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| TOWNIE ATTITUDE |
| A Townie's attitude is the one feature by which you can absolutely distinguish that the person is indeed Townie. The other things, such as dress etc. are variable, but the attitude never changes. Writing a section as blatantly obvious as this may seem silly to advanced Townie spotters, but to an amateur it could prove indispensible if one wishes to attempt to replicate a Townie's attitude for themselves: Firstly, you must forget all etiquette you have learned since you were able to speak and gesture with some degree of comprehension. Also remove all knowledge of cooth. Develop some inexplicable and irrational prejudices, like homophobia, xenophobia and reverse snobbery (for all those not in the know, reverse snobbery is well....the opposite of snobbery. One with reverse snobbery must feel like them being at the 'bottom' of society is far superior to having a good education, working a day in their lives, or having aspirations-therefore reverse snobs hate everyone 'above' them-which they call 'mummy's boys/girls', 'posh twats', or just 'snobs'. If you see anyone who doesn't look like you, or just looks at you with no interest, anywhere at all, whether they be on a bus, walking past you in the street, or sitting in a cafe, feel the need to shout at them, or perhaps even 'start' on them if you are feeling particularly violent. Disrespect all authority, whether it is your parents or a policeman/woman. Feel the need to add expletives randomly into every sentence you speak, varying in crudeness depending on how drunk on cider or high on glue you are. There you have it, kids. If you have anything to add I recommend you visit the contact page :) |