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Fraser Island, Australia
Best for: Getting Away From It All

What you'll find: Made entirely of sand, Fraser's a 70mile long scenic paradise, known to the Aborigines as "K'gari" - literally "beautiful" - with a vast white beach running between the glass blue ocean, and a lush tropical forest that hides away over 200 picturesque lakes.

Who'll be there: Marvel at the Japanese - who lurk behind the tinted windows of air-conditioned Land Cruisers - and the Brits, who roar up the beach in cheap rented vehicles. Amazingly, the beach also doubles up as a runway for local Aussies, and the sight of an aeroplane roaring ten yards behind a bemused jeep driver is not uncommon.

When to go: Avoid the April school holidays and go in March, when the temperature drops below 30°C, killing the mosquitoes and sandflies that'll scoff you alive during the summer months.

What the travel agent won't tell you: For four of you, a jeep will cost around ten squid each per day, and you can kip on the beach for free - making it cheaper than a walking weekend in Snowdonia.

How to get there: Austravel will fly you there for £590, and accommodation at the luxurious Kingfisher Bay Resort starts for £41 per night (call 020 7734 7755).

Try Also: The Similan Islands, Thailand (nine uninhabited islands, best visited between December and May when the sea becomes crystal clear. Contact: The Tourism Authority Of Thailand on 020 7499 7679), or Ilha Grande, Brazil (tropical jungle, three small towns, and what is claimed to be the finest beach in Brazil. For more details contact: South American Experience on 020 7976 5511). Alternatively, go for Saba in the Caribbean (known as the "Unspoiled Queen", Saba is a volcano that rises out of the sea and disappears into the clouds, leaving little beaches dotted with picturesque houses. Try www.caribtourism.com).

Daytona Beach, Florida

Best for: Partying

What you'll find: A hedonist's fantasy. Men breathing fire in bars, women flashing their tits, and thousands of boozed-up students cruising along the beach in polished motors. There's always something going on at Daytona - Indy car racing, biker weekends - but Spring Break (translation: end of term for Florida's innumerable college students) is by far the most notorious. A legion of stalls offer cheap sunglasses and burnt food, and you can even sky-dive onto the beach, should you so desire.

Who'll be there: Teenage Americans loaded with fake IDs and cash. It's worth remembering that, even for a pasty while ugly tourist, your English accent will not fail you when it comes to pulling

When to go: Spring Break runs throughout March, but the last two weeks tend to evoke the most scholarly lunacy.

What the travel agent won't tell you: Forget the drugged Ibiza crowd who snigger at a little flesh in Manumission, this is where you'll find men getting head as they crawl down the Atlantic Avenue in souped-up motors, and people shagging on the Space Needle ride on Main Street Pier.

How to get there: Flights are from £400, and accommodation at a Howard Johnson Ocean Front Hotel starts at £57 per night - call Major USA Travel on 020 7393 1080

Try Also: South Padre Island, Texas (only half a mile wide at its widest point, this is basically an entire strip of bars, where visitors are expected to get pissed. Contact: Major USA Travel on 020 7393 1080); or Jaco Beach, Costa Rica (known as Party Town, the beach is 2 miles long, and bars and restaurants line it every step of the way. For more information, try the internet site: www.costarica.tourism.co.cr)

Clifton Beach, Cape Town, South Africa

Best for: Posh, Tanned, Totty

What you'll find: The Cote D'Azure of South Africa, this is where wealthy locals bask in the sun, brazenly displaying their chunky Rolexes, Gucci bikinis and all-over tans. A myriad of secluded five-star hotels line the hills above the four interlocking beaches, and an added advantage is the Atlantic Ocean - it's cold enough to make nipples jut through bikini tops like bullets.

Who'll be there: Everyone, so don't bother taking a hire car, as you won't be able to park it. The southern end of the island is the lair of "Barbecue Dad", while up towards the city, local artists craft whatever takes your fancy through the exciting medium of sand.

When to go: January, when the Atlantic's Benguela current warms enough to make swimming bearable and the upper-crust babes of the world dip their perfectly pedicured toes into the waters. Best time for an awesome view of the sunset over the Cape Flats, too.

What the travel agent won't tell you: With its proximity to town - just 2miles from a chilled lager and a triple-decker burger at the Hard Rock Café - this walks all over rival city beaches such as Bondi, and it's a great deal closer to Blighty.

How to get there: Flights to Cape Town start from £299 with TravelBag: 0207 287 5535. Five nights five-star accommodation at The Bay Hotel, plus return flights with British Airways, costs from £995 with Africa travel Centre: 020 7383 7512.

Try Also: Tahiti (fast becoming an exclusive getaway location, Tahiti receives less tourists in a year than Hawaii does in a week, and they are dripping with cash. Try: STA on 020 7361 6262); or Nice, France (just up the road from Monaco, and down wind of Cannes, Nice virtually invented spoilt girls donning the "Thong That Rides Between The Moons". Try STA for this one too: 020 7361 6262).

Borokay, Philippines

Best for: Chilling Out

What you'll find there:  Borokay has around 14 beaches - no mean feat for an island 4miles long - and all of them provide cheap, good accommodation. By far the most popular is White Beach, where restaurants crafted out of bamboo serve everything from German to Thai food, and boats bob gently on the tide, waiting to whisk you off for a day of diving and fishing. There are also plenty of secluded coves where you can bask under the palm trees and sip the local speciality - 40% (ABV) chocolate rum milkshakes.

Who'll be there: Stressed out Filipino business executives who abandon the rat race for a few days of sun, and backpackers who want to sit on a desert island - while still being able to order a beer.

When to go: Between December and May, as that's off-season for typhoons, although avoid the place during Easter, as it fills to breaking point with flip-flop-wearing Filipino holidaymakers. If it's warm enough, visit nearby Laurel Island, with its partly flooded cave, accessible to divers by a small ladder.

What the travel agent won't tell you: Island hopping on the Philippines comes with all the benefits of cheap travel, without the tie-dyed, big-bearded lunatics that infest most of the coastline of Thailand.

How to get there: Get a plane from Manila to Caticalan, and from there catch a boat to the island. Three nights in Manila, and 11 nights at the Tanglen Beach Resort, based on two people sharing, start at £742 with Philippine Island Connections: 020 7409 7519)

Try Also: Ha'atafu beach reserve, Tonga (a long white beach with acres of shallow reef acting as home to over 100 different kinds of fish. Contact: STA on 020 7361 6262; or Sofu Island, Samoa (there's only one place to stay, but the beach stretches out for 2miles and overhanging palms cast long shadows across the fine white sand. Contact: Bridge The World on 0207 734 7447).

Hat Rin Nawk, Ko Pha-Ngan, Thailand

Best for: An Alternative to Ibiza

What you'll find: By day, KO Pha-Ngan (pronounced Koh Pan-Yan) is a luscious, green, sun-drenched paradise of white sand and sparkling waters - as immortalized in Alex Garland's The Beach. Then, one night a month, the Full Moon party hits Hat Rin: a seething, pumping, fluorescent raver's Mecca of a thousand body-painted backpackers mobbing the beach bars and vibrating the night away. Thailand's happy meeting of economic collapse and occasional civil unrest mean cheap is the buzzword: you'll be hard-pushed to spend more than £20 getting smacked out of your head on goofballs and "uppers".

Who'll be there: It's the essential traveller stopover in South East Asia; to the growing number of British bar owners, it's the new Ayia Napa. Even despite the efforts of Messrs Di Caprio and Ledoyen, it's still remarkably uncommercial; a bamboo beach hut at the Sooksom Bungalows costs less than £1 per night.

What the travel agent won't tell you: To help you last until sunrise, speed is legally available as "diet pills" from a suspiciously large number of pharmacies near the beach. Local Saeng Thip whiskey also contains enough amphetamine to get a fair-sized football crowd "in the zone".

How to get there: TravelBag (020 7287 5558) do flights to Bangkok from £401. The ferry from Surat Thani whisks you to Pha-Ngan for a princely 60 baht, or £1. Then take a 40 baht taxi to Hat Rin.

Try Also: Honolulu: (call Honolulu's Tourist Office on 020 8941 4009); Kuta Beach, Bali (cheap and orgiastic thought possible occupation by the military could be problematic. Bali Tourist Board: 020 7423 9454, or Bali direct on 006 236 175 4090); Miami Beach, Florida (brash and deeply American - but burgeoning underground scene. Contact www.flausa.com/miami or phone 0906 910 1020); or Anjuna Beach, Goa (traditional favourite, but increasingly commercial old hat - call the India Tourist Board on 020 7437 3677).

Margaret River Mouth, Australia

Best for: Surfing

What you'll find: Some of Australia's strongest waves pound this beach, and you can quite easily expect to walk out of the water with enough sand in you bum-crack to build a small fortress. Take a wander through the sprawling vineyards that litter the coastline, or simply marvel at the assorted surf-mobile that crawl their way down the coast road.

Who'll be there: Long-haired Australian surfers, who'll talk of the "point breaking to the left, leaving a nice curve tail". Everyone heads to the Settlers Tavern to get hammered as soon as the sun sets, or takes the bus back to Perth.

When to go: Between January and April, when the sun blazes in clear blue skies, and cool winds known as "Freemantle Doctors" breeze in from the sea during the late afternoon.

What your travel agent won't tell you: Although it's famed for its sun and surf, most tourists prefer to head straight to Adelaide from Perth, so the beach is relatively bereft of fat Brits in Union Jack pants.

How to get there: Flights to Perth from £600 with Bridge The World: 020 7734 7447. Accommodation at Cape Lodge, Yallingup, costs from £44 a night, via Austravel on 020 7734 7755.

Try Also: Hookipa Beach, Maui, Hawaii (there's surf 365 days a year, and humpback whales are often visible from the shoreline. Contact: Major USA Travel on 020 7393 1088), or Fitzroy Beach, New Zealand (dominated by the towering Mt Taranaki, the beach offers some of the best surfing in the country. Try: Bridge The World on 0207 734 7447).

Myrtos Beach, Cephalonia

Best for: More Than Just Sand

What you'll find: Pausing only to scrape the vomit from your flip-flop, move away from the larger-drenched Greek resorts and discover the historical island setting for Louis De Bernières' literary classic Captain Corelli's Mandolin. Fiskardo Village features cypress-mantled hills and quaint Venetian buildings hiding quiet bars and top restaurants. Myrtos itself is an outstanding white sand beach, with towering limestone cliffs concealing explorable caves.

Who'll be there: Beware - the summer air is alive with the donkey-braying of posh yachty types. Otherwise you'll find misty-eyed literary buffs, fresh off the plane from Provence, clutching their dog-eared copy of De Bernières ponderous masterpiece.

When to go: The Mediterranean summer begins mid-April -but these Ionian islands are shielded from Greece's "Meltemi" - Strong northerly gusts. In June you can playfully harass rare loggerhead turtles as they lay their first eggs.

What the travel agent won't tell you: At around £13 upwards for a double room (at John Palikisianos Rooms: 033 067 441 304), it's cheaper than kebab-and-a-shag resorts like Mykonos or Crete. Also, visit the nearby village of Markopoulo: on August 15, its church was inexplicably infested with hundreds of harmless snakes with crosses on their heads. Phone the Greek Tourist Board on 020 7734 5997.

How to get there: Easyjet's flights to Athens start at £120 (phone 0870 6000000), then catch the daily flight to Cephalonia (around £37), or the ferry from Vasiliki on Lefkada Island to Fiskardo for about £1.70.

Try Also: Anse Source D'Argent, Seychelles (pale blue waters lap at the unspoilt golden beaches and wild jungle of La Digure - the perfect setting for the film Crusoe. Get more information from 020 7224 1670); Tulum, Mexico (on the Yucatan peninsula, where Mayan temples sit on glorious white beaches, gently lapped by the Caribbean. Get more information from 020 7488 9392); or Paradise Beach, Nassau (this bleached strip is where they filmed the first bounty choccie bar ads - the western end is far more private. Interested? Call the Bahamas Tourist Board on 01483 448 900)

Long Beach, Perhentian Islands, Malaysia

Best For: Unspoilt Gobsmacking Beauty

What you'll find: It may have been an elephantine drug intake that inspired Belinda Carlisle's Heaven Is A Place On Earth - but the quivery-voiced rock diva obviously never saw this wondrous archipelago. Just try going back to Blighty's rain-lashed concrete after Long Beach: a glistening idyll of endless, tippex-white sans, luscious palm fronds and crystal azure waters teaming with sea turtles and rare sharks. It's truly unspoilt; any electricity comes from generators while littering of any kind, fishing and even touching the abundant coral is outlawed within two nautical miles. Consequently, beer-based frolics are largely redundant; instead, entertainment comprises of lolling in hammocks, gazing at deepest red sunsets and realising that, truly, there is no art but nature's.

Who'll be there: Thanks to their marine park status, these fair isles are solely smattered with beardy nature-loving travellers and open-mouthed people suddenly realising just how ugly everywhere else in the world is.

When to go: Most hostels close between November and February. Cheaper rooms - especially at the Moonlight Hostel (006 010 982 8135), from a laughable £2 a night - fill up fast in summer, but it can experience fresh-water shortages. Call the Malaysian Tourist Board on 020 7930 7932

What the travel agent won't tell you: Basic PADI diving courses cost just over £100 - probably the cheapest in the world. Also overlooked are the island's thick jungles - harbouring awesome lizards up to 2m long.

How to get there: Flights into the Malaysian capital Kuala Lumpur start fro m £381 (call Trailfinders on 020 7938 3939). Island ferries from Kuala Besut port cost about £6 return. Get the 10am ferry to grab the best rooms.

Try also:  Tarimbang, Sumba (a 1km walk through thick forest leads to this Indonesian idyll's wide reefs and towering cliffs. Call the Indonesian Tourist Board on 020 7423 9454, or Sumba direct on 006 238 721 108); Boat Harbour Beach, Tasmania (this ex-19th Century port remains one of the state's wild ocean beaches - although the waters can be cold. Phone the Australian Tourist Commission on 020 8780 2227, or "Tassie" direct on 006 103 6442 4143), or Hat Phra Nang, Krabi (near the set of The Beach lies Thailand's best kept secret - ringed by cliffs and hidden lagoons, and only reachable by boat. Call the Thai Tourist Office on 020 7499 7679 or Krabi direct on 006 675 612 740).

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