafford. She then had a meal and was hovered over by the waiter. Members then walked a larger distance than anticipated to the "JOLLY POTTERS", with the Chair carrying several suitcases of heavy engineering tools. 1 pint Mitchell and Butlers was had, and the party were forced to stand in the corridor. Then a taxi was taken back to Keele, where the Chair made a customary inspection of the fuse box.

95. 09/05/81 SHROPSHIRE/STAFFORDSHIRE - SHREWSBURY / MARKET DRAYTON / NEWCASTLE-UNDER -LYME / KEELE: Convened by SAR, present Chair, First Lady B, Sec (Keele only). After confusion as to the fare on the bus, which involved a visit to the Inspector of Buses who said "he's got problems" (of the bus driver) "we give him all the dud information", the fare of two pounds and 15 pence was paid, amidst consternation that anyone should be travelling such a distance. Orientated by a visit to Tourist Information; customary purchase of leaflets. 1 pint Flowers (fizzy) was had in the "THREE FISHES" (Whitbread), where there were preliminaries to the F.A. Cup final on the television, competing with the juke box. Then members continued to the "SHREWSBURY ARMS/LOGGERHEADS" (dual nomenclature noted with interest), where there were a number of rather seedy rooms, and the party sat in a dingy back room with 1 pint Mitchell and Butlers. Food was had here (scampi, gammon, cottage pie) and one other pint. The Chair commented thus on the toilets: "Spectacular domed architecture - light plays on the walls". Then the meeting went sightseeing by the river and in the castle. A bus was taken back to Market Drayton, where, contrary to the Good Beer Guide, the pubs did not open until 7 p.m. The interim period was occupied by visiting a Pie and Space Invaders shop and church, then at 7 p.m. members joined thirsty locals in the "SANDBROOK VAULTS" for 1 rapid pint of McEwans before rejoining the bus. Returning to Newcastle under Lyme, the Chair was reluctant to spend time in the Bus Station, so the meeting retired to the "OLD BROWN JUG" for 1 pint of Pedigree. Then they returned to Keele for beefburgers and the ("KRA BAR"), where the Sec's birthday was being celebrated. The proceedings continued in Z10 where Pedigree in bottles was consumed, and it is recorded in some sources that the SAR was not very well at this juncture.

96. 10/05/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - KEELE: Convened by Chair; present SAR, First Lady B, Second Lady A. Convened about half a minute before closing time at the "SNEYD ARMS". Chair's idea. Sandwiches and Lager/Guinness were had. The Chair explained the Salt Lake City road system to the SAR, and then they went for a walk.

97. /05/81 LONDON SE1 - SOUTHWARK: Convened by Chair; present WPR, IQ. The meeting took place on a Tuesday in the "GEORGE", where the party got drunk and went to the "ANCHOR".

98. /05/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by WPR; present Chair, First Lady B, REG and friends Martin and John ("Hand in Hand" only), Rick, Aardvark-Bong and John ("Hand in Hand" only). The meeting began in the "ALEXANDRA" and then went up the hill to the "HAND IN HAND" and met REG and his party. The meeting became unconstitutional for a few minutes when the Chair and First Lady B left but became reconstitutional when Rick, Aardvark-Bong and John (no relation) arrived, in a state of high excitement but little coherence.

99. 24/05/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by Chair; present SAR, WPR, First Lady B. The "ALEXANDRA", was again the venue, and 3 pints of Youngs bitter and 1 Martini and lemonade were had. The pub was not very crowded and various locals were reading Daltons Weekly. The SAR announced plans for a South American Field Trip. A piscatorial and crustaceological discussion, specifically related to astrological applications re: the SAR and Second Lady A, ensued.

100. 25/05/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by Rick; present SAR, Aardvark-Bong, John. As is often the case, Rick missed the previous meeting and convened this one at the "FOX AND GRAPES".

101. 04/07/81 CHESHIRE - CONGLETON: SAR, Sec, Alex, Kevin. The party bought "Staffordshire Potter" rail tickets and visited "YE OLDE KING'S HEAD", "THREE ARROWS", where the juke box was heard, and, due to the name of the pub, it was felt necessary to play darts. The Sec displayed dangerous incompetence in this game. "LION & BELL", "LION & SWAN" (girls and drunken skinhead), "STAFFORDSHIRE KNOT". On the ensuing walk back from Etruria, the Sec was spun on the roundabout on Keele Road.

102. 07/07/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - SILVERDALE: SAR, Sec, Alex, Kevin, Paul. "VINE". The party broke with normal Keele practice by heading across muddy fields to Silverdale. The Sec demonstrated telepathic powers by appearing unannounced at this meeting.

103. 09/07/81 LONDON WC1 - BLOOMSBURY: Convened by Sec; present SAR. The Sec took the SAR on a tour of his undergraduate drinking haunts: the "MOON" New North Road, and the "WHITE SWAN" New Row. He pointed out a Gothic fountain with which he had once been called upon to perform unnatural acts.

104. 12/07/81 SURREY - CARSHALTON: Convened by Chair; present SAR, First Lady B. "GREYHOUND", "RAILWAY", "SUN". A video game featuring VOGULS (not Vogons) was a major point.

105. 13/07/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by SAR; present Chair, WPR, Rick, First Lady B, Second Lady A. The personnel assembled at 49 Church Road and photos of the Chair trying to climb into a rubbish heap in Shrewsbury were inspected with curiosity. The SAR's mother questioned the Chair's integrity. Sangria was consumed. At the "DOG AND FOX" the game of "Mornington Crescent" was played, after which the WPR and Rick were entertained for coffee, and Rick was regaled with old tapes of his musical exploits.

106. 16/08/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by Rick; present Chair, SAR, WPR, Aardvark-Bong. The "ALEXANDRA" was the first venue, at which the first arrival was Rick, who was very into the Scrambler. Later Aardvark-Bong arrived and got into Heaven. Aardvark-Bong's arrival threw the meeting into confusion. The Chair explained that it would be best if he went out and re- entered, whereupon the SAR hospitably told him to get his own drink. A field trip to Avignon was proposed. A visit to McDonalds preceded research at the "SOUTH WESTERN", where there was much confusion due to a polar bear in the bar, and a lack of decision over who would purchase drinks. Appetizing salads were on display. Aardvark-Bong were still very into McDonalds, the need for which was represented on a graph against time. A number of subjects were discussed, viz. polar bears, the German for poison, which, it transpires, is "gift", the cheapness of Spanish drink, shaving beagles: the discussion was wide-ranging, intense, but some members thought, a touch unfocussed. The Italian race was roundly condemned. Members were unanimous in the opinion that their mutual mentors at KCS were maladjusted. Aardvark-Bong wished, privately, that he had a typewriter, his chosen means of communication with the masses. The physical properties of McDonald's hamburgers were discussed at length. The SAR tried a compatibility algorithm but got it wrong due to drink.

107. 28/08/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - NEWCASTLE-UNDER-LYME: SAR, Sec. The SAR accompanied the Sec on his leaving tour of Newcastle-under- Lyme, taking in the "CASTLE MONA", "BOAT & HORSES", "BLACK FRIAR" and "KING'S HEAD".

108. 02/09/81 STAFFORDSHIRE - KEELE: SAR, Sec. The Sec returned for his record player, and lunch was had at the "SNEYD ARMS".

109. 11/09/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by Rick; present SAR, REG, Jenny. The "CROOKED BILLET"; Rick had a romantic encounter with a former female acquaintance.

110. 13/09/81 ESSEX - LEIGH-ON-SEA/SOUTHEND-ON-SEA: Convened by SOS; present SAR. This meeting was preceded by a visit to a Baptist Church. After that, members took the train to Leigh-on-Sea and partook of refreshment in the "PETER BOAT". Then sightseeing took place at Hadleigh Castle, and early evening research was conducted in the "JOLLY FISHERMAN", right at the end of Southend Pier. Later on, a closing visit took place at the "DICKENS INN".

111. 14/09/81 LONDON WC2 - COVENT GARDEN: Convened by Chair; present SAR, WPR, Rick, REG, Anthony. The meeting opened, as is traditional, in the "MARQUIS OF ANGLESEY" and then adjourned to the Melati Restaurant for Indonesian food, and lots of it - in fact two meals in succession. The Chair had four helpings of Nasi Kuning in Chanel no. 5. The meeting terminated in the "AVENUE".

112. /10/81 LONDON NW1 - CAMDEN TOWN: Convened by WPR; present Chair, REG. The meeting was conceptually centered round Mornington Crescent, though no pubs worth visiting were found there per se. Members partook of Chudleys by way of drink, in the "HAWLEY ARMS".

113. 10/11/81 LONDON SW15 - PUTNEY: Convened by Rick; present Chair, SAR. The meeting was deemed to open at 6.30 at the "PRINCE OF WALES" (Courage), and Rick arrived late re time, having watched Grange Hill, to find the Chair and WPR discussing flying into and out of Heathrow, and drinking Courage Best Bitter. He joined in with the latter, if not the former. The "SPOTTED HORSE"; Here Young's bitter was consumed, as was a sausage (by the WPR). The design in the carpet, previously unnoticed by Rick, led to a discussion of a chicken-or-egg nature concerning the carpet and the name of the pub. Rick meanwhile pumped a considerable amount of money into the tank battle video game, and was rewarded by gaining top score. A break to satisfy hunger ensued, involving a visit to the Taj Mahal Restaurant in Upper Richmond Road. The "CASTLE"; This is one of the few pubs in Putney not previously visited by any member of the Society, and the reason was discovered immediately on entry (which took some time), for, despite the Young's bitter on sale, it proved to be a veritable tip. The company found a table after a while, and proceeded to play at beer mat catching. Rick also introduced a current catch phrase into the Society: "Never in my life and experience have I seen owt like it. Eeooh!". The "HORSESHOE"; Scene of telepathic experimentation some years previously. The Watney's stigma hangs around still, although Stag is a quite acceptable beer. The WPR immediately ran up a high score on the video machine, which Rick spent large sums in an unsuccessful attempt to match. It was now closing time, and the party went to Putney Station, East Putney Station and West Hill respectively.

114. 06/12/81 SURREY - KINGSTON: Convened by SAR; present Chair, WPR, Pete, Alex. "KINGSTON MILL", "RAM". Alex was heard to express the opinion that the rate of drinking of the Society (even the Chair) was slow, but it should be pointed out that he has been unemployed in Hartlepool.

115. 16/12/81 FIFE - DUNFERMLINE: Convened by WPR; present SAR. "PITBAUCHLIE HOTEL", "COTTAGE INN", "JOKER". The meeting was convened by telephone by the WPR, who seemed unsure where he was, but suggested Dunfermline Station to meet. He turned up half an hour late with a pronounced limp, having endured a fall in the snow. He set out to drive round all the streets of Dunfermline which frustrated the SAR, who wanted a drink. After a session in his hotel and two bars near by, the WPR was given the constitutional right not to bother holding any more meetings in Dunfermline, least of all in winter.

116. 27/12/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by Rick; present SAR, John, Hugh, Fiona. The "BREWERY TAP", "HAND IN HAND". The meeting then adjourned to Montana Road, and on the way back at 2 a.m., the SAR and Rick discovered they had both been dreaming about gas stoves.

117. 28/12/81 LONDON SW19 - WIMBLEDON: Convened by WPR; present SAR, Second Lady A. The "ALEXANDRA"; The game of "Kensington" featured prominently.

118. 29/12/81 LONDON SW18 - WANDSWORTH: Convened by Rick; present SAR, Second Lady A, Jan and Helen. The venue was the "BREWERY TAP" and Rick introduced Jan and Helen as being 50 per cent of "That Red Stuff", an essentially somnolent rock band. Interesting coincidences were noted between Helen and the Second Lady A's brother.

119. 30/12/81 LONDON SW3 - CHELSEA: Convened by SAR; present WPR, Rick, Second Lady A. This meeting was preceded by a cinematographic convocation of an Arthurian nature. The meeting proper took place in the "CADOGAN ARMS" Kings Road, and the "KING'S ARMS" Sloane Square.