SUICIDE
"A permanent solution to a temporary problem"
Have you ever thought of committing suicide or even attempted suicide? Do you know someone that has or is wanting to? Are you just wanting to learn a little more about it? Whatever the case is, you've come to the right place. I've been there. I can relate and am willing to help.
If you have thoughts of suicide, these options are available to you.
- Call 1-800-SUICIDE
- Check yourself into the emergency room
- Tell someone who can help you find help immediately
Most people can be treated with a combination of antidepressant medication and psychotherapy. A suicidal person urgently needs to see a doctor or psychiatrist and may need to go to an inpatient setting at a psychiatric unit.
SUICIDE Danger Signs:
·TALKING about it---I know there are people that think that others who talk about it usually don’t follow through with it, but I am telling you now… majority of the time that is their last cry for help. They may talk indirectly hoping that you will stop them.
You should ALWAYS take a threat seriously!!!
·Preoccupation with death
·Comments about worthlessness, hopelessness, and helplessness
·Loss of interest in once enjoyed things
· “It is calmer before the storm” They become calmer and seem to be
happier
·Visiting or calling loved ones and friends
·Giving away belongings
*Previous suicide attempts
*Self destructive acts
*Recent loss or crisis
*Use or increased use of substances
*Sudden dramatic decline/improvement in academic performance, chronic truancy, running away
*Physical symptoms such as eating disturbances, sleeplessness or excessive sleeping, stomachaches/headaches, menstrual irregularities, apathetic appearance
*Acute personality changes, aggressiveness, moodiness, unusual withdrawal
High risk children:
- Are preoccupied with death, and don't understand its permanency.
- Believe a person goes to a better place after dying or can come alive after dying.
- Are impulsive (act w/out realizing the consequences of their actions).
- Have no sense of fear or danger.
- Have perfectionist tendencies.
- Truly feel that it would be better for everyone if they were dead.
- Believe that if they could join a loved one who died, they would then be rid of their pain and be at peace.
- Speak of death in a positive way rather than negative; think that death might be pleasant.
- Have parents or relatives who have attempted suicide (modeling behaviors/genetic factors)
- Are hopeless; feeling that things will never get better, that they will never feel better.
If you think a child may be suicidal…
- Ask questions about suicide like, "Do you ever…
- have thoughts of hurting yourself?
- feel so badly that you have thoughts of dying?
- wish you could runaway or disappear?
- wish you could go to sleep and not wake up?
- have scary dreams about dying?
What you can do if a friend or loved one is suicidal:
Remain Neutral but concerned:
Begin a dialogue by asking questions. Suicidal thoughts are common with depressive illnesses and your willingness to talk about it in a nonjudgmental way can be the push a person needs to get help. Questions to ask:
“Do you ever feel so badly that you think of suicide?”
“Do you have a plan?”
“Do you know when you would do it (today, next week)?"
“Do you have access to what you would use?”
Asking these questions will allow you to determine if your friend is in immediate danger, and get help if needed. A suicidal person should see a doctor or psychiatrist immediately. Calling 911 or going to a hospital emergency room are valid options. Always take thoughts of or plans for suicide seriously.
Never keep a plan for suicide a secret. Don’t worry about endangering a friendship if you truly feel a life is in danger. It's better to regret something you did, than something you didn't do to help a friend.
Don't try to minimize problems or shame a person into changing her mind. Your opinion of a person's situation is irrelevant. Trying to convince a person it's not that bad, or that she has everything to live for will only increase her feelings of guilt and hopelessness. Reassure her help is available, that depression is treatable, and that suicidal feelings are temporary.
If you feel the person isn't in immediate danger, acknowledge the pain as legitimate and offer to work together to get help. Make sure you follow through. Help find a doctor or a mental health professional, participate in making the first phone call, or go along to the first appointment. If you're in a position to help, don't assume that your persistence is unwanted or intrusive. Risking your feelings to help save a life is a risk worth taking.
- Treatment might include:
- Depression Inventory Scales, Suicidal Risk Assessments, Suicidal Intent Scales, Degree of Hopelessness Scales, Diagnostic Interview Questionnaires.
- Psychotherapy:
- Cognitive Therapy – teaches more positive thinking, coping skills and problem-solving
- Interpersonal Therapy – might teach children how to make friends
- Group Therapy – with others of similar age that have a depressive illness
- Family Therapy – works with the entire family and discusses various family dynamics
- Various supports at school. Talk with a school nurse about the options.
- Various forms of play therapy, relaxation therapy, biofeedback, visualization
- Antidepressant medications, stimulants, also some types of alternative medicine
- 24 Hour Home Supervision
- Hospitalization
How to Help:
-
Educate yourself on childhood & adolescent depressive illnesses and suicide.
-
Assure the child he/she can feel better, that suicidal thoughts are only temporary, & that there are people who can help her.
- Always take suicidal tendencies seriously and respond immediately.
- Know that early intervention is the key to successful treatment for children who suffer from depressive illnesses.
- Understand that treatment should be a team-approach including a psychotherapist, a child psychiatrist, parents, relatives, caregivers, school personnel, friends, neighbors and other significant people in the child’s life.
Have you ever heard someone say (or may have said your self)..."If a person is determined to kill him/herself, nothing is going to stop him/her. They will do it eventually." Well, this may be a surprise, but this is so untrue!!!!!!!!!
Even the most severely depressed person has mixed feelings about death, wavering until the very last moment between wanting to live and wanting to die. Most suicidal people do not want death; they want the pain to stop. The impulse to end it all, however overpowering, does not last forever.
*If you are the person thinking about suicide try out the ICARE MODEL.........
"ICARE" Model ***Example
I learned about the ICARE Model and found it useful when facing suicidal thoughts. Maybe you can too.
Identify. Identify the trigger, specific thought and the underlying core belief. Write the thought/belief down. **Trigger: "Fight with mom, boyfriend, wife" Belief: "I thought I was worthless and didn't deserve to live"
Connect the thought to the distortion. Identify the distortion inherent to the belief. ***Catastrophizing, "No one loves me, everybody hates me" "I always screw up"
Assess (evaluate) the thought/belief. 1. What is the evidence for/against the belief? ***"He may have said some mean things because she was so upset"/ "Now that I think about it, I have done a lot of things n my life. I'm a good friend. 2. Are there other possible reasons/explanations for the situation/circumstance? **"He may have been having a bad day and just took it out on me and I took it the wrong way" 3. What is the worst thing that could happen? The Best thing that could happen? The most likely thing? ***"He could be mad the rest of the night. He'll probably be fine tomorrow" 4. Will it matter in a year? ***"I won't even remember next week"
Restructure. Restate the belief after having effectively evaluated it. What is a more reasonable alternative belief once the distortion has been removed and the belief decatastrophized? What are the advantages of giving up the dysfunctional suicidal belief identified? ***"I'm not worthless, just upset that my boyfriend said some things and hurt my feelings. I'll get over it and we'll make up as always. There is no reason to want to kill myself. I already feel better just thinking about it"
Execute (respond). Act as though the new belief were true. Choose a behavior consistent with the new belief. ***"When my boyfriend get back I'm going to ask him to sit down and talk to figure out what the real problem is. I am going to assertively explain how I feel using I statements and apologize for the hurtful things that I said."
******If you/loved one are in the initial stages you/loved one should seek help from a professional in your area to help further your recovery********
Facts:
The number one cause of suicide is
depression that went untreated
Over 30,000 deaths from suicide
occur each year nationally
Only 30% of depressed people
actually seek help
Only 15% of them are correctly
diagnosed appropriately treated
Suicide ranks as the THIRD leading cause of death for ages 15 - 24 and
FOURTH leading cause of death for ages 10 - 14.
Suicide is the SECOND leading cause of death for college students
Each week, we lose approximately 100 or more youth to suicide in our nation.
More teenagers and young adults died of suicide than from cancer, AIDS, heart disease, birth defects, stroke, pneumonia and influenza, and chronic lung disease COMBINED
Males are four times more likely to die from suicide than are females. However, females are more likely to attempt suicide than are males.
Suicide rates increase with age and are highest among Americans aged 65 years and older.
More people die from suicide than from homicide
***BOOKS FOR YOU TO READ: Depression, Suicide, & Disorders****
Adults:
Understanding
Depression - A Complete Guide to Its Diagnosis & Tx. By
Donald F. Klein
Questions & Answers About Depression and Its
Treatment By Ivan K. Goldberg, M.D.
Overcoming Depression By Demitri
Papolos, M.D. & Janice Papolos
The Broken Brain By Nancy Andreasen,
M.D.
You Mean I Don't Have to Feel This Way
By Colette Dowling
On the Edge of Darkness By Kathy
Cronkite
Triumph Over Fear By Jerilynn Ross
Undoing Depression - What Therapy Doesn’t Teach
You and Medication Can’t Give You
By Richard O’Connor, Ph.D.
Choosing To Live - How to Defeat Suicide Through
Cognitive Therapy By Thomas E. Ellis,
Change Your Brain, Change Your Life
By Daniel G. Amen, M.D.
When Going Through Hell….Don’t Stop!
By Douglas Bloch
Surviving Schizophrenia By E. Fuller Torrey, M.D.
Children & Adolescents:
No One Saw My Pain - Why Teens Kill Themselves
By Andrew Slaby, M.D.
Helping Your Depressed Teenager - A Guide for
Parents & Caregivers By Gerald D. Oster,
Helping Your Depressed Child - A Reassuring Guide
to the Causes & Treatments of Childhood & Adolescent Depression
By Lawrence L. Kearns, M.D.
It's Nobody's Fault - New Hope and Help for
Difficult Children and Their Parents By Harold S. Koplewicz, M.D.
Depression in the Young – What We Can Do to Help
Them By Trudy Carlson
Sad Days, Glad Days By DeWitt
Hamilton (a storybook for children about depression)
When Nothing Matters Anymore: A Survival Guide for
Depressed Teens By Bev Cobain
Depression - Challenge the Beast Within
Yourself and Win By Cait Irwin
Suicide
Night
Falls Fast By Kay Redfield Jamison
Suicide: Survivors - A Guide for Those Left Behind
By Adina Wrobleski
Suicide: Why? By Adina Wrobleski
Suicide: The Forever Decision - For Those Thinking About
Suicide, and For Those Who Know, Love, or Counsel Them By
Paul G. Quinnett
Suicide: Intervention & Therapy - Undoing the
Forever Decision By Paul G. Quinnett
Preventing Youth Suicide - A Handbook for Educators
& Human Service Professionals
By Marcia L. McEvoy and Alan W. McEvoy
Child Survivors of Suicide: A Guidebook for Those Who
Care for Them By Rebecca Parkin
Suicide Survivors' Handbook By Trudy
Carlson
The Tender Land: A Family Love Story By
Kathleen Finneran
After Suicide By John Hewitt
Why Suicide? By Eric Marcus
No One Saw My Pain - Why Teens Kill Themselves
By Andrew Slaby,
Bart Speaks Out – Breaking the Silence on Suicide; an
interactive storybook/workbook for children By Linda Goldman,
M.S.
When Nothing Matters Anymore: A Survival Guide for
Depressed Teens By Bev Cobain
Choosing To Live – How to Defeat Suicide Through
Cognitive Therapy By Thomas E. Ellis,
Autobiographies
An
Unquiet Mind By Kay Redfield Jamison
Darkness Visible - A Memoir of Madness By
William Styron
The Beast - A Reckoning with Depression
By Tracy Thompson
A Brilliant Madness By Patty Duke
Conquering the Beast Within By Cait
Irwin
Grief After Suicide
Suicide:
Survivors - A Guide for Those Left Behind By Adina Wrobleski
Child Survivors of Suicide: A Guidebook for Those Who
Care for Them
By Rebecca Parkin with Karen Dunne-Maxim
Suicide Survivors' Handbook By Trudy
Carlson
After Suicide By John Hewitt
Tragedy to Triumph By Reuel Nygaard
A Grief Observed By C.S. Lewis
My Son, My Son By Iris Bolton
Healing After the Suicide of a Loved One
By Ann Smolin, C.S.W. and John Guinan, Ph.D.
The Grieving Child: A Parent's Guide By
Helen Fitzgerald
When Dinosaurs Die - A Guide to Understanding Death
(a storybook for children)
By Laurie Krasny Brown & Marc Brown
Helping Children Grieve By Theresa Huntley
Talking about Death: A Dialogue between Parent and
Child By Earl A. Grollman
The Suicide of My Son - A Story of Childhood
Depression By Trudy Carlson
Bart Speaks Out – Breaking the Silence on Suicide;
an interactive storybook/workbook for children By Linda Goldman, M.S.
But I Didn't Say Goodbye By Barbara Rubel
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