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Latest Story
Blur Area man Rich Dude really desires a customized armored vehicle. Rich went to his local luxury car dealer and requested an armored Benz with a sunroof. He regaled this august publication with the conversation he had with the vehicle dealer.. (more) War Breaks Out Between East And West Coast Christian Gangstas Dozr Early this morning, a shoot-out occured between members of rival rap groups "Thugz in Sandalz" and "Tha Bible Thumpaz". Thugz in Sandlez, who are currently the number one Christian Gangsta Rap group on the east coast, engaged west-coast rivals Tha Bible Thumpaz.. (more) Participants In War Games Take It Out For Make-Believe Real Blur A group of obsessive Counter-Strike fans recreated one of the game's most popular maps, de_dust, for real. The site is used by paintballers dressed as Counter-Strike players who battle it out over 4-5 weekends worth of paint-splattered mayhem. Manager El Hajaj said that cheating in the paintball games is rife, just as it is in Counter-Strike.. (more) Pee Wee Herman Impersonator Cuts a Hole Too Thin Cerb A Puerto Rican man, identified as Jesus el Salvador abruptly ended his career today as a Pee Wee Herman impersonator. Jesus is a local favorite for his similar characteristics to the once host of the Pee Wee Herman Show and star of Pee Wee�s Big Adventure.. (more) |
hArDSoFt Releases New Programming Language
Blur While better known as a computer games company, hArDSoFt's latest release, F#$!%, is a different direction. F#$!% is a new high performance programming language for graphics cards. CEO Bill Smith said the name was chosen from a number of suggestions given by beta testers. "They were overwhelmed with the power and simplicity of the language.. (more) New York Times In Panic Over Blair Scandal Dozr Due to a raging scandal involving one of its reporters, the subscription base of the New York Times has virtually cratered. A large number of people have cancelled their subscriptions to the publication, causing it to drop from its position as Number 2 Paper in the Country.. (more) Jockey Jorge Santana Cleared Of Wrongdoing Blur The investigation into Jorge Santana's Kentucky Derby win was spurred by an image in which he appears to wield a foreign object. Churchill Downs stewards pored over photos of the jockey and found no evidence he cheated in winning the Derby aboard Suey Cide, a racing official said on condition of anonymity.. (more) Rocko's Kiddie Corner This Edition: Safety Week! Today's Quote: "I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." - Winston Churchill
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