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| Chapter Twelve Chapter Twelve: Part I Mercury Guardian 2003-11-27 Wow... I read the whole thing in about three days. I hope you write more soon. I can't wait to see the other two generals come in. Keep it up. Mercury Guardian Mage Raistlin 2003-11-26 Love the story. looking forward to the rest of it. Mage Raistlin kalinda 2003-11-24 brilliant chapter it was just so beautifully written cant wait to read the next one SailorMeteor 2003-11-22 you are mean! you made me cry! i feel sorry for serena, all she did was protect the planet! but what does she get back... this hurt... please continue and update fast! please! don't leave serena hanging... alone in the grave ([email protected]) 2003-11-15 30 Anonymousthis is a great fic more chappies asap! Chibi Pluto 2003-11-11 30Signed Hey, first off, really sorry about not reviewing sooner. I kinda got caught up in your story...^_^ Anyways, fantastic story. I really love it. I think you did a great job of portraying Serena's parents. Excellent job, please update soon! blackcat212 2003-10-26 mabey you should put what Serena's pearets thought? gert story !! Transcendant Pig 2003-10-25 i think it would be really tough to go through what serena did. i dont think i would have survived half as well as she did if i were her. happygolucky111 2003-10-25 wow, FINALLY someone has written a notsohappy hello between serena and her parents. bout time! anywho, this story was REALLY good. i liked the bit of individualism, and i loved how serena is still going forward to help her friends and think of htem first. v. cool. keep writing, i cant wait for the next chappie! Lil-PrincessK 2003-10-24 Ok, it so serves the parents right to not have their daughter after kicking her out. they didn't even know the REASON, so Serena was so not in the wrong. They just keep jumping to conclusions! **realizes she is obsessing over fictional charaters...** LoL, yea, short, but very necessary, I think. I ALSO think that Sammy should sneak out some more to visit Serena, even though he'll prolly get into trouble, heeheehee. Serenity's Rose 2003-10-24 Hey! Geez I think i should bang my head against the wall for not reading your story sooner. *bang* *bang* *bang* I love your story so far. It's so well written. ^^. I just hope there's not a long wait to see what happens next. Question though...Will you bring the outers in this story or id this just involving the inners and Enymion's court? Well i'll leave ya be. 'till next time...you're on my fav's list ^-^. ~Serenity's Rose~ Prophetess Of Hearts 2003-10-24 *whimpers and tries not to cry* can we please, please please kill off Sere's parents. They hurt her real bad... *scoffs* i hope those major freaking ass's realize that Sere wasn't being selfish, or screwing up her life... but saving and helping others...GR.. they need to get their head out of their @ss Jabba1 2003-10-24 wow a really powerfull chapter. i came this close to crying. keep up the good work. abby BenRG 2003-10-24 Hm... Maybe it is me, but I get the feeling that Serena doesn't /want/ to be happy. I know that sounds odd, but I think that, on some level, she is certain that she is a screw up and that is distorting all her attempts to be happy. It could be a natural part of what she has been through, but it is still sad to watch. I rather think it is time for Raye to tell her that it is /selfish/ to claim others' problems as your own. It is even more selfish to force someone to live without part of their lives in a misguided attempt to protect them. I think Raye is the best one to tell her, BTW. ;-) I am afraid that this /was/ rushed. I'm not you, but I would have spent more time on the confrontation and less on the introspection. But this is your story so... BenRG's Rating: 7/10 Shimmering Angel 2003-10-24 *You inspire me SO much *fanfiction-mode clicks* I HAVE to a part from her parents' point of view! ~ I watched to see how she could explain herself. Why on earth did we ever have a daughter who caused so much trouble? Why can't our lessons get through to her? She took a deep breath. I thought she was going to start explaining but instead she took that weird broach of her's out and said foreign words that I never thought I would EVER hear her say. "Moon Prism Power." Quietly and softly. Before I knew what was happening, Serena started changing. She transforms (in her normal original-series way) but her eyes filled with silent, silvery tears and her face looked weary instead- as if she had done this a million times before. I could barely believe it. Suddenly, she spoke in a strange language- so regal and un-ditzy like. "I, Serenity, protector of this planet, princess of the Moon and my royal court, heiress and daughter of the reincarnation of the goddess Selene Queen Serenity, and future queen of thirtieth century earth Crystal Tokyo, vow on my two lives and two deaths never to allow my enemies to use your son again in any way. I am truly sorry for what you have gone through and pray that someday you will be able to forgive me for all the pain I have caused you." Never in my whole life did the realization came that I don't know my *own* daughter. She's been sneaking out every night, saving the world, and all I did was kick her out. How much more do I still not know about my own blood. Well, technically my blood anyway, from her long list of titles spinning in my head. I opened my mouth but I didn't know what to say. But then she leapt up on the rooftop with such grace and power (how many people do you know who can jump higher than the olympics?) I wanted to stop her. But suddenly, she glowed with an aura of pure light and disappeared into thin air! How could her daugter be so powerful yet such a klutz? ~ Don't mind me, I'm just a bit thing in the head. If you are unlucky, you might even hear more of my useless blabbering I called "random inspirations" PS Did I mention that you should update quickly before I kill you? I love scenes when it is "the-secret-is-out-kinda-thing". Leaving me hanging can be a dangerous choice. UPDATE! roswellachick 2003-10-23 ...no i course i won't yell @ u ...i'd never...*zips lips & throws away zipper*...*pouts hand uder lap* dude *sniffle*...por sere...umm *grr* can i just punch her dad?!?!? ~_~..."She hadn't really planned on transforming in front of them like that but she knew now that it had been the only way. There was no way thet they would have believed mere words. Especially not from her."--thats true + sad @the same time..."And not only had she lost the hope of regaining her parents, but she had lost her brother as well."--S8niffle* thats horrid..parents r supose 2 b acceptin, esp 2 their own kids "she would always know that not all her family had abandoned her. Her brother had stood by her, fought for her, loved her."--thants right dang it & there r the scouts!!...hey she can cry on their shoulder 2...gr how could y-...oops ^_^ i 4got no yellin...*closes eyes*...*sigh* 'til next update late Ocianne 2003-10-23 Hehehe... Angst! Anger! Sadness! Much as I tend to dislike them, you did good with them here. This chapter was about what I expected (and I didn't see any typos ;)). Oh... Rei's gonna beat up Jadeite! Even though I feel a little sorry for him, I wanna see it. *snickers* And I completely forgot about Zoi having the ring. O_o That will be an... interesting chapter, I'm sure. So if you're delaying bringing in Jadeite, where's Kunzite? *looks around for silver-hair boy.* Hope he appears soon! Well, I'll let you get back to writing. Update quick! ~Ocianne Kitsune Moonstar 2003-10-23 That was a great chapter. It would be interesting to have some of the scouts run into Serena's aprents after this and see what their reactions would be. And someone needs to convince Serena that she doesn't have to always be the strong one no matter what she thinks. Oh well, maybe by the end of the story she'll have figured that out. Kit ~_^ Bluejello 2003-10-23 *whistles* Whew. What kind of fallout can we expect from Serena's parents, now? I'm sure they're gonna want an explaination. Maybe Sammy will explain, but it's all going to come back to Serena, isn't it? Chibi J 2003-10-23 Okay, it's been a while since I have reviewed, but I'm big on long chapters, so I just kinda blend several chapters together for you. Does that make sense?? Oh, well... I loved the chapter "Parentals". I'm a TAFF kinda girl, so I love the angst. I just hope that there isn't any quick make-up between them all now that they know who she is, that would be very disappointing. However, I do sense that something big is going to happen, because Serena doesn't deserve to have so much misery in her life. Can't wait for more! Usako4life 2003-10-23 OH MY GOD! You got the chapter out REAL SOON! I applaud you! Hmm.. what to say about this chapter. Oh yes... EVIL PARENTS! I love the Tsukinos but jeez, you sure made them mean in this chapter! Kenji is NICE!! I wanna have a chapter with just them being like OH MY GOD!! Get me? Lol. I feel bad for Serena and Sammy better yell at them! Oh my GOD!! Malachite is coming! I can't wait! Great job!! A little more dialogue please! WOOT WOOT! Hurry UP! ~Belle~ P.S: You know I love you story right?? serry 2003-10-23 I luv it! get a new chappie up soon! missaw 2003-10-23 well. that was certainly depressing. meaning, i LOVED IT! angst is very good that it is! damned parentals ^_^ lol anyways, awesome job!! update soon onegai!! chris 2003-10-23 sheya! thanks for updating so soon! sososo great! but sad.. poor serena more more more!! (i feel like a lil kid in a candy store (woah.. that expression is used too often)) chris Ellen 2003-10-23 Hey! Guess what? You get a cookie for updating just when I wanted you to! YAY! Newayz, cool chappie & update soon! (I have more cookies...) Lady of Pluto ([email protected]) 2003-10-23 I love this story! It is so good! But for some reason you haven't been including me in your author responses lately. Oh well. Anyhoo, Ja ne!! angel313 2003-10-23 I can't wait for the next chapter. I hope that you will update soon. aurora 2003-10-23 hey!! first time reader here! anyways, it took me like 2-3 hours but i finally finished ur story!! that was incredible!! ur story was very imaginative and i liked how u took some parts from the TV series. plz continue!! Kaji1 2003-10-23 ...ok, i am so touched by this last chapter, it makes me teary...honestly the beauty in this last one was amazing, it's that she's breaking apart on the inside and yet all she can think about is her friends...this is my biggest reason for always loving Sailor Moon... I'm sorry i haven't been keeping up with my checking up, but this one was completely worth it, I loved it so much, thank you for sending me the notification of the update, it really helped...i just want you to know that as much as I loved your work, this chapter has shed a whole new light on u'r talent, you are an amazing writer...I am completely enthralled with u'r work..and i hope to read some more of u'r wonderfully exceptional work. Kaj. Marni 2003-10-23 Poor Serena! I do hope things will improve. Sailor Momoiro Hoshi 2003-10-23 Hiyo! I LOVED the suspense in this story. Because of that, I award you...-rummages through cookie jar- AHA! -pulls out eight cookies- Hearts! Stars! Horseshoes! Clovers and Blue Moons! Pots of Gold n Rainbows! And the Red Balloons! FWE! Divamercury 2003-10-23 Wow! This story was really great! I read it all in one sitting and I love how you've played around with the timeline. PLEASE continue soon! ~DM Mercurial1 2003-10-23 Good chapter!! I loved the fact that serena's parents didn't welcome her back, but at the end, they realized what was going on!! Total ANGST! So, what's the deal with Lita and Nephlite? Is Mina going to find her true love? What's going on with rini and helios? and what about Rei? is she going to get back together with Jediate? And if so, what about chad...what's his take on that?!! HELP ME!! UPDATE SOON! JerseyGirl03 2003-10-23 This was great. Yay! Um...you will update again soon. Right? Could you have one general be in the western hemisphere or Spain? X5-452Star 2003-10-23 I love how you're keeping this realistic. I've read many stories (not just SM) where people have it once loved ones learn the truth all is forgiven. Where as Kenji is staying true to his temper and how I feel he would indeed react at that very moment. When I write stories I run any dialogue through my head multiple times till I know it is staying true to the characters nature and already given personality. You're doing great. Although if Serena is still in the park come next chapter I highly expect Darien to show up. For he can sense when she transforms, and we can't forget their link. But it is truly up to you. Please keep up the good work. =) Chapter Twelve: Part 2 Miko633 2003-12-04 Excellent chapter! I was starting to wonder if you had dropped of the face of the earth but here you are again so I guess I don't need to worry anymore. I'm glad that you added this part in, there comes a time in a story like this where the main character has to dig deep within themselves and find the strength to keep going. Everyone has doubts and some authors just assume that because the character is a superheroine that they're perfect. You have done an excellent job of anaylizing your characters and realizing that they are in fact not perfect. I commend you and await the next chapter where I am sure even more amazing writing will await me. Till then Miko Oholibamah 2003-12-04 I just recently started browsing this site, and lucky for me I stumbled across your story! I'm really picky when it comes to stuff like fanfiction, but I must say: this is truly a diamond in the rough, and I'm obsessed! =D I love the mystery behind the villains, and how you slowly let it leak out... I also love how you're able to catch the personality of each scout to a tee! Also, your fight scenes are awesome. =D Keep up the good work! I have absolutely no complaints, but I will if you decide to stop! ^.^ Major props! esther 2003-12-04 season's greetings!oh,and good story!I haven't read a story this good since "the new students"by Angel White Chan.you better write another chapter soon or I think i'll become annoying to u.Anyway, happy holidays and don't forget to write a chapter happygolucky111 2003-12-04 gee, can u write a bit on what her parents r thinkin onw? that would b so great. rock on missaw 2003-12-04 yeah thats a good point. it must end good! lol yeah a lot of people love angst. haha its great... anyways, the chapter was great! even if it was short.. >_< you should've at least added in a cute little usa/mamo scene! *pouts* haha its okay that its short, i'm just glad you got the chappy out ^_~ hmm so jadeites gonna show up soon huh? how much longer do ya think you're gonna make this story? hm well, again, this was an awesome chapter, update soon onegai! BenRG 2003-12-04 Firstly, I want to thank you for how you portrayed Rei in this chapter. Too often, people fixate on the permanently angry and bullying Rei of the anim� and forget how supportive Rei is in the manga, without losing the forceful personality and temper that makes her so distinctive. It is good to see a writer show Rei get mad without getting mean. That said, I can't wait to see how she handles meeting Jadeite again. After all, he is the only one who /survived/ Beryl's fall (in crystal, but alive). He might not be as glad as the other Generals are to turn to the light side... BenRG's Rating: 7/10 Sailor Momoiro Hoshi 2003-12-04 Loved the chapter! I wonder where Jadeite will be found in... Glad you like the cookies!:D I had to wrestle the Lucky Charms leprechaun for it...Good thing I have a hard head! Today I bring...-rummages through interdimensional cookie jar and pulls out a GIANT cookie in a pill shape covered with white sugar- A SUGAR PILL! SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR! -bounces around room- Sailor Phoenix 2003-12-04 God stuff!! Please update?! Kaji1 2003-12-04 hey! once again, some of the best I'm reading, comes from you, keep up the awesome work. Love Kaji! Merry Christmas...or Happy Chaunuka (ugh bad spelling)...meh...SEASON'S GREETINGS! Kaj. lina 2003-12-04 need more sere/dare! =) Phoeaix 2003-12-03 New chapter yay about time!...sorry shouldn't have said that what with me still having to write new chapters for my own stories. anyway i can't really think of anything to say except the usual good chapter more soon thing, so i guess i'll leave it at that. Kitsune Moonstar 2003-12-03 Wonderful chapter, if a bit short. Still it's great, and I'm glad Rei's trying to talk some sense into Serena. A line from the play my drama class is working on seemed to fit this fic perfectly. It was: Careful the things you say; children will listen. It seems to fit perfectly with Serena's relationship with her parents. Keep up the great work. Kit~_^ X5-452Star 2003-12-03 =) I was inspiration. Wow. First time for everything I guess. And I did enjoy this chapter. Because you dug deeper into the fact that Raye and Serena DON'T fight ALL the time. =) And that they do take more then three seconds to say one nice thing before going back to argueing. That's one thing that's the best part of this story. You seem to realize and show the more realistic parts of things. Like just because they get their memory back doesn't mean all is forgiven. Darien being human and HAVING a protective streak. And the list does go on. =) But I don't want to get boring. So till your next chapter. Toodles. Mercurial1 2003-12-03 *waves* HAHA MIKO!! *PWTB* I got to read the chapter before ALL Y'ALL! *ahem* D- good chapter! glad you went with Darien not mina...*nods approval* Congrats on the 500th review and btw: Rini and Helios?? *nudge nudge/wink wink?* sometime soon? maybe by chap33? COOL! S |
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| The reviews listed here are based on a differant chapter system than what I currently have set up on this site. What I have done, is take the reviews, and split them up according to the chapter they coincide with on this site. I know, sounds confusing but I'm sure you'll get it. Also, Kitsun Moonstar sent me this awsome little pic for getting 500 reviews. Check it out here. |