Me: more or less.

Nov.12, 2005 - This is a tough one. It’s tough, because I had something really heart-wrenching happen to me last night.  It was very emotional and painful and wonderful all at the same time.  And I can’t tell you about it. > My Lame Thoughts on Books that I've read >Lame Stuff I Sent to McSweeney's but haven't received a response about yet >Lame Bio >Lame People I Know >Lame Pictures >Lame Links >Sign My Lame Guestbook >View My Lame Guestbook I really want to.  I wrote something very real about it.  But I’m not going to share it here.  At least not right now. Writing is my outlet.  When something good happens to me, I write about it.  When something awful happens, I have to get the words out.  Because at the end of every day, when things tend to run together and the sharpness of memories fade, the only thing I that brings them back into focus is what I wrote about it.  I came up with something very long and personal about leaving WSAZ because I was overcome with emotion on the night before my last day, and I just had to get it out.  I got pissed off when I came down with poison ivy. So, I wrote about it. Me: More or less. - November 13, 2005 Not that there's anything wrong with Charlotte - Sept. 25, 2005 Goodbye, WSAZ - Sept. 7, 2005 Illustrating Absurdity in St. Albans - Sept. 4, 2005 (with picture) Poison Ivy, You Suck Donkey Balls - May 17, 2005 A Hockey Break-Up for Huntington - April 16, 2005 What the Hell did I Just Do? - April 10, 2005 (with pictures) Confounded by Technology - Mar. 25, 2005 Archives I put things online not because I want people to think I’m funny or a really good writer or anything.  I do it because, for one thing, I write much better than I talk.  If you know me, you know what an awful storyteller I am.  I get distracted when I talk.  Sometimes when I get to the end of a sentence, I don’t remember how I started it. But I also put things online because I want others to share in my experiences, and hopefully understand where I’m coming from.  I’m not always the easiest person to understand.  It’s not that I need a website to be the footnotes to my personal life, but I think it helps me to be a better person and show that I’m open about what I do and who I am.   I really don’t mean to sound righteous.  But that’s what this is all about. It was really easy for me to write about what happened last night, because it was very emotional for me.  I just can’t share it with you, because of promises I’ve made.  Once I take a step back, I realize that what I’ve written doesn’t just involve me, it involves some people I care about.  And maybe it’s not fair to them.  And it drives me nuts, because I want to tell everyone I know about it to maybe find out if I’m an idiot, or if I’m doing the right thing.  There has to be a line somewhere. I can’t decide whether I feel like I’m being honorable or gutless.  Maybe both are true.  I guess I just don’t want to hurt anybody. It’s taken me almst 500 words to say nothing and cause nothing but speculation, and I’m sorry.  But, I just feel like I had to say something about what happened to me, even if I’ve told you nothing.

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