FUNNY CLASSIFIEDS:
These Are Actual Classifieds That Appeared In Local And National Newspapers!
===============================================================
FUNNY CLASSIFIEDS
=====================================================================
For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers
=====================================================================
Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
=====================================================================
Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to
take home, too.
=====================================================================
Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
=====================================================================
Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
=====================================================================
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
=====================================================================
For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
=====================================================================
For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy.
=====================================================================
Great Dames for sale.
=====================================================================
Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
=====================================================================
Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
=====================================================================
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
=====================================================================
Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
=====================================================================
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim
in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
=====================================================================
The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other
athletic facilities.
=====================================================================
Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
=====================================================================
Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates.
Automatically burns toast.
=====================================================================
Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots
of women wear nothing else.
=====================================================================
Stock up and save. Limit: one.
================================================================
We build bodies that last a lifetime.
================================================================
For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
================================================================
Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References
required.
================================================================
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
================================================================
Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
================================================================
Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
================================================================
Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play.
================================================================
Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
================================================================
Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
================================================================
3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.
================================================================
Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals,
and smacks included.
================================================================
Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
================================================================
Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll
never go anywhere again.
================================================================
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
Start Your Week Off With A Bang! Visit Free Cool Jokes!
Disclaimer
Contents collected from the Internet and personal resources. For your entertainment and amusement only and is not meant to insult anyone.
