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:: You ::
We used to be good friends, although our feelings weren't the same I refused to be his lady cos I thought it was a game We spent some time together, had laughs and some fights too, Basically we did all the things that regular couples do My feelings were growing stronger, but one thing held me back "What would people think of us knowing of our age gap?" I'd been through it all already, and it was far harder than I thought All that lying and sneaking around, hoping not to get caught That was why I hid it all, they way I felt for Brian, Didn't know how to deal with it, and so i'd just start crying, He taught me how to appreciate, gave me plenty of good advice If only he'd been younger, I wouldn't have needed to think twice Although we kept it secret, we became an Item later on But as I expected, things started to go wrong.. I discovered something awful, each day I was feeling worse My suspicions were proved in the Pregnancy test when the result showed as a plus I remember alot of tears that day, I rushed round to his door Told him of the news I had but he didn't want to know any more I was gutted that he'd turned his back, all I wanted was a little support Instead, We both drifted apart, and I was left alone to cope Dreamt that he would change your mind, and ask me to keep the baby Didn't have alot of hope but liked knowing there was a "maybe" People soon found out, and it was through no fault of my own It made me realise what a mess I was in, it was then I felt so alone He didn't care anymore, so I broke down in tears to Mum Wasnt surprised by her reaction - "My God! What have you done?!" She begged me to have it aborted - made me see her reasons why I was against the whole idea, I didn't want my child to die Days went by and I'd told some mates, Most of them were sound But because I'd made that one mistake, I was soon talk of the town No1 seemed to realise, I wasn't the first to get it wrong Instead they hit me with harsh words, I stayed quiet all along Even at my lowest peak in life, I was stabbed deep in the back No one cared about my feelings, all they did to me was attack With all the negative words I heard, No support from the man himself I had an abortion at 7weeks - Not for ME but for everyone else.. I'll always regret the decision, and wonder how things would be If only things had been better - If he'd been there for me I lay there on the day bed, watching doctors passing by One by one the patients went through, each time I had a cry By 12, I was in the waiting room, the radio playing by my bed Wanting a bit of peace and quiet, michelle mcmanus was on instead Within seconds, I was sleeping, I remember staring at the clock Next I knew I was coming round, trying my best to talk Feeling so empty deep inside, I soon burst into tears It was over, this disaster, my mess has disappeared Somehow it didn't feel right, I was then filled with regret That feeling I'll live with all my life, never will I forget Now 3months gone and I'm coping, standing on my own 2 feet Got a job and more good friends, but its still hard to sleep For I wonder how things would be now, if things hadn't gone wrong Would we still be together, or would it not have lasted long? Now we've both both moved on though, I know he wasnt right, I was only good for his ego, his 'feelings' changed overnight, I know I'll never look back, and wish things were the same, Cos I made such a big mistake - and he was the one to blame. |
: About this Poem :
You'll be able to see what this poem is about after reading it. Its my most heartbreaking one yet.
- Site Copyright by Vickky Humphrey ::Hurt/Anger::
Why Me?
I Wish Mum Dear John Dear Diary If Only Heartbroken Angel He's F*****d Suicidal Thoughts Nobody Is Perfect More... ::Friendship::
Best Mates
Fall Out Changes Laughs A Borrowed Shoulder Patching it up Moving On Differences Growing Up Times Of Need More... ::Love::
Dear John
Never Forget Mum Died 4 Love I Lied Cant Play The Song Lost 4 Words Ask 4 a Kiss You Hardest Thing More... ::Other::
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