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Girl- "Can I have a bead?"
Wally- "You have to earn them."
10 Minutes Later: Wally- "Then the boobs started flyin'."
"Should I fart so they go away?" -Eli
Wally- "I walked into your room to steal your comforter and you rolled
over and you were pitching a tent."
Bruce- "No I wasn't. I'm not a boner boy, I swear!"
"I hate beating off in the shower because it hurts the next time I pee." -Bruce
"I need some hate music." -Bruce
"I just used the rag!" -Bruce
OFFICIAL LINE OF MB'01:
"HA HA......POUN!" -Bruce (followed by everyone)
"If I had a pool in my backyard, all the water would pour out because it would be on a hill." -Matt Schuh
"My grandma is in a wheel chair. She's not handicap or anything...she's just old." -Kevin Helmick
"What does this mean?!?!" -Kevin Helmick
"It's the grip of stupidity." -Matt Schuh
"Hey! Why did you hang up? That girl sounded hot!" -Matt Schuh
"Hey, I'm gay. Convince me not to be." -Kevin Helmick
"Hey baby, you wanna shake it?" -Tom Schiller
"Hey Mom, I'm gonna go have sex." -Kevin Helmick
"Oh, SSCHILLLLLLAAA!" -Craig Deno, then everyone
"I'll have a Caesar with Ranch." -J.P. Broerman
"I know I hit the break." -Luke Schafer
"Led Zeppelin was a fucking blimp from fucking World War II!" -Phil Zinda
J.P.- "This is a survey."
Lady- "How did you get this number? This is supposed to be unlisted."
Matt- "CAUSE THIS IS A PRANK YOU MORON!!!"
"People are stupid." - Matt Schuh
"You ASS!" - Tom Schiller
"I like having you around...fuck, you!" -Lauren Gray
"Maybe he was looking at a corn girl." (followed by corn girl dance and noises) -D.J.
"I don't care...I'm dirty, too." -Marc Pupillo
"It just went up there. That's 'cause there is no flap." -Arnold Pashi
"Oh God. I blocked your shot." -Shaggy Schultz
"I just wanted to get back to be naked and have sex a couple of times." -Zach Wright
Erin- "I have like twenty pages to read."
Tom- "Just scan it."
Erin- "But I don't have a scanner."
Christy- "I had a fish, but it kept dieing."
Erin- "It did."
"Sometimes I just wish I could make my own alcohol...how great would that be?" -Kevin Helmick
"Oh, I am so NOT Beck...you bitch!" -Kevin Helmick
"I'm true." -Kevin Helmick
"Schiller is the blackie. Just tell him Beck said it." -Kevin Helmick
D.J.- "Dude, you broke my dishwasher!"
Kevin- "Dude, I broke my back!"
Here is a "mathematical equation" from Kevin Helmick:
Schiller = Markus
Kevin = Toothpick
D.J. + J.P = anal rape
together = Sabian
= walkie talkie ---> cell phone ---> mercury sable = immunity
"You bitch...mmm hahaha mmmm!" -Kevin Helmick
"You know when that stripper came to my house and she was smacking our asses with a belt, yeah well there was this one kid who had toilet paper stuck in his butt...it was weird." -Kevin Helmick
"My eye is getting better occasionally." -D.J.
"You are really AaNnOOooYyIiNnGg!!!" -Kevin Helmick
"Yeah, [you look] asleep with a soccer ball on your balls ... EWWWWWW!!!!" -D.J.
"Playing with the ball in the back is like playing with your own ass ... you just don't do it." -Greg Trosper
"We should drill a hole in the floor and fart in it." -D.J.
Coach Ridenour - "You've got some shit in your ear."
D.J. - "Shaggy put it there."
"Well today, I went out to have a smoke and this dude I don�t know starts laughing. He said last night I came out to smoke, and there were eight girls and this one dude. And I go, 'God damn, this is a pussy-fest, not a sausage-fest, a pussy fest!' And then I asked a girl for muff!!!" -Kevin Helmick
"Hey, we could go to UNO. It's kind of like ONU...but backwards." -Marc Pupillo
"The junior bacon cheeseburger: after you eat three of them you are full of bacony goodness."
-Marc Pupillo
"I wouldn't drink from the bucket, because you know at some point that there was a mop in there. I don't want any moppy beer." -Marc Pupillo
"My junk...I need some pussy." -Marc Pupillo
D.J. - "What type of pattern is this?"
Tom Schiller - "Yellow."
"It was on all of the mannequins. And I am usually up for whatever they are wearing." -D.J.
"What's up with Dracula over there?" -Aaron Lecklider
"Get out of my house...grlbgrlbgrlbgrlbgrlb!" -Aaron Lecklider
"Are you girls here for the tournament?" -Brandon Hurt
"You sure you love her?" -Aaron Lecklider (to a guy about to get married)
Opposing player- "Why are you guys all cheering him on?"
Josh Lance- "We only put him against teams that suck."
"DUNLOP!!!" -D.J. and Aaron Lecklider
"Weird...so maybe this is what it is like to NOT be completely hammered our of your mind." -Marc Pupillo
"The only way they look the same is their skin color." -Tom Schiller
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