Are you worried about your child watching "safe" shows? Do you think they should be watching shows that prepare them for the real world, and not lalaland? Well, you are not alone! Many parents have been complaining about nice shows like Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, and Barney. They don't teach children anything except for how to be good! Why don't they air wonderful shows like Poopery that teach kids not to do drugs, never let a friend drive drunk, and that friends don't let friends listen to bad music?

It has been proven by Poopery Sciences Inc. that watching so-called violent and disgusting shows such as Poopery, South Park, and Mad TV actually results in better kids. Those "nice" shows that you are letting your child watch are actually warping little Tommy's mind and turning him into a serial killer! And you know what? You're first on his kill-list!

Meanwhile, children who watch South Park curse more, it is true, but they are happier people. Look at Matt Parker and Trey Stone! They turned out a little messed up, but THEY aren't serial killers. I suggest you buy an early South Park episode (Cartman gets an anal probe, Big Gal Al's Big Gay Boat Ride) and watch Matt and Trey's testimony at the beginning of each episode. If you read the subliminal messages, you will find that such shows as South Park, Poopery, and Mad TV are wholesome for your child.

So boycott Dora the Explorer, burn your Barney tapes, and watch POOPERY POOPERY POOPERY! By the way, the lovely song you are listening to came from South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut. I did not make this song.