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| RWW | NSW | NEW | EWA | NEWEST | LOST | COMMENTARIES | QUOTES |
rww:
THE BOY TELLS A STORY
(The scene opens up inside a hallway of a school. We see PSI-Stu, The Boy, MC Tommy Dee
and Damon Gest waiting around. They are all wearing black RWW shirts.)
HELLINGS-
"Guys, I don't know if this is such a good idea."
STUPAC-
"Oh come on, dude, it'll be fun!"
DAMON GEST-
"Yeah, this is going to be greaterific!"
HELLINGS-
"I hate kids. And quite frankly, they hate me."
STUPAC-
"I'm sure they don't."
HELLINGS-
"Yes they do! I know it, you know it, the whole damn world knows it!"
STUPAC-
"Well then, FACE YOUR FEARS!"
HELLINGS-
"I hate you."
MC TOMMY DEE-
"Don't worry, the kids will probably love you, once they hear Big E has been going around to schools too. I mean, who would you rather see? PSI or Big E?"
HELLINGS-
"True, but I just think this whole reading to kids program totally, totally....I mean, when I think of this idea I think, I think....uh..."
DAMON GEST-
"Sucksasaurus?"
HELLINGS-
"Yeah, exactly!"
(Suddenly Michael Cole walks up to them.)
COLE-
"Sorry I'm late guys. Let's go in."
(Cole and PSI enter the kindegarten classroom. The teacher, Miss Smith, walks over to them to shake
their hands.)
MISS SMITH-
"Thank you for coming. I know the children will love it!"
COLE-
"It's our pleasure."
HELLINGS-(Sarcastic)
"Yeah, I couldn't sleep last night I was so excited."
DAMON GEST-
"We're honoredappotamus that we get to readorama to all the kidsapalooza here today-o'clock, Miss Smitharammalammadingdong!"
MISS SMITH-
"I don't want him reading to the children. He is going to teach them poor grammar habbits."
DAMON GEST-
"Whatopoly?"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"You heard the lady, Damon, you're gonna have to leave. (Tommy leads a dejected Damon Gest out of the room and closes the door. Damon just stares through
the window.) Now that he's gone, how about I show you a couple of wrestling holds?"
MISS SMITH-
"Don't touch me."
(Miss Smith walks over to The Boy, leaving Dee behind.)
MC TOMMY DEE-(To Michael Cole)
"They all they say that at first, but then once they realise that MC stands for Mega Cute, they all come crawling back."
COLE-
"I thought it stood for MasterCore?"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"You just don't get it do you?"
MISS SMITH-
"Well now, I picked out the book I want you to read, it is a class favorite. (She pulls out the book.) 'Horton Hears a Whoo' by Dr. Seuss!"
HELLINGS-
"Yeah, that's cute. Really. But the thing is, I kinda wrote my own story that I wanted to read to the kids. I'm sure they'll love it a lot more than, uh...
Harry Listens to The Who or whatever it was. Trust me, I'm The Boy."
MISS SMITH-
"Well, I suppose it can't hurt."
HELLINGS-
"Thank you."
STUPAC-
"Dude this SO rules! We get to read our story! Sweet!"
(Stu and The Boy exchange high fives.)
MC TOMMY DEE-
"Hey, Miss Smith, if we stay the whole day do we get uh....a little NAP time too? Huh? How about? (In a bad impression of
Ash from 'Army of Darkness') Gimme some sugar, baby! "
(Miss Smith smiles and then knees Dee in the groin.)
STUPAC-
"Hey Tommy, don't show pain-that's not the MasterCore way!"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"Eat me."
MISS SMITH-
"Alright class! Everybody come and sit down! We are honored to have with us today a few wrestlers from
Rampage World Wrestling and they will be reading a special story to you. So, I ask for Scott Hellings
to come up to the front now."
HELLINGS-
"Uh, hi kids. I'm The Boy, but you probably knew that."
KID #1-
"No."
HELLINGS-
"Yeah, but only because your parents can't afford television, I'm sure."
KID #1-
"We have TV."
HELLINGS-
"Whatever. Anyway, I'm gonna read you all a special story, doesn't that sound like fun? (The kids are
completely silent.) Yeah, well I'm gonna do it anyway, so deal with it."
STUPAC-
"Right on! Stories so most definitely RULE!"
(Stu, Tommy and Cole all sit down on the carpet in front of Hellings with all of the students. The Boy sits down and begins
reading.)
HELLINGS-
"Once upon a time there was an evil, evil man. /
This man made people sick all across the land. /
With no talent, and all that whining he did /
It made you wish you were watching...Sycho Sid!?! /
A virus was spread to each person and thing. /
People felt sick, if he just got in a ring.
This is the tale of this evil man and all the things he's done /
It's the tale of PSI and all the things we've won. /
The tale of our army and our fight with the sickness /
And how we're gonna take care of unfinished business. /
So sit right back, and we'll tell you how we're gonna win. /
Now sit still, shut up, hope you peed, it's about to begin.
Now it was on the night of the devil, when things went awry. /
Things were good, I had joined Gamble and briefly left PSI. /
My match that night with Stu was furious, he just would not stop. /
And then he went and hit me with that deadly atomic drop! /
Well, the match had been won and I had just made my alliance /
And then this Mercy guy just shows up, in utter defiance. /
With McMahon by his side, he was given a title shot. /
How did Mercy even get in the building? I was shocked! /
The match actually took place, and Mercy got an upset win. /
But how could Stu fight back, after the match he had just been in? /
We were all so utterly shocked, our whole world came asunder! /
But only 'cause Mercy was on pay per view! What a blunder!
Now Stu did get his rematch not long after /
He beat him so bad, we broke out in laughter. /
Once again the title was back in our camp /
But Mercy still claims he wants a piece of The Champ. /
He and some friends vowed to take us out /
But such a thing happening, I highly doubt!
Mercy's allies are nothing, we'll be here for years /
And soon, oh so soon, they'll all Face Their Fears! /
They could not, will not beat us-we have a guy like Rob Van Dam /
I do not like him, but he's no damn I AM! /
Still, I feel as though I should quickly desribe for you his friends /
And hopefully after that, we'll never have to speak of them again!
There is Sid, he runs around, claiming he's the master and ruler of the world, /
But everytime he faces us, we make him cry like a little girl! /
He has the Sycho Bomb, he uses it all the time. /
I suppose it was good, twenty-seven years ago, back in his prime. /
He claims to be psychotic, he claims to be insane, /
But we all know he's just a no-talent bum who's now quite mundane.
There's also Chris Jerichom the man I most hate /
And come this Friday, my wins over him will be 3,248. /
Y2J dissappeared after losing the tag title with Page /
And he thought he could come back and have me in a cage. /
One day I'm sure he'll learn, taking me on is something he'll regret /
And the beating I'll give him, he'll never....eeeever forget!
Now there are these other two guys you might have seen /
Too Tuff and K Dogg, the most brutal tag team! /
They like to get rowdy and talk about being hardcore every day /
They've been here for months and I still can't figure out what they're trying to say! /
They used to hang around Stu, until a month back /
He realised how much they suck, left the Playaz, and now he's on the right track!"
STUPAC-
"I don't know what I was thinking hanging around those guys! (Looks over at the kid beside him.) Are you eating glue?"
KID #2-
"Yeah, it tastes good."
STUPAC-
"You know, this is exactly how Too Tuff got started! You don't want to end up like Too Tuff now do you?"
KID #2-
"No."
STUPAC-
"Good, now give me the glue."
HELLINGS-
"There's also the man they just call Big 'E'< /
Who talks about his Hardcore Belt constantly! /
He calls himself the Hardcore Icon, what a bore. /
We all know they only true style is MasterCore! /
He'll try to take us on, but only face defeat, /
Because he's just some letter who helps present 'Sesamee Street!'
Big E has a friend, he's called The Commish /
He's a jerk, but that's 'cause he's British! /
Tired of PSI with the tag belts, he took a stand. /
He booked us a match-against each other, not a smart plan. /
Now Lancey thinks at Retaliation he can beat me, I hope he jests! /
Because we all know I am The Boy and that means I am The Best!
Now these are the men who will try to beat us, but only fail /
That, above all else, is the message of this tale. /
PSI will win, the evil man with The Sickness and his friends cannot win /
They'll take us on, but everytime we'll get the pin! /
For we need no plan, we have what they don't: talent, it's true. /
The Sickness will be gone, I'll feel better and so will you.
So take my word, PSI will win the day, and come out on top. /
Mercy and his friends must learn we cannot be stopped. /
See what Mercy doesn't understand, is that he made a mistake. /
And, no I'm not talking about marrying Pammy, with those breasts that are so fake! /
No, he made a mistake in choosing his friends /
They just aren't as good as we, and that is why PSI and The Army will win in...
The End
STUPAC-
"That was brilliant dude! Worthy of an Academy Award!"
COLE-
"Academy Awards are given for acting, not literature."
STUPAC-
"It's all the same."
MISS SMITH-
"Well, that was......interesting. Thank you for coming by. I think."
HELLINGS-
"Well just remember, The Sickness is not your friend, kids."
MC TOMMY DEE-
"And Miss Smith, if you ever feel a little under the weather and want me to take a look at you...."
MISS SMITH-
"Please leave. Now!"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"Alright, alright. (Dee hands her one of two children's walkie talkies.) Call me. Frequency 2."
MISS SMITH-
"GO!"
(They head back outside where Damon is standing.)
DAMON GEST-
"Dude-opolises, I so wish I was insideatopia with you guys!"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"I don't know, there wasn't much action going on in there. Unfortunately"
HELLINGS-
"Hey Stu, what are you eating? Is that glue?"
STUPAC-
"NO! (Looks around nervously)Don't be so stupid! I, uh......don't look at me!"
HELLINGS-
"I hate you. (Looks around.) Hey, where's Cole?"
(The Boy and Dee peer into the classroom. Cole is getting Miss Smith's number and she gives him a little kiss on the cheek, as the children
run around, playing.)
MC TOMMY DEE-
"She would rather have Cole?!"
STUPAC-
"She must be one of those women who likes to wear the pants in the relationship. You know, kinda like with Mercy and Pammy?"
HELLINGS-
"You mean how he's (making quotation marks with his fingers) 'injured' and she has to do everything for him?"
STUPAC-
"Yeah. It's kind of a bad thing if you think about it. I mean, you just know he's gonna come back
eventually and when he does he is just gonna have one more thing to complain about!"
HELLINGS-
"Stu, that is why we are just going to have to get rid of The Sickness, as fast as we can!"
MC TOMMY DEE-
"Yeah, I guess. This totally reeks! I mean, it's Michael frikkin' Cole! What the hell does she see in him?"
STUPAC-
"Don't worry, maybe she has The Sickness."
HELLINGS-
"It wouldn't surprise me. It's quite the epidemic. Come on, let's get out of here."
MC TOMMY DEE-(Talking into the walkie talkie)
"Right, will do. Over and out."
(The four men walk off, leaving Cole behind. Fade to black.)
  
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