"Getting to Know You"
Carcilwen Greenleaf- Her Parents are Tolkien freaks, do you not think that they would name her after Valier,
Legolas: Um, no? They'd name her Rosie or Elanor.
oh and by the way I have read the books, FYI.
ESM: (glorwen) But I STILL have no respect for canon...
Sry
Gimli: Eh?!
it took so long to update, but school comes first....
Elladan: Well, that's a definite improvement over the last author's lifestyle.
Now, on w/ the chappy!
Gimli: The only time travelling with a Sue is uneventful is when the author has run out of ideas.
Legolas and Nienna traveled together,
Elrohir: You mean, they didn't travel SEPARATELY?!
getting to know each other,
Elladan: That could get ugly.
and they came to. ahem .
Gimli: Ah! That must be where the (ahem) Elves come from!
like each other.
Legolas: I knew that comment deriding my namesake in the movie was all a false scent.
They were nearing Rivendell, when one night, Legolas decided to go for a walk,
Elladan: He did, eh? After travelling for about a month one would think he'd be glad to do something different. But noooo, he wants to go for a walk!
and told Nienna that he would be back in an hour-ish (new word ending he learned from her)
ESM: You wouldn't happen to mean "suffix", would you?
. Nienna watched until Legolas was very far away.
Elrohir: Because she had amazing Elvish eyesight now. We know, we know.
As she sat musing about random things,
ESM: Oo! Random!
she heard loud uruc-hai voices, and she swiftly grabbed all her weapons,
ESM: Which consisted of a pair of earrings and set of false nails.
and readied to fight.
ESM: (Nienna) Do you think the rouge is on right? Maybe I should use some extra eyelashes...
As the uruk-hai
Legolas: Just wondering, why are these uruk-hai so far north? I thought they stuck pretty close to Rohan.
caught notice
Elladan: Sight. They caught sight of her.
of her they sped up, thinking that it was a male elf.
Legolas: Which they had confused with the mail elf, and since the Dol Gulder Postal Service had long since been discarded due to lack of funds, they went crazy with excitement.
When the leader saw her, though, he smirked. As they got close, the leader (who's name was Oompa
Gimli: Whose.
) spoke, "What are you doing here all alone, she-elf?"
Elrohir: (Nienna) Waiting for a handsome orc like yourself to kiss me and release me from the evil spell that has left me trapped in this she-elf's body!
"What is my business, does not concern you, almighty dirty one!"
ESM: Almighty?
she lashed back at him. "Temper, temper, I think that you will make a nice partner to sleep with!"
Elrohir: ::frowns:: You're supposed to KILL her, you silly uruk-hai.
Legolas: I've always wanted a hot-tempered teddy bear, too. ::rolls eyes::
at this, Nienna spat at his face,
Elladan: And missed...forfeiting the porcelain doll he'd promised her.
and drew her sword.
Gimli: I say! What does she mean by not drawing her sword the moment she noticed uruk-hai were approaching?
"Ahh, so little girl would like to play!!!"
Legolas: Must be a fun game if it merits three exclamation points!
said Oompa and he too drew his sword.
ESM: (Nienna) Would you like a blue crayon or a pink crayon?
Before they started fighting, Nienna called Legolas' name as loud as she could,
ESM: How loud was that?
and then dove into battle.
Legolas: Shut up.
and turned around. He saw
Legolas: That Nienna wasn't dead yet and decided that the Uruk-hai were incapable of finishing her off by themselves.
uruk-hai at his campsite, and he ran to join the battle. He made his way through the uruk-hai
Gimli: (Legolas) Excuse me, coming through, look out, sorry, didn't mean to push you, watch for your toes, pardon me, clear a path...
until he came to Nienna, who was in the middle.
ESM: She still thought one of them would get around to kissing her.
The uruk-hai were almost conquered,
Elrohir: Wonder how big that party of vermin was, that two elves could disperse them.
and the last few stragglers ran away into the forest.
ESM: ::singing:: Little bunny Fufu running through the forest....::stops, noticing the others' glares:: What?
Legolas looked at Nienna, and noticed her lying on the ground;
Legolas: Um. Is she dead?
he rushed to her side
Elrohir: But it took him a few hours, as she was actually alot farther away than she seemed.
and noticed that her arm was bleeding badly.
ESM: She cut it herself.
Just then he heard a rustle of a cloak behind him. He turned around, and to his delight he saw his ranger-friend
Legolas: Aragorn!
(no not Aragorn)
Legolas: ::crushed:: Not Aragorn?
Ti standing behind him.
Gimli: Do you pronounce that Tie or Tea?
He flashed her a quick smile, and motioned for her to come to his side.
ALL: ::stare in shock::
Ti came and looked at Nienna's arm.
Elladan: (Ti, cheerily) Oh, it's fine. Here, I'd better give it a couple more cuts to avoid infection. Gangrene can be fatal, you know...Bleeding was a remedy used by doctors of previous centuries for a multitude of ills.
"Legolas get me some Athelas, it should help, oh and some warm water!"
Gimli: When did Legolas-get-me-some-Athelas join the party?
Legolas hesitated not wanting to leave Nienna's side.
Elrohir: Even Legolas(!!) was bright enough to realize Nienna was in danger with Ti around. He wanted to stick around and see the catfight.
"Quickly, man,
Gimli: Hahaha, she called Legolas(!!) a man!
before she dies!"
Elladan: (Ti, to herself) I mean, before I kill her! The blasted Sauron-cursed, Angband-puppy of an interloper!
At this Legolas sprang to his feet and came back 2 minutes later
ESM: Wow. That was...fast.
with a lot of the plat in his hands.
ESM: I wasn't aware that athelas grew in that part of Middle-Earth.
As soon as he gave the plant to Ti, he went to the fire to get some water.
ESM: ::chuckles:: That sounds funny.
When he came back, he handed the water
Gimli: In a sieve.
to Ti,
Elrohir: Ti was insulted. How DARE he suggest she needed a bath!
and she cleaned Nienna's wound with it,
ESM: Well, that and some steel wool.
she then wrapped it tightly with a clean cloth,
Elladan: Which certainly didn't come from any of her gear.
and left her to rest.
Legolas: I know what you're going to say, Elladan, and it's just too obvious to be permitted.
"Well, my friend, it seems she will live
ALL: WE ARE BITTER!
, and as for payment for my services, you
ESM: (Ti) May acknowledge to this interloper that you are indeed a married ma--er, elf. And then send her off to Rivendell alone while we go enjoy our 25th wedding anniversary, which you forgot like you forgot LAST YEAR's anniversary....
shall serve me this fine evening," Ti smiled at Legolas,
ESM: her upturned lips eloquently speaking of caviar, unusually seasoned roast chicken, peacock, asparagus, aged cheeses and exotic wines.
and he started to make something to eat, all the while thinking,
Elrohir: (Legolas(!!), thinking) Must...not...burn....peacock...must...not...burn...peacock...
'And I'm supposed to be stuck up!'
Elladan: Really? Now where do you suppose he got that idea?
Ti ended up riding with Legolas and Nienna to Rivendell,
Legolas: Which was the only kind of anniversary present Legolas(!!) was inclined to give Ti while Nienna was so obviously available.
and luckily,
Elladan: ::with relief:: He hadn't given her Rivendell!
they didn't encounter any more uruk-hai.
ESM: ::yawns:: Point for using the word "encounter".
Nienna marveled at the beauty of Rivendell,
ESM: Another point for "marveled".
and she was very happy when she got to meet Arwen, who was one of her favorite characters in the book.
ESM: What, don't you think she was a bit whiny?
The thing that she was looking forward to most, though, was the council of Elrond.
Elladan: Oh yeah, that little party where Ada told all the stories I've heard a million times.
Which according to Legolas was set for three days from the current day (Thursday).
Gimli: Sentence fragment alert.
Before the council, though, Nienna was free to explore Rivendell,
Elrohir: Afterwards she would, of course, be forced against her will to go on the Quest.
and she had a hell of a time doing it
ESM: What with all the fiery pits that were scattered throughout the Last Homely House.
. She made lots of friends,
Legolas: Oh, Miss Popular, is she?
and even danced at the ball that Arwen held the night before the council.
ESM: ::feigning shock:: No. Freaking. Way. Dance at Arwen's ball?!
At the ball, Nienna saw Ti (who she became good friends with
Elladan: Oi, do you think we could have been mistaken about that whole wedding thing?
) having a blast,
ESM: A mint chocolate chip one, from Baskin-Robbins.
and she even saw her dance with a few drool worthy elves (not as much as Lego, though)
Elrohir: Lego danced with more drool worthy elves than Ti? That's just wrong.
. Nienna danced once or twice before
Gimli: Eight separate elves challenged her to a duel for asking them to dance.
Legolas came up to her. "Lle merna salk?" Legolas asked. Nienna smiled and said,
ESM: (Nienna) Can you say "moose" three times fast while swimming underwater?
"Diola lle, quel ernil!" The two danced the rest of the night together and they never seemed to part.
Legolas: Uhm. Yes, if they're dancing together all night they would not seem to part.
They both wore huge smiles,
ESM: I honestly think there must be a gift shop in Rivendell that specializes in artificial attachable facial expressions.
and seemed very happy.
Elladan: Except, they weren't. It was all on account of the superglue.
After the festivities were over,
Gimli: They sent the hobbits to bed at midnight, if that's what you mean. The humans refused to leave till three.
Legolas led Nienna to a small river that ran through Rivendell.
ALL: ::gasp::
They both sat on the bank
Elrohir: ::chanting fervently:: Push her push her push her...
and looked up to the stars. Eventually, they realized that it was very late,
ESM: After lunch in fact.
and they both drifted off to their rooms.
ESM: ::musing:: I'm a Tolkien freak, generally speaking, but I'm thinking of marrying an Englishman and naming my firstborn son "Pursey".
ESM: ::smirks:: That isn't saying much.
Chapter 3-
The next few weeks were uneventful.
ESM: ::coughs::
Legolas: What's it like?
Gimli: ::shrugging:: Never been there.
Elladan: ::groans::
ESM: (Nienna, thinking) I wonder how long a rope made of Legolas(!!)'s hair would be. Perhaps it could be useful for catching a wild pony somewhere around here, because after all I can't go home to my pet elephant beetle without a pony...
Elrohir: What if she meant notice?
Elladan: Look, don't make this harder than it has to be. She MEANT caught sight.
Elrohir: If you say so, o omniscient one! ::shakes head::
ESM: I'm sure his brother's name was Loompa.
Legolas: When did he do that?
Elrohir: ::wisely:: She was waiting for the spell to be broken.
Elladan: (Oompa) Pink! I'm a blonde Uruk-hai!
Gimli: It made about as much noise as a snail.
Legolas: Since Oompa had already cut off her head.
Legolas heard his name being called (nice ears, eh?)
Elladan: I don't know why you keep taking so much offense, Legolas. She's talking about your cousin.
Elladan: Maybe being so far from home had a disheartening effect on them.
Elrohir: Ah, maybe.
Gimli: Wanna bet?
ESM: ::laughs::
Elladan: He's trying to break the news to you gently, but I'll spare you. She was mortally wounded.
Gimli: Wanna bet?
Elladan: Wha...no! I wasn't finished yet! Even though she was mortally wounded, the officiations of Legolas, and to a lesser extent Ada and Gandalf, would lead to a complete convalescence.
Legolas: Anyone have a handkerchief they never want to see again? 'Cos I'm going to cry.
ESM: Sure, I have one I used when I went camping last year.
Legolas: ::disgusted:: All right, never mind.
Legolas: With a fork.
Elladan: ::shakes head::
Elrohir: That's what she said.
Elladan: Of COURSE it's not Aragorn. We are talking about Legolas(!!) here, not you.
Legolas: Or Tih?
Legolas: ::wets lips and attempts to speak, but fails::
Gimli: ::in a whisper:: Her?
Elrohir: It's...it's...another...
ESM: MARY SUE!!!! ::pauses:: Which leads me to wonder whether Legolas(!!) has a secret girlfriend...
ESM: Just now, I think.
Legolas: How remarkably funny, Gimli.
Gimli: Somehow I don't feel like MSTing anymore. Nobody appreciates me anyway.
Elrohir: Angband-puppy? I've not heard that one before.
Elladan: Yeah, I just made it up just now.
Legolas: Betchya he had an old bunch of it in his pack and just disappeared to get away from Ti's pungent, rangerly body odors for a couple minutes.
Elrohir: ::smiles indulgently::
ESM: ::suddenly breaks into hysterical giggles:: Did he just ask the fire for some water? In a buckeeet pleeeazze?
Gimli: Oh no.
Legolas: ::runs for the door, where he left the duct tape::
Elladan: ::looks accusingly at Elrohir:: What did you do this time, brother?
Elrohir: Me?! Nothing!
ESM: ::relaxes before Legolas has quite gotten back to his seat:: What an entertaining story this is. Legolas, why are you out of your seat? Better get back quick, before SHE turns on the magnetic forcefield again.
OTHERS: ::mutter::
Gimli: For Ti was a true ranger, and disdained the old saw, "Cleanliness is next to godliness."
Gimli: Not to mention overused.
Elladan: ::somewhat sulkily:: Eh, go fishing, Dwarf.
Gimli: ::cheerily:: You wound me to the quick, Elladan!
Legolas: And what does it have to do with the plot?
ESM: Er, I think the author is trying to say Ti is stuck up.
Gimli: What say she DOESN'T insult our intelligence with such a gimic, and instead writes a scene that conveys the same message?
Elladan: He gave her Rivendell?! That's MINE!
Legolas: No, no, no. He let her ride with them.
Gimli: What do you mean, Rivendell's YOURS? Your father lost it to me in a poker game!
TWINS: ......
Legolas: ::carelessly:: He won it back at chess, though.
Elrohir: I do.
ESM: It's not Thursday.
Elladan: Heh, does it matter in this sun-forsaken theater?
ESM: Not really, no.
Elladan: They were going to force her to carry Isildur's Bane, too, but they decided that during a temper tantrum she might lose it and wisely refrained.
Gimli: Depends on what she calls alot. Essie here calls two friends "alot".
Legolas: This is true.
ESM: No. They probably just wanted to get to know each other well so they'd have a good idea of the best place to begin new offensives.
Legolas: Hey, enough with the commercials.
ESM: What?
Gimli: Who's Lego?
Elladan: ::frowns:: Maybe he's a...hobbit...
Legolas: Ti had a difficult time convincing them Nienna was, in fact a female, although one with very bad manners.
Elves: ::stare at Essie wryly::
Gimli: ::chuckles and settles back into his recliner::
Elrohir: ::to himself:: Artificial, one, attachable, two, facial, three.
ESM: ::scornfully:: I was quite aware of that, Ro.
Elrohir: ::shrugs::
Legolas: Is he...would he really drown her?