THE END TIMES

VOLUME II || ISSUE 3 || APRIL 20, 2005

Swamp Thing Plagues Campus!

Existance of JBU Bubble Proven!

Dogwood Festival Splintered!

Obituary:
Robert Matthew Fraser

Budget Forces Computer Downgrades!

Threefold Unmasked!

News Bites

Optical Intercourse Story Tells It Like It Is

To The Little Man

END TIMES HOME

News Bites

Dear Mr. End Times Editor:

I just want to say bravo on calling the issue of optical intercourse (aka "Eye Sex") to everyone's attention. Too often have I been grossed out walking across the quad as I encountered a couple with their gazes fixed on one another's eyes. I really wish that we could address this matter further. I mean, optical intercourse is treated so casually around here. Even I sometimes catch myself looking a guy in the eye a little too long. It's scary. But I've come up with a few ways we can combat the spread of Eye Sex on campus:

1. Wear protective sunglasses. This way you tempt no one. Just don't let them see your eyes.
2. Don't be afraid to talk about it. The Church has never been comfortable discussing this kind of stuff, but that needs to change.
3. Remember that everyone has Eye Sex. It's very common. This will make you feel better when you mess up.

Putting this in a Christian perspective always helps me. Good work on the report.

Sara Macanally, Senior

All material presented within this site Copyright 2004-2006 of the Staff of the END TIMES. All rights reserved. All offense is intended and unintentional. No matter where you go, there you are. Listen to your mother and eat your vegetables. Do not smoke if you are pregnant.

Direct all questions and concerns to Mr. End Times Editor.