- David James
WHY? If you take this at face value, it just seems rather random. Why would anyone care to measure something in shrimp? Well, the truth is, it was very random, and the fact that it was said completely out of context is what made this quote go from funny to hilarious. One day while sitting around discussing various topics, John Effinger was jokingly asked "how big he was." Yes, we mean THAT. And David, not knowing anything about the question that had just been asked, turned and matter-of-factly stated "3/8 of a shrimp." That small, eh?
- Jon Day
WHY? This one began on an Independent Council trip to play lazer tag in Bloomington. Both Palak Pandya and Tina Flispart used their tickets from the lazer tag place to get small plastic horses. Since Jon collects cute little toys, and several were lost in the Rector fire, both girls decided to give their horses to him. On the ride home, as Jon was playing with them, he discovered the horses would stick together in such a way that they looked like they were mating. On top of this, one horse had a bubble of plastic in its stomach that Jon referred to as the fetus. And so, the quote was born. This quote was funny enough when Jon first said it, but the events that came after the quote, made it even better. A few weeks later, Jon was at Walmart adn won something quite interesting from the claw machine. At first, he was dismayed to discover all he had won was a cheap plastic Easter egg. However, upon inspection it was revealed that the egg contained a small plastic horse. The horses had finally had their baby! (And we all thought horses were mammals...)
- Jon Day
"There's on in my pants, too."
- Jeremy Jones
"I wasn't going to touch that one."
- Jon Day
WHY? This particular quote doesn't really have a story behind it, other than the fact that Jeremy really did have an envelope in his jacket, and when Jon said he "wan't going to touch that one," he didn't intentionally use the double-entendre. So, when everyone around burst out in laughter, Jon was the last to catch on.
- Chris Colvard
WHY? The first time Chris ever went into the SafeRide office, it didn't take him more than a minute to discover something quite strange about one of the pictures on the wall. There was this nice drawing, sponsored by Coca-Cola, of a 1950's diner, with several cars parked outside. As Chris read through the license plates of the cars, he noticed that the first several cars said "Georgia - The Peach State". However, the last license plate read, or at least REALLY looked like it said, "Georgia - The Penis State".
- Professor Roderick Clifford
WHY? When Professor Clifford first said this in his England to 1760 class, everyone had been half-asleep and had no idea what prompted the statement. However, eventually his line of thinking was figured out... we think. Apparently, Clifford had been telling a story about a lecture he attended in which the speaker said something like "While most people look at a piece of modern art and say 'I could do that!', really only one in a million make a hit." Then someone near him had said "Kind of like sperm." And since Clifford owns a lot of modern art, the above quote followed. What a way to get woken up in class...
