| Well it seems that Harry is the center of all the action when they are in a game of Quidditch and the ball is trying to kill him. After repeated attempts you start wanting it to end him then and there. Soon Harry catches some flying thing and his friend Hermione zaps the ball to high heaven. After the game is over they find a boy with a camera and he is petrified. Well about then I was shaking my head in pure awe as to where this movie was going. Well Harry and his two friends Ron and Hermione make this potion that requires the hair of someone. When consumed they take the form of the person whom the hair was taken. When two kids got knocked out by paralyzing cupcakes HAHA. Sorry, they take the form of them. They were friends of none other than Draco Malfoy, the pecker, I mean evil character in the movie. Harry suspects him of knowing about the evil that is running around. Well it turns out that he doesnt know and they return to find their friend Hermione turned into a cat. She had taken cats hair off of a grils jacket. HAHA no, hardly amuzing. As we move along more and more people are getting petrified. There is a stupid ghost in the girls lavatory named Moaning Myrtle. She told Harry that some book fell through her head. Harry took the book and it was the Diary of Tom Riddle. He flipped through it and all the pages were blank. When Harry started to write in it, the diary started answering all his questions about the Chamber of Secrets. It told him it could show him where the chamber was. It showed him a flashback when the evil was first released. Harry saw Hagrid and he thought Hagrid was guilty of releasing the evil over 50 years ago. So he took off to Hagrids house using his dads cloak that makes him invisible. Harry and Ron showed up to Hagrids house when there was a knock at the door. It was Head master Dumbledore. Soon after, Lucious Malfoy came into the house with twelve signatures to make Dumbledore step down, and for the arrest of Hagrid. Hagrid speaks out loud for the boys to hear. He said to follow the spiders. Ron and Harry follow the spiders into a forest. They went inside a cave to find a huge spider. It knows Hagrid and tells them that hagrid was wrongfully accused and never opened the Chamber of Secrets. But after it gives them all the info it wants them dead. While being chased out of the cave, out of nowhere comes the magical car tattered and torn cruising in and lands right next to them. Now how in the hell am I suppose to explain that? I dont understand it myself. They of course make it out of there, I mean I swear that they were going to kill the main character yet alone the name sake of the movie and center for sales around the world. Come on I wasnt even close to on the edge of my seat. Out of food and drink I was getting restless, and bored. Anyway they return to find their friend Hermione petrified. She ripped a page out of the diary and Harry found it inside her frozen hand. LIKE NO ONE ELSE SAW IT! It said that the monster came in through the pipes. It also said spiders fear it and anyone who makes eye contact with it will die. They wondered how all the people were just petrified. Well it turns out that none of them really made eye contact. The boy with the camera saw it through the picture, the cat saw the reflection of it in water on the ground, and Hermione saw it through a mirror she was carrying to keep herself safe from sure death. Now tell me this, if you were holding a camera and you saw an evil creature would you stand there and take a picture. No, that kid would have been wide eyed and dead. But even the whole concept sucked ass, trying to keep everyone alive. It turned out only one person died from the creature. As Harry and Ron are running through the halls they hear that Ron's sister Ginny had been taken and would die in the tunnels. They heard the people reading the blood message on the way to the girls lavatory to talk to Moaning Myrtle. Harry and Ron find Myrtle and that she is the one who died from making eye contact with the creature. She tells them that she saw it come up from the sinks. She saw yellow eyes, and then bam she was toast. Harry finds a snake on one of the sinks. He was sure then that there was the sink that it came through. He uses the snake language, Slytherin and the sinks lift up to reveal a tunnel. After stopping Guilderoy from running away from the school they make him go down the tunnels first. They all slide down the tunnels and fall into a room with bones. They proceeded forward and found snake skins. The fake Guilderoy stole Ron's wand and tried using magic on him. The broken wand back fired and he got sent into a rock wall causing a rock fall. The rocks separated Harry from Ron and Guilderoy. Guilderoy lost his memory from the spell. Harry turned to see a long hallway surrounded by huge snake heads. By now you know its a snake unless you havnt got eyes, keep that in mind. Well Harry finds Tom Riddle and he is evil. Lying on the ground is Ginny. Tom Riddle says that the weaker she gets the stronger he gets. He is none other than Lord Voldemort himself. He walks up to a huge head and starts speaking Slytherin. The mouth of the head opens and out comes the snake. It was the most predictable scene in the movie. I even translated it while he was saying it. I said mouth open, it was hilarious. Out of no where Dumbledore's pheonix comes flying in. Out of Harry's sideveiw he could see the pheonix and the snake fighting. The pheonix did all the work and ridded the snake of its most valuable weapon, its eyes. And the idiot Voldemort said that its okay the snake could still hear him. Snakes have no ears. They use thier tongue to sense vibration in the ground. Well it flicked its tongue once, nice work. Thanks guys. The pheonix dropped a bag and Harry saw a sword coming out of it. He grabbed it and scaled the huge head to get a better shot at the snake. When it went to bite him he stabbed the snake right through the top of its mouth through its brain. REAL ORIGINAL. And not to mention the snake died so slow. IT WAS IN THE BRAIN, INSTANT DEATH. oh well, I was just glad it was almost over. When Harry stabbed the snake its tooth broke off in harry's arm and poisoned him. He stumbled over to Ginny's petrified body and found the diary in her hands. Voldemort said he controlled Ginny through the diary and he would soon be human again. He said he was a memory. What in the hell was he doing on screen in reality. That I will never know. Well Harry grabbed the broken tooth and stabbed the diary. It was actually bleeding. It was killing Voldemort. He was living through the god damn book. And well before Harry died the pheonix came over to him and its tears cured the wound. Apparently the pheonix's tears have healing powers. Why didnt the damn pheonix do all the work. The movie was at its end and Dumbledore stayed Headmaster and Hagrid was released. All who were petrified retruned to normal from the potions made by Madam Pomfrey and Professor Sprout. Hermione gave Harry a huge hug and shafted Ron with a hand shake. It turned out that Harry had contracted some of Voldemorts powers during their fight and in order for the sword to appear he had to have alot of Voldemorts power in him. Along with the pheonix, Harry had to show alot of loyalty to Dumbledore for the pheonix to help. This movie was nothing short of predictable and has been laid to rest in my bad movies list. Have a great Harry Potterless day. |
