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In Memory of Mister Rogers (Fred Rogers) 1928-2003. When all the world was insane you were always there and always kind and accepting simply because I was once a little girl 4-7 years old.


All works on this website hold a valid Library of Congress Copyright (C) 2000. No rights to republish without my permission! These works are a combination of my informal essays describing my story of child abuse, child neglect, rape, abuse by physicians, physical sickness, the destruction of a child's life through untreated and undiagnosed illness, the ultimate consequences and domestic violence. Up to this day, I have not received a complete diagnosis and the damage to my face and body has never been repaired. However, due to my extreme youth at the time of the illness, which lasted in its most severe form from age almost 16 to 19, a lot of the initial damage has become relatively minor. Some damage remains and I still dream of having it repaired. However, my life circumstances do not allow for any repairs. This website progresses as a true story, so start reading from the top down, i.e. #1 and then on. I plan to add works to this site almost daily, so please check in often. Please remember to sign my guestbook or forum ( great for longer messages)!

Please backspace (hit the "back" option)out of my forum for now. I can't seem to figure out how to change the "home" option to bring readers back to my homepage as they exit my forum. Thanks!




 



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01 The Beginning
02 What Happened
03 I Went On
04 Life Went On
05 The Queen Druggy
06 Doctor M.
07 Missing the Mark
08 17th Birthday
09 Post 17th Birthday
10 Confused
11 I Persisted
12 The BIG beautiful day!
13 After Dr. "J"
14 The New Beginning
15 Up and Away
16 Once Home
17 It Was Really Over
18 The Rabbi
19 Early College Days
20 College Continues
21 Introduction to Relationships
22 What Love Is
23 Squeezing By
24 The Counselor
25 Processing It All
26 One Day
27 A Little Tiny Partial Diagnosis
28 Reflections

Backtracking to the time before the illness. These are some stories about the time before and my reactions to things that both happened and were my reality: Work number 31 is another reflection from after the sickness.
29 Life Before the Sickness
30 The Shop Teacher Accused/Missing The Mark
31 What the Sickness and Abuse Taught Me
32 The Reign of 8th Grade
33 The Boarding School & Back to page 1
34 9th Grade Over and Over Again
35 The Other Two Doctors
36 TMJ Again

Essay Work Number 36 is the end of my backtracking for now..

37 The Truth About Jim
38 The Third TMJ Doctor
39 Sardonic Art
40 Self-Awareness
41 The Second Dr. "L"
42 Learning to Act Like a Flake
43 The Entrance of Ted
44 The Rare Times Told
45 The Child Abuse Scapegoat
46 When Child Abuse Becomes Permission
47 Back in School Once Again
48 The Biggest Coward
49 Coming Soon
50 Coming Soon
51 Coming Soon
52 Coming Soon
53 Coming Soon
54 Coming Soon
55 Coming Soon
56 Coming Soon
57 Coming Soon
58 Coming Soon


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