Brief synopsis:
A Scarren catches Crichton on a commerce planet, and subjects him to torture, in the form of strange scenarios taken from drastically warped memories of life on earth, and also involving the people he has met in the Uncharted Territories. Crichton is made to believe that he never went on his adventure, and that he was merely dreaming until awakening back on Earth. From here things get more and more crazy as he meets some of the most bizarre situations he has ever encountered.

The Main Story:
The shuttle takes off from Earth, and Farscape One is released to begin its mission. As before, an electromagnetic wave approaches, and as Crichton is about to begin, the wave hits, and Farscape One is sent spinning out of control. However, no wormhole, instead, Crichton awakens in hospital, and is greeted by his father. He's seen this kind of thing before though, thanks to the Ancients, and is instantly suspicious, throwing his father to the ground and demanding to know who he is. After being restrained he is greeted by a familiar doctor, one who looks much like Aeryn Sun.

The doctor turns out to be a Bettina Fairchild, who reports that Crichton is physically fit, but becomes increasingly suspicious about his mental health. After telling John about the crash, and asking why Crichton seemed determined to call her Aeryn, Bettina sends him to have a full psyche report. Crichton leaves, suspecting that something happened on the commerce planet he had been visiting. He begins checking the details of this place, and discovers that the mistakes the Ancients made, such as no memory of the female bathroom, are not present. Who or whatever is in control of this, has every detail pretty much nailed.

Shortly afterwards, Crichton bumps into DK, his friend and co-worker on the Farscape project, and also his father, Jack Crichton. They tell Crichton that the Farscape project is circling the drain, and that he must get a clean bill of health in his psyche report with Doctor Jane Kaminski. Crichton then goes to the doctor's office, to find that the doctor looks very much like Zhaan. After discussing what Crichton really thinks might have happened, listing several potential bad guys responsible, Crichton decides to just tell the doctor what she wants to hear so that he can be free of the hassle. Soon after leaving, John and DK meet Gary Ragel, another astronaut, who looks a lot like D'Argo.

Together, the three go to a bar for beer, where they meet Bettina Fairchild, who shows a strange attraction to Gary, and Crichton also sees Scorpius and Pilot playing in a band. Going to the bar for more drinks, Crichton meets another Scorpius, a shock for certain, and he asks the name, expecting another invented name to be fired at him. To his surprise, this is really Scorpius, no silly costume, no nothing, just Scorpius, suggesting he is responsible for the current events. Scorpius tells Crichton he isn't behind it, but that he is the only one who can help Crichton escape this. Before he can ellaborate however, Scorpius has to leave.

Crichton blacks out at this point, and finds himself back for another psychiatric report, this time suggesting that he is still aboard Moya, dribbling on the floor whilst the other crew stare at him wondering what finally made him crack. Afterwards, he is taken to the new project administrator by his father. This D Logan turns out to be Rygel in a suit, something that causes Crichton to fool about with the new administrator. However, Logan does still say he is giving the project another chance, allowing Crichton to try his mission again. Crichton instantly suspects that this is what its all about - the person behind this wants to see how he made the wormhole so that the knowledge can be used.

Things get quite crazy here as Logan follows Crichton from the office, resulting in Crichton chucking the little guy off the side of a building, With DK and Jack suitably stunned, Crichton heads back to the bar to meet Gary, Bettina, and also Jessica, who looks like Chiana. When the real Scorpius reappears nearby, Crichton asks if they'll all go for a drive, one which ends in a massive crash as Scorpius, on the wind shield, argues with Crichton. Bizarrely, they are all okay, and John reawakens in hospital, finding out that none of them even have a scratch.

A new guest arrives then, and its John's mother. This is a massive shock as she had died several years ago. She tries to comfort him, but seems to be distant, stating that Crichton has changed too much, and that he has killed, something only Crichton knew in this place. John is unwilling to be subjected to this, and quickly leaves. John goes to the bar, where he meets with the wrong Scorpius, the band member. Before frustration can sink in, his mother reappears, this time as the hospitalised version he remembers shortly before she passed away. In tears from this torture, Crichton leaves, but as he walks home he is stopped by a police officer looking like Captain Crais. The conversation goes swiftly down hill, resulting in Crichton punching Crais and taking his gun.

Later Crichton returns to Logan's office, where things get even weirder. He is eventually prompted to start shooting everything and everyone, but somehow they are all invincible. He then blacks out again and awakens in hospital to find the police officer waiting for him with a small bill for his crimes. At this point the real Scorpius returns to reveal that the culprit is a Scarren, which explains the fact that Crichton seems to be sweating. Scorpius is there because he is a neural clone, inserted as part of a neural chip, by Scorpius when Crichton was a prisoner at his Gammak base. Scorpius intends to keep Crichton alive so as to extract the wormhole knowledge, and this means giving John lessons on how to defeat Scarrens.

John awakens from his lesson to find himself confronted by Chiana, Zhaan and Aeryn in black leather, preparing to, well, experiment. This interesting scene takes a dramatic turn though when Rygel becomes involved, using a whip as punishment for all of Crichton's names for the Hynerian - Sparky, Fluffy etc... The flashes then become more frequent, as he sees himself as a massive baby, whilst his parents argue over prefering a dog, whilst DK goes insane. He is then thrown out of a window and attacked by the police officer again, who reads him his rights.

Crichton is then in a car, sat next to D'Argo (or Gary) who seems to have turned completely gay, asking that they perform a luxan bonding ritual whilst being watched by Chiana. More insanity follows, even involving his mother, before he finally ends up at a disco with Jessica and Bettina. Things begin to slow down then, and what looks to be the real Aeryn comes onto the dancefloor and rescues Crichton. Aeryn says he was being held captive by Scorpius, who she has now killed, and demands to know what he wanted. When Crichton refuses, it becomes clear this isn't the real Aeryn, again. John is then returned to the mayhem, hit by a torent of visions from the past day, mixed together driving him nearly insane.

A Scarren, Grath, is then seen in a research chamber, with Crichton being held in some kind of suspended animation, or trance. Grath is recording audio, and reporting the results of the experiment. Increasing the level of torture from "kelvo 9" to "kelvo 10" is too much however, and Crichton slumps to the floor having not revealed anything to the Scarren. Grath then reports John dead, but is interrupted by the sound of an overloading pulse pistol. Confident that pulse pistols can't harm the Scarren, Grath comes over to investigate, giving Crichton the chance to ram the pistol into Grath's mouth, the one weak spot, causing the Scarren to explode, freeing Crichton.

Scorpius then reveals that the Scarren had thought Crichton dead because Scorpius had momentarily stopped Crichton's heart as a distraction. Crichton says that now he knows about the chip, he will get it removed, but the neural clone is too powerful, and within moments, Crichton is unable to remember what it was that he was trying to remember. Scorpius then departs, after reassuring Crichton that he will always be there, keeping Crichton safe.

Trivia Quiz:

References and continuity:

Crichton: "Won't get fooled again!"
Lady in bathroom: "Hey! D'you mind?"
Crichton: "Sorry, I thought it was co-ed."
Lady in bathroom: "Co-ed?!? What planet are you from?"
Crichton: "Not this one..."

A great reference to A Human Reaction this one as Crichton discovered that only places he had previously visited could be used in the simulation created by the Ancients. This meant that there was just empty light when he visited the ladies room. He refers to other inconsistencies corrected in this version as well, such as the up to date papers, moving onto the next victim, demonstrating that this could potentially be the real Earth.

Crichton: "Dig your style Ringo!"
Scorpius: "John, we haven't much time."
Crichton: "Twins? Pity your mother!"

A reference to Ringo Starr, the drummer from the massively popular British group, the Beatles. He was also famous for narrating the Thomas The Tank Engine series during the 80s.

• John tells Jane Kaminsky that he and Zhaan shared unity once, this was back in Rhapsody In Blue when Crichton tried to help Zhaan supress her dark side.
• John says it couldn't be the Ancients doing this to him, as they've done it before, which was in the episode A Human Reaction.
• He also says it isn't Maldis as it isn't gothic enough. Maldis was in a castle in That Old Black Magic and a painting in Picture If You Will.
• Scorpius also explains that Crichton has a chip in his head, which explains why Crichton was unable to kill Scorpius in The Maltese Crichton.

Bettina Fairchild: "You called me Aeryn..."
Crichton: "Old girlfriend. You look a lot like her, except you have prettier hair."

John covers over the fact that he thinks he knows Bettina as Aeryn, but also voices his feeling about Aeryn's hair, and he isn't wrong.

Crichton "Strange - I miss Moya. A ship full of aliens becomes so normal." Its nice to see that kind of transition. Gone are Crichton's days of being a space newbie. Now he can't remember exactly what it was like on Earth. DK: "We don't have tim for a beer." Gary Ragel: "Oh-h no time for beer..." Crichton: "Beer? Keys!" Gary Ragel: "My friend, one thing you have to learn - there is *always* time for beer."

Having been away from Earth for so long, it doesn't matter to Crichton whether this is real or not, its just a great opportunity to have a beer, something he hasn't done for a long time.

Crichton: "So, what's your name? Who do you play in this fun-house?"
Scorpius: "You know my name. Scorpius."
Crichton: "Scorpy. You don't fit the pattern. You got no Halloween costume, got no assumed name, you're not playing a role. That suggests something to me - you're the man behind the curtain."

This is when Crichton finds out the real Scorpius has a presence here, though at first he suspects Scorpius is responsible for this mess. However, it turns out that this Scorpius is an ally, one who helps John survive on many occasions.

Police Lieutenant: "Assault on a police officer, theft of police property, illegal possession of a firearm, five counts of attempted murder. That comes to $29.40. Cash, cheque or credit card?"

Crais, as a police officer, is insane. Has to be. Its a brilliant way of messing with Crichton's head though. One of my favourite lines of the movie that.

Crichton: "You put something in my head!" Scorpius: "A very sophisticated neuro-chip. It contains... well, it contains me, or a mental clone of my personality." Crichton: "That explains the visions I've been having!" The revealing moment - Scorpius tells Crichton what's been going on all this time, and its a neural chip that did it. Where does Crichton go from here?

Police Lieutenant: "Freeze! You're under arrest. You have the right to the remains of a silent attorney. If you cannot afford one, tough noogies. You can make one phone call, I recommend Tracey - 976 555 LOVE. Do you understand these rights as I have explained them to you? Well! Do you punk?" Crichton: "No." Police Lieutenant: "Then I can't arrest you!" Totally normal honest... but don't forget the fact that he was wearing pink slippers. Brilliant!

Gary Ragel: "We're on fi-ire! Common John, you're driving like a chicken!"
Crichton: "I got a new theory on life. You wanna hear it?"
Gary Ragel: "Oh yeh man, lay it on me, lay it on me!"
Crichton: "Life sucks, nothing matters, screw it all. Let's party."
Gary Ragel: "I am so there!"

Gary, Bettina and Jessica are all going nuts, whilst John is clearly showing some signs of weakening as he perhaps gets a little depressed.

Gary Ragel: "John. I really need to unburden myself on you."
Crichton: "Wha?"
Gary Ragel: "Well, lately, I've been thinking 'bout you in a very different way."
Crichton: "Uh, hmm."
Gary Ragel: "Mmm Hmm, and I was wondering if you wouldn't mind participating with me in a little Luxan bonding ritual. Here's the thing ok... What we need are some chains, my Qualta blade, just a little squirt of luxarr oil and, oh... Chiana."
Crichton: "Chiana...?"
Gary Ragel: "Yeh... She wants to watch."
Crichton: "Oh no!"
Gary Ragel: "Oh yes!"

The final straw for viewers, D'Argo going gay! Anthony Simcoe has a good handle on how we public think of camp behaviour, and ewwww!

Scorpius: "I leave you with your shipmates John, but rest assured, I'll be with you always, keeping you safe."

With Crichton's memory of the chip erased, Scorpius goes into hiding again, but he is clearly there for more than just the path to John's wormhole knowledge, and will continue to help keep Crichton alive for allowing Scorpius to track them down.

Writer:

Richard Manning wrote this episode. If you ask me, his episodes get better and better as they go on. I wasn't a massive fan of Throne For A Loss, but by the time he writes Terra Firma, his episodes are fantastic! Anyway, he also wrote: