FOCUS: Article on BEDWETTING and ABUSE

The House On The Hill

Thursday, June 28, 1984


There was once a tiny, soft puppy who came to live in a small insul-bricked house on the hill.  He loved to be held, and be fed warm milk.  At first, he slept a lot, and only moved around in his little bed, safe and warm.

A small newcomer to these strangers, he was not afraid, and soon got more and more curious about the people and stuff in the house on the hill. So, off he went, to explore, look around, everything was SO new! First content to see and taste, fine new teeth came which the puppy innocently used, on the furniture, the rugs, the doors, and even on the people's hands! The people weren't very happy sometimes with his biting and chewing everything up; but this wasn't puppy's only bad "habit" that would make the people unhappy and that he would get punished for.

Like all little puppies, he loved to play, a favorite to roll around in soft grass on a sunny day, or even on the carpeted living room floor. He especially liked it when the people played on the floor with him, and rubbed his belly, petted his fur. And, sometimes, they didn't even seem to mind when playfully, he bit them, forgetting that he wasn't to do that. The people seemed to like him, and he liked them. 

But, one day when he was playing, the lady-person got real mad at the little puppy. The lady's voice got so loud that it hurt the puppy's ears, and frightened the little pup, who hid under the table, far back in the corner. But, he couldn't hide from the lady, who grabbed him and pulled him out of the dark refuge. The little puppy didn't get petted and hands hurt instead of feeling nice. The lady was very mean with the puppy, saying awful things which hurt the puppy, too. He couldn't figure out what he did but she kept pointing and yelling -- mad because he had peed on the floor.
The puppy was just learning about lots of things. Sometimes, he fell asleep on the furniture, or under it, instead of going to his cozy bed. And, too, sometimes he'd forget about the special place with the papers where the lady told him to pee. Sometimes, the puppy just forgot -- or didn't care to stop playing and go find the special place. And, sometimes, times he couldn't explain, it wouldn't be his fault at all. But the lady didn't seem to know, and the man-person didn't speak. At night in his little bed, curled soundly asleep in the black-darkness, it would happen too. And, the more the lady yelled, the more he'd try to be a good puppy, but soon his little bed was so wet it had to be thrown away.

The little puppy wanted to like these tall people whose faces could look so nicely and smile, but often looked mean and frightening to the little puppy.

They didn't want to give him a new bed and told him "maybe we'll let you sleep in the bathtub." The little puppy didn't want to sleep there; it was cold and hard, unlike his little bed. But, the little puppy knew he could maybe sometime be trapped by those white enameled walls, and he'd hear the steady drip-drip of the cold water while he tried to sleep. "At least," thought the little puppy, "I can get a drink when I'm thirsty, and the man and lady people won't know." Since the little puppy wet his bed all the time, they wouldn't give him anything to drink anymore. 

Still, even though he could drink from the drip-drip, he really didn't want to be put in the cold, hard place. He tried and tried to be good. He didn't like it when the people yelled, and they yelled about everything he did, it seemed. He was a very unhappy puppy more and more. The little puppy was warned again and again about the cold, hard place with the drip-drip, and the little puppy knew he had to be good. But, still, sometimes... sometimes the puppy forgot.

Once a playful puppy, he now was scared and unhappy almost all the time. He didn't like living with these people anymore. He tried and tried to be good but....again and again, he couldn't do right. One day, the lady grabbed the little puppy and held his face on the wet place he'd made, rubbing his nose in the wet, which he didn't like! The lady-person thought this would make him stop wetting where he wasn't supposed to, but, it didn't. Time and time again, the lady held the little puppy's face against the wet, rubbing his nose side-to-side-to-side, his whole face getting wet and smelly, while the lady yelled and said awful things to him.

After awhile, the little puppy couldn't even remember the first time he tasted and smelled the wet with the help of the lady-person holding his face against the spot. And soon, his ears closed off against her hurting voice, and he learned a new trick of holding his breath, whenever he had time, before the wet was too close. And, he learned to ignore hands that hurt.

When it first started, puppy was mad as well as scared when she would rub his face all over the wet. But, then it just didn't matter to the little puppy anymore. Before, he'd be mad and scared when the lady yelled and the man-person sat in deathly silence. Puppy found he couldn't even whine or bark like at first. They kept asking hi "why, why," "why can't you..." But whys couldn't be answered about the times he "forgot," nor the times it just wasn't his fault. He couldn't even tell himself why. Little puppy grew more silent, like the man-person, and the lady-person still yelled and smashed his face into the wet. The little puppy couldn't get away, even when he hid. Sometimes, he'd try to cover the wet, but he always, and the wet place or thing, was always found. And, the little puppy didn't know what to do when the lady-person yelled while the man-person was deathly quiet.

By now the little puppy had lived with the people on the hill a little over 3 years. The lady-person then told him his name, during a time when hands hurt and his face got wet and smelly again. The little puppy was to be known as "Pee Baby" from then on. Little puppy didn't like this name at all, from the first time the lady-person called him his title, and he decided he had to leave. He wanted the people in the house on the hill to love him, like he loved them, but he knew he could just never be good enough - and could never tell why he couldn't be good. And the man-person and the little puppy were silent, and the little puppy stayed silent even when the man-person yelled too. Since the little puppy really couldn't get away, he stayed with the lady and man in the brown house on the hill. He was quiet, unhappy, never played except when he was falling asleep, and didn't think about why he couldn't explain what he could before, nor the times he couldn't explain in the first place.

And days went into years, until the once-small, brown house then became a larger white, and when the man-person and lady-person left, the little puppy could finally, really leave this place of special places and hurting hands and the mean loud-silence.

This writing "The House on The Hill"  should not be copied or duplicated, on paper or electronically, without prior permission of the author.