THE END TIMES - Volume 2 Issue 2 || Letter to Editor Capitalizes Candy!

THE END TIMES VOLUME II \|\| ISSUE 2 \|\| APRIL 9, 2005

Optical Intercourse Next Great Sin! Lifestyle Contract: Going Out on a Limb? Relief for North Hall "The Darkness" Named JBU's New Official Band! Business Center Actually Nuclear Testing Facility! Vampires Take a Bite Out of Campus Life! Letter to Editor Capitalizes Candy! Dating Banned at John Brown! To The Little Man END TIMES HOME	Letter to Editor Capitalizes Candy! In light of the recent changes, additions, subtractions-whatever-to the upcoming catalog, it has come to our attention that the school's top brass has failed to consider what the students really want. So, what do we want? We want CANDY. Not just candy, but good candy, and a good candy major. We would call it "Candy Science and Arts." Sample classes would include: CDY 1003 Introduction to Candy: How is candy made? What makes good candy? CDY 2123 Foundations of Chocolate: Milk Chocolate, Dark Chocolate, White Chocolate, who cares? You'll learn about the different kinds and how to identify them while blindfolded underwater. CDY 2493 Candy History: An in-depth study of what candy was and how today's candy became established. CDY 4863 Senior Candy Capstone Evaluation: Evaluate the candies of today. From what you learn, create a new candy that will change the world forever. The purpose for the Candy Science and Arts major is for people who love candy who want to make it even better. Our major holidays revolve around candy�holidays like Valentine's Day, Easter, and Halloween! Imagine how everyone would feel if the candy they got was totally awesome and totally good! They would feel great! Frankie Granola Junior; Atkins, NY Editor's Note: The administration has been entertaining this idea for quite some time. If a degree in Candy is added, a Gateway Seminar will be formed for Fall '05. The course will primarily focus on integrating faith and Chocolatology.

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