Haven, City of Violence Quotes

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We're the metal spork gang.

THE CAST:
Andrew C: Zack
Jim: El Seed
Sarah: Natasha (Collateral Damage)
Andrew F: Boris (Maurice)
Sara: Lei Feng
Amy: Monica (Princess)
Morgan: GM

THE QUOTES:

11/1/04 and 11/8/04

On sporks:
Zack: Boom, spork out the window. Bang. There were bars on the windows.

On team names, catchy:
Zack: We're the metal spork gang.

On frightening thoughts:
Andrew C: (to Monica) Rohipnol! You're going to date rape Flounder.

On mishearing things:
Amy: Did I hear that right, there's a dog with a sword?

On courage:
GM: (as Shen) You should stand with me and we will kill them together.
Lei Feng: My sword hasn't come in the mail yet.

On being in a hurry:
Natasha: Are you sporking out her eyes yet so we can go?

On is that what they call it?
Jim: …after we're done sporking Gino's cousin.

On cute boyfriends:
Monica: Spending time with my cute boyfriend.
Natasha: Cute boyfriend.
Zack: (raises hand) Me, too.
GM: Yeah, so you're (Natasha) spending time with Giovanni, you're (Monica) spending time with Sebastiano, and you're (Zack) spending time with Maurice.

On silver linings:
GM: (to Lei Feng) So, you get hit by a car. Don't worry, cars don't hurt that much.

On making sense:
L.F's brother: Do you know what [Viridian]'s done to you?
Lei Feng: No… And that's why I don't want it done to me.

On moving buddies:
Jim: (to Lei Feng) Take Maurice with you. Just explain that he's your Heffalump.

On kidnapping Lei Feng:
GM: I got one, I got one! Armistad Bingo. Check one: Chinese boy.

On sacrifices:
GM: So far, nothing that has to do with a blade or, you know, gunpowder.
Zack: Damn! You mean I've got to put away the knife I have covered in gunpowder?

On Soylent Green:
Jim: Grape soda - now with more Lei Feng.

On descriptions, TMI:
Jim: Running, running, running like a constipated weiner dog.

On distinctions:
Andrew F: (to Lei Feng) We don't sacrifice you to the wolves - you go find the wolves and go, "Hey, eat me."

On ESL:
Lei Feng: Hand hurt! Use foot!

On just now finding that out?
Boris: [creepy, high laughter]
GM: And Boris is a sick fuck.

On whatever do you mean, sir?
GM: Sabotage does not make things better, unless by better you mean blowed up.

On Marvin Gaye:
GM: So you got healing chi?
Jim: Sounds like sexual healing to me.

On babysitting:
Zack: Hey, Monica, we leave you the Lei Feng harness, make sure she doesn't wander off.

On pawning off Lei Feng:
Monica: You can share a bed with Boris.
Boris: [bad Russian accent] Boris is warm.
Morgan: [mimes ripping his shirt open, same accent] Boris is like a bear.

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