Background information for
new and re-enrolling students:
L’Ollonais was a real
bastard. He was known for his quaint custom of cutting people to pieces
if they wouldn’t tell his what he wanted to know (he would ‘ask’ by torturing
them, of course).
His mum was kind enough
to include this picture of her boy feeding the hungry…
Keelhauling:
A User’s Guide
an
essential and practical guide.
Shooting
Your Crew To Remind Them Who You Are
Special guest, Blackbeard,
recounts charming anecdotes from his life:
Suddenly Blackbeard cocked the pistol, blew out the candle and fired. Hands [a crew member] was hit in the knee and crippled for life. When Blackbeard was asked why he did this, he replied that if he didn’t occasionally shoot a member of his crew, they would forget who he was.
* Taken from: Die Piraten (The Pirates) *
Quandary:
Plank [walking thereof] or Marooning?
Looting
and Raping - what’s the etiquette?
You’re on the account
and there are unspoken rules - this subject tells you what they are and
when to break them.
Icky,
Repulsive and Inventive: The Creative Bastard and Pirate Torture
Special Guest: Montbars
of Languedoc.
Montbars (another
Frenchman…) will relate in a series of one-hour seminars the inspiration
behind his habit of cutting open the stomach of his victims, extracting
one end of his guts, nailing it to a post and then forcing the man to dance
to his death by beating his backside with a burning log.
Monk
Riding, Burning Brands and Whips
When
stuck on board a ship for long periods of time, your average piratical
anti-hero is left to make his (or her) own fun. Here we see the relatively
obscure pastime of 'Monk Riding' (this lost some popularity in the British
Isles after the dissolution of the monasteries, but remained in practice).
Some
other piratical pastimes included lashing prisoners to the capstan and
pelting them with broken bottles, and mocking the Admiralty Court. Apparently
there's not much to do when you're stuck on a boat.
Mock
Courts: How to tell when you’ve Had Enough
Last year, we heard
of certain Honours graduates (who shall remain nameless) who set up a mock
court, with a mock accused. These ex-students got so carried away that
they accidentally hanged the mock accused. While we here at the School
of Swashbuckling do not officially condone this kind of behaviour, we know
that proper pirates see death as a game.
Buckets,
the use of: How Not To Smack A Gunner Over the Head With One.
Guest Professor, Captain
Kidd.
Captain Kidd tells
of the time at sea when William Moore, the gunner, provoked him severely
by telling him that he (Kidd) had brought ruin to them all. Captain
Kidd, taking offence at this, picked up an iron-hooped bucket and belted
Moore over the head once. Moore was heard to say “Farewell, farewell, Captain
Kidd has given me my last.” So as not to be made a liar, Moore died the
next day.
NB. Most of the study of Piratical Violence will be purely theoretical. However, towards the end of the course, volunteers from the student body will be called upon for practical demonstrations.
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