Top Ten Things every Xenite should Know
10. It's spelled with an X!
9. Argo is a mare (female)
8. Greek Gods are petty
7. One can achieve redemtion by killing all the bad guys
6. Pots make excellent weapons
5. Seafood is good (My Cat's contribution)
4. Subtext is in the eye of the Beholder
3. It's spelled C-H-A-K-R-A-M
2. Gabrielle is not a ditzy blonde (New Gab's contribution)
1. How to yell Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi!

Top Ten things to never say to an Obsessed Xena Fan
10. You mean they haven't cancelled that show yet?
9. This is soooo stupid
8. Joxer sure can sing well
7. Does Gabrielle ever shut up?
6. Argo is such a ugly stallion
5. You mean you taped this over my tape of Buffy?!
4. Wow, Ares and Xena make such a great couple
3. That Gabrielle is such a dumb blonde
2. Lesbians are so gross
1. So, when is Buffy going to be on?

Top Ten Things that every Xenite has Done
10. Viewed every Xena website in Existence
9. Including the one with only a brief mention on Xena halfway down
8. Memorized every episode
7. Wished they had nutbread
6. Imagine what they would look like in Xena or Gab's outfit
5. Tried singing as well as Lucy does (and failed...)
4. Tried to yell Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi!
3. Tried writing fanfic
2. Written a top ten list and then gotten stuck on #2 trying to figure out what to write...
1. Argo knows what #1 is and she's selling it on ebay

Top Ten Things Xenites do for fun that aren't related to Xena
~scrathches head~ On second thought, I can't think of any...
Next...

Top Ten Things Xenites do for Fun when not watching XWP
10. You mean they actually stop watching Xena for even a mintue?!
9. Talk about XWP
8. Think anout XWP
7. Worship XWP
6. Listen to XWP music
5. Read XWP fanfic
4. Visit XWP websites
3. Write XWP fanfic
2. Read XWP Top Ten lists
1. Get the idea?

Top Five Things on every Xenite's Website
5. Ye Olde Chakrum buttons
4. That animation of a scroll saying E-mail
3. A statement of whether the site is or isn't subtext friendly
2. Pictures of the webmaster in a homemade Xena outfit *shudders*
1. Link to this page (I wish....)

Top Ten Signs you're Subtext Friendly
(note: this might be offensive to non-subtext frienldy persons, so please avert your eyes and hit the back button)
10. You can't stand people who say they're just friends
9. You're favorite pictures are of them kissing
8. You love it when one is near death and the other is holding them are and crying and telling them they love them
7. When Xena's hurt/dead your advice to Gab is to kiss her
6. You hate people who think Ares and Xena make a great couple
5. Whenever Argo snorts you imagine she said "Get a Room"!
4. You hate how the series ended (however this doesn't nescessarely mean you're subtext friendly, it could just mean you have taste)
3. You read "alternative" fanfic, which in actuality is the majority of fanfic...
2. You're site gets hate mail complaining about all the "subtext propoganda"
1. You think Gab and Xena are lesbians (Very big clue you're subtext friendly)

Top Twenty Signs you're obsessed with Xena
1. You have every episode on tape
2. And dvd
3. And you watch them all at least once a week
4. You can talk along
5. And sing along
6. Even the songs in foreign languages
7. You're going into withdrawal symptoms now that Xena is over
8. You have a strong opinion on whether Gab's hair was better long or short and you are willing to debate it with anyone
9. You talk so much about Xena that you've converted some of your friends (You still haven't gotten me New Gab, I still like Xena better when she was evil, so there)
10. You watch Xena so much that now your members of your family are forced fans
11. You've cut/dyed your hair to look like one of the characters
12. You've read all about the greek gods just to get closer to your favorite show
13. You think Xena is a factual show about real past events (You are really obsessed, really really obsessed, get yourself a psychiatrist)
14. You threaten to kill people who call gab a dumb blonde
15. You've built a shrine in your room (actually your room is a shrine) dedicated to Xena
16. You yell Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi while playing sports
17. You yell Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi just because you feel like it
18. You have visited every XWP website in existence
19. Even the ones in forein languages
20. In fact, you're taking Greek in school because of XWP

Top Ten Things overheard in a Xena chat
10. Why? Why did they have to cancel the show....?
9. So, what's up?
Not much.
8. Check out my site at www.blahblah.com! (Hey, don't look at me, I've never done this, it was some other Zeplerfer...)
7. Hey, anyone seen any good fanfic lately?
6. Please, as if anyone says 6 in a xena chat...
5. Ok everyone, Gab's hair, better long or short?
4. What do you mean you don't see the subtext, are you BLIND?
3. Sign the petion for a movie!
2. Ya, like in Xena chats they actully talk about Xena
1. Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi-Yi!

The Ten Commandments of Running a XWP Webpage
1. Xena/Gab is thy God. Thou shall have no gods before her
2. Thou *shall* make many montages
3. Thou shalt not take the name of Xena/Gab in vain, but thou may swear using the Greek Gods name. "Damn you to Hades!"
4. Thou shall update often
5. Honor TPTB, unless they're being idiots, than damn them to Hades!
6. Thou shalt not kill Xena/Gab in a fanfic, unless thou brings them back to life
7. Thou shalt not use many annoying little animations that take forever to load, *especially* that chakram one
8. Thou shalt not steal other's work
9. Thou shall remember to disclaim!
10. Thou shall covet all that is great about Xena/Gab!
(If you're wondering why this list is here, the answer is simple. I'm lazy and the miscellaneous page is full).

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