THE END TIMES

VOLUME III || ISSUE 3 || FEBRUARY 8, 2006

Masonic Lodge Controls Tunnels Under School!

Steroid Scandal Rocks JBU!

New Major to Be Offered

Talent Show Set to Amaze

Folf Named Official Sport

JBU to Host Reality Show

Board Approves New Mascot!

SOAPBOX:
JBU Outsourcing

Dear Phrank

Graduation Cancelled

To The Little Man

Other Little Things...

END TIMES HOME

Dear Phrank

Dear Phrank,

My roomate smells.

- Grossed Out in Walker

Dear Grossed Out,

Once at the college age, most people are set in their cleanliness habits. This leaves the responsibilty of her bad smell up to you. Try spraying your roomie with Lysol or FeBreeze. If that fails, hire a hitman and snag free �A�s while you�re at it.

[Ed. Note - killing your roomate is not a good idea or solution. Also, the free �A�s from the death of a roomate are only a legend and murder is frowned upon]

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Direct all questions and concerns to Mr. End Times Editor.