Alias for Dummies!
Sydney: My name is Sydney Bristow� and I�m an alcaholic.
Cast: Hi Sydney.
J.J.: Syd! Wrong script! That one�s for season 10!
Sydney: Oops. Sorry J.J. (switches scripts) My name is Sydney Bristow, and I�m a secret agent. But sssh! It�s a secret!
Sloane: My name is Arvin Sloane, and I�m an evil asshole who�s posing as the head of a secret agency in my quest to hunt down some dead white guy�s moldy old stuff. (pauses) Trust me, it�s more interesting than it sounds.
Dixon: My name is Marcus Dixon, and I�m the token minority spy. Sydney likes to play me for a chump every time we work together.
Sydney: (pouts) Do not!
Marshall: My name is Marshall Flinkman. I�m the younger, nerdier, stuttering version of Q from the James Bond series.
Sydney: (grumbles) And I�m still waiting for you to install heat-seeking missiles in my Rover.
Marshall: (dumb grin) I like missiles. They go boom!
Vaughn: My name is Vaughn. I don�t have a first name any more, because no-one ever uses it. I�m the goody-goody agent of the CIA.
Weiss: My name is Weiss. I do have a first name, but I ask everyone to not use it. It makes me feel tougher.
Vaughn: Shut up, Eric.
Weiss: Wahh!
Jack: My name is Jack Bristow. I�m the sneakiest bastard in this whole pack of spy people. No-one ever seems to be able to figure out my angle, or who I really work for! Muawahaha!
Sydney: (glares) You were a terrible father to me.
Jack: Or� was I? Muawahahaa!
Will: I�m Will Tippin. I�m a journalist for some newspaper, and have a major boner for Sydney and conspiracy theories. I believe in government cover-ups, aliens, and the Easter Bunny! However, I don�t believe Sydney�s involved in any such conspiracy.
Sydney: You�re dumb.
Will: I know.
Francie: Hey, I�m Francie. I�m Sydney�s best friend, who she lies to every time she goes to work at the �bank.� I�m the token minority non-spy.
Dixon: Yay us.
Francie: You said it, brother.
Danny: �can I introduce myself now?
J.J.: Naah, I�m bored. Let�s just start the episode�
1-02: So it Begins
1-03: Parity
1-04: A Broken Heart
1-05: Doppelganger
1-06: Reckoning
1-07: Colour-Blind
1-09: Mea Culpa
1-10: Spirit