Great spirits of the Earth and the Ocean.
Great spirits of the sun and the sky.
Allow us passage to good living space.

We will be grateful and offer our time and effort toward beautifying the surroundings.
I offer my hair as a sacrifice. I offer tobacco. I offer prayer feathers.

May the Great Spirit move through everything to guide us effortlessly to our chosen place.

Thank you, Spirit of the East - may you carry the message on the wind.
Thank you, Spirit of the South - may the message be heard by the right ears.
Thank you, Spirit of the West - may the message that is heard be understood.
Thank you, Spirit of the North - may the message achieve its goal of materializing.

So it must be and it harms none
blessed be

The other place we found, a mobile home, produced �Hera� (Goddess) from dictionary divination.
Medecine cards drawn: bat #42 (4+2=6) rebirth
Wolf #15 (1+5=6) loyalty & teaching

What kind of medecine will the mobile home bring? Butterfly #9 transformation

We will be starting anew again. This feels more like starting over than when I got back to canada when I was pregnant. Maybe it�s because we hadn�t �suffered� together yet back then. I wouldn�t really call it suffer; it would be more like an experience. It was at our financial expense. The emotions can be described as ripped-off-ness, joy at having met really cool folks, the lesson of trusting one�s intuition about first impressions upon meeting someone for the first time. The lesson of when to reduce the generosity, of not being too generous to the wrong people (those that take more than they give - roommates that use our stuff and don�t replace it) a friend called it �setting up one�s personal boundaries.� Having to know how to get a message across to a person that isn�t willing to listen in the first place. It was too hard to stay grounded with all that excess clutter of organizing finances and petty roommate bullshit.
We are starting all over, except that we have a bit more social wisdom than when we started. We�ll get our bearings finally.
My throat chakra is opening up because I�m learning how to communicate; I still shy away from direct confrontation about heavy emotional. . . even when I�m writing I probably string my sentences in an incomprehensible. . . although I think that only because I wasn�t understood because I�d try to talk to the wrong people; it�s like I was trying to screw myself by wasting energy on the wrong people. Why do I keep thinking that the Leo has to talk to me so that the �cosmic link� can be. . . I�m having a hard time finding the right words. . . it�s like if he talks to me, there would be a change in our society between the �human world� and the �natural world�, the left and right brains becoming harmonious. I believe that I�ve been speaking the truth but was never acknowledged by him. Why does it matter? Why do I want that person�s friendship so much? Most people would call me a sucker for punishment. That lesson of not wasting one�s energy on unappreciative people. Why make tomato soup for someone who doesn�t like tomatoes?

My dream: we had to climb and hike and walk a long time to get to someone�s place, where we were all meeting to go to a show. My partner goes on his bike to drop off a back pack and we had to meet him at the show. We headed to the bar where the show was. It was crowded. Everyone I was with dispersed so I sat alone for a while at my table then went looking for a cigarette to borrow. I found my partner sitting at a table with a girl whose boobs were exposed. That was ok until she started talking all condescendingly which was not ok. I said to my mate �come on� he didn�t and I got mad. The band had quit playing by then and the bar was closing.

My partner�s dream: his brother was driving to go visit some friends of his. They were driving in the dark on a long trip. They got to a huge city where the highways intertwine. They drove around looking for a place. After they found it they had to go upstairs, down a long hallway, more stairs, more halls until they got outside where a group of people were hanging out. A big guy who acted like he was in charge ordered in a joking manner �let�s play �catch the flag�!� my partner didn�t want to play and the guy goes to him, �everybody plays!� he still didn�t want to play and he went to sit next to me but I had sat on the only bare spot in a flowerbed. He didn�t like the guy who was still yelling, �everybody plays or you leave!� he was just playing and kidding around but my partner left anyway to go back to the room.

Our son�s dream: he dreamed that our new place looked like the place we left in Vancouver, he was riding his bike outside and he came in the door and it still looked like our old place in Vancouver.

East - Dog: the inner core, the seed idea is out of loyalty and how to care for someone who�s hurt. South - Lynx upside-down�: what I have to do is not talk about my seed idea too much. West - Puma: I want to take this course so I can be more comfortable in survival jobs and so I can know what to do when an emergency happens. No panic. North - Deer: the course would help me learn to help folks with love and to not be afraid.

The person is balanced about dualities; (s)he may look young and awkward, even humorous, but (s)he holds the knowledge of the eternal dance of dualities.

Along comes a Queen to alter the initial balance with her big fancy cup.

Maybe she used to be a knight who held a smaller cup and kept the flowing waters of intuition at a greater distance.

Maybe she wants to share the beauty so everyone can see it; maybe she�s hoping to achieve personal bounty because it�s good to start with ten cups and a breathtaking rainbow.

She knows that if she keeps doing whatever it is that she�s doing, she�ll be sitting comfortably with a display of nine cups.

She has the power to acknowledge and accept the �darker� forces; the beauty and bounty of intuitive intellect are achieved through that. It is the ability to not get shackled by obsessions that returns the pentacle right side up.

Because accepting the �dark� side is contrary still in our society, I always seem to want to change things because changing is a metaphoric death.

Sacrifice? To what? I dunno. Maybe if I try to change things too much then I would be sacrificing what was supposed to happen?

I fear the act of battling, even pretend kind of fighting. Hitting five sticks is like arguing my way out of a paper bag.

What will culminate is the sharing of cups. Sharing of emotions. Sharing intuitive knowledge. These two cups complement the first card of dualities. It�s also my inner dualities coalescing into a separate whole.

The moon is getting fuller and so are my boobs. It�s 4 a.m. and I can�t sleep. Of course by 9 a.m. I�ll be somnolent. I thought about the Great Goddess and her One. I thought about the Leo, I don�t know if he�s who or what he thinks he is. Some teacher he turned out to be. Well, the only thing I really wanted to learn from him was herbology. Why did someone like him get to live on a Native reserve and get teachings from real elders? Is what I said to him really true about how the ones who need to be shown the most get the teachers? My teachers come in weird packages, like the Great Goddess/Durga/White Buffalo. I really love her. She never harshed out on me. I guess I thought the Leo would be kind of the same. During the early stage of our art venture he pushed me but I needed that. When we finally escaped the roommate hell that he was fully aware of and moved on the same property he lived on, he distanced himself from me. Why do I pine for his friendship? Why is it so important? I don�t think he ever took me seriously. Even my spirit writings, the words �that�s good� came out of his mouth but I don�t think he took it seriously. But then he meets a drunken old native man and believes he has shaman energy. Sure, he might have been a shaman in a different life but doesn�t the fact that he�s wasted kind of indicate his level of fortitude? Why couldn�t the Leo see me, right next to him; I�m not wasted and I never really bothered to get addicted to anything even though the world was unfair to me too. I just kept right on trying to figure myself out. I believe I�m �stronger� than that drunken old fool, nice as he might have been. And the Leo is an even bigger fool for missing that. He carved a beautiful work dedicated to the women�s power to speak their minds but I don�t think he really believes it because that work was only inspired by a woman he had sex with. Why am I bothered by his ineptitudes?
I miss the Great Goddess. I hope she didn�t give up hope with me too. I just want a medecine person to help re-enforce me. I want to do rituals but it�s boring alone. I�m probably not strong enough to raise energy by myself. That�s probably why I miss the Goddess. The Leo has that too; he told me of an outdoor ritual for Earth healing he did with his friends. And I know we could raise even more energy than me and a friend whom I danced a sacred Earth dance with for a couple that were tripping on acid. We can raise even more energy than me and the Goddess. That�s probably why I�ve always been drawn to him. I was sexually attracted to him, is that what screwed him up? Did he really expect me to follow through my fantasy behind my partner�s back?

I�m glad I didn�t because it would definitely would not have been worth it.

I hope my loyalty to the Great Goddess isn�t just because she compliments me on my �ritual ability�. I am kind of a sucker for that, I guess, mostly because it�s a pat on the back for something no one really knows about. I can�t be criticized too much while I�m learning something new or I lose gumption.

Maybe it�s good that the Leo goes away. Maybe he does suck. Maybe he�s actually one of the �dark ones� without even knowing it.
Well, I hope I meet a �shining one� or two soon, I know my mate and son are shining but they�re not into rituals, they�re into simply being.

Someone is working at making money but since it�s upside down, a lot of the money falls out. (Minimum wage - work a lot and not get the same in return) ace of pentacles.

The four winds of change and the world is the obstacle.

I want to learn the �game� of social interaction, five wands.

I have my self doubt but it can be easily reversed, I shouldn�t worry too much, nine swords.

I passed through my �world against me� trip but not completely (Upside down), seven wands.

I�ll need to get back to my studies and introspect a little more (Upside down), page of cups.

I have to hold my cup like a queen.

I see lots of neat realities and gifts from the spirit world during my daily life, seven cups.

I hope to interact, share knowledge with some people; maybe I�m also afraid of same, two cups.

Life is a journey, no matter what you do, even if you�re not looking, six swords.

page of pentacles
page of swords
death underneath
star revealed

One card reading about our threesome idea with Isis:
Empress (initiative, action, clandestine)She is beautiful and a Goddess.

East - Hawk: messenger
South - Bighorn: challenge
West - Horse: power
North - Elk: stamina
Above - Opossum: diversion
Below - Heron: grace
Within - Fox: camouflage

Left - Dolphin: Manna
Right - Eagle: Spirit

East - Moose: self esteem
South - Snake: transmutation
West - Dolphin: Manna
North - Eagle: Spirit
Above - Bighorn: challenge
Below - Owl: observation
Within - Horse: power

Left - Badger: aggression
Right - Wolf: teacher

Sometimes couples get the itch to try new sexual venues. An open-minded friend really helps.

I extend my invitation to our close friend to join us. Hold hands and lock eyes together �love, lust life . . . love lust life.� Kiss deeply, tongues twisting and lashing, hands exploring quivering, shivering torso, skin so smooth, so soft, further explore the physical point of divine touch where the throbbing clitoris awaits the eager tongue. The psychic pulling is becoming unbearable and soon I cannot control myself. I take my dress off and kneel down in front of her beautiful pussy. As my tongue touches her clit, the primal energy travels through my body down to my own point of divine touch, making me shudder and climb another level of fervent passion. The rich aroma of her sex is intoxicating, it makes me want more. I present my behind to my partner while I caress and suck her hot little bud. We are united, the three of us, in a triplicate embrace of orgasmic dimensions. The love and the trust are immense.

I made a small movement and a ripple ensued. My move was insisting to my boss that he must recycle the tin and plastic and glass that would otherwise be tossed. Apparently fast food places haven�t been recycling all this time. Well, I won�t work for a place that desecrates Our Ma like that. So the restaurant now recycles and the boss got himself four pigs to consume the scraps.
My small movement will �ripple� across the business world.
It freaks me out.

There�s some undeveloped land close to our home that needs protection. The spirits need to be roused up. Can one person move enough energy to wake them up? It�s a powerful spot. Everyone agrees except the people who own it.

I hear the horn of judgement,
the monarchy falls from their tower,
Temperance is needed to be a leader.