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| Hello. I'm Clem. You are not. Unless you are. You may know me from the picture above this text. Althoug you will find that directly above this picture is the date and time, I hope you are clever enough to work out that I mean the picture above that, and by 'that' I mean the date and time. I have drumsticks in my mouth. 'Weird' I hear you think. Wrong again. Although you have not been wrong before. So I should say Wrong. As it happens I'm writing this, you, as it happens, are reading this. But not at the same time I'm writing this. So dudes and dudettes, you've visited my page. Unlucky. You've just signed a contract to loan me all you're money. Here you go, have it back. I'm Clem the dude-miestro who eats sodium and drinks artists. I hope you enjoy my super value site. See you later, alligator. But not you! |
| Clem-Mongers's Homepage Full of Deathlike Figurines |
| http://www.clemmie.veryweird.com ---- "A montage of dis-jointed colours." "Quote me on that" |
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| ***NEWS*** First update for a while, but the most important one. I love Jenny. New page depicting the meaning of life, and many other facts worth knowing. And the usual bollocks as well. |
| Excuse me for saying, but you live in a dingle and are a dissight to that particular dingle. Here is a poem I wrote for you personnally: To me you are an energetic, apologetic diabetic. And while being a maverick, you are also Alaric* and, therefore, a limerictic, geriatric, psychiatric. PATRICK, COME DOWN HERE THIS INSTANCE! What do you think? Good yah? *King of the Visigoths |
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| Meet my best friend: Eric the North Algerian Tortoise. Although I couldn't find any of him, I did find a rather amusing photo of a squirrel. |
| Thanks to a huge amount of other people for helping me to make this site. Including all the other strange people who feel that strangeness is left out among the non-strange. Also please do not sue, and Sue; please don't! |
| . Sign my guest book. Also don't remember that Hinnies are the offspring of a female donkey and a male horse: Less common than a mule (the offspring of a male donkey and a female horse). Why is that? Is it because 12 armadillos (or armadilli, which?) have just invaded a ranarium (a frog farm). |
| One day the nose of Jissembo woke up to the sound of a truck on the crater of mass produced cakes. This worried him as no longer were the pens of justice watching the rear bus. You may be able to tell, but this may have caused a problem if the pens were to find out about the truck. To deal with this problem, the nose, whom we shall name Namangioheadface for short, took the liberty of writing the punk rockers a letter explaining the mini skirt of Tim, and also the fact about a dog. During this he also decided at the last minute to declare his worries about the whole truck/pens problem. What a surprise it was when the keys named the nose as a cornershop. As this story is interelated with the shape, we shall combine the two elixiors to perform a leaf dance. When Namangioheadface recieved a reply from the punk rockers, explicitly proclaiming the high road of bad hair cuts to be a way of shocking a book into dust. It aslo said, and I quote, 'Dear Namangiofacehead the Nose,' this shows that the punk rockers knew his name, and the fact that he was a nose. But there was something wrong! The thing that was wrong was that Jissembo had finally played with a jigsaw puzzle, now this may sound life threatening, but I forgot to mention that he was also asking the question 'Why must I be electrifyed?' so this makes it all alright. This leads us back nicely to Namangiofacehead learning to read. And to the keys naming him a cornershop. Now as the coffee kicked in, the door fell down and the garden spurted peas onto a pile of junky-men. I hear your cry, but read on! So this leads us, again very nicely, to me saying that everything rounded itself up plesantly, but as for the illusion; nothing is real. Good night! Also look at all the litter! |
| PLEASE SEND ME IN ANY STUFF YOU THINK TO BE WEIRD, STRANGE OR DOWN RIGHT 'GOOD DAY!' TO [email protected] THIS INCLUDE PHOTOS OF ME, OR PHOTOS THAT MAY LOOK LIKE ME BECAUSE I HAVE NONE! ALSO WEIRD PHOTOS OF YOU, WEIRD STORIES FROM YOU AND ANY OTHER STUFF I MIGHT LIKE! IF I LIKE THEM AND I HAVE ROOM, I'LL PUT THEM ON MY SITE. YOU MAY EVEN GET A LINK TO YOUR SITE, SO PLEASE: I NEED HELP!!!!! [email protected] NO SPAM!! |
| REMEMBER: Think idiotically, act globally! |
| All the boxes in the top left of my sub-pages lead back to this page. If you would like to read every page, click on the 'Quotes' page using the bar at the top of this page, and when you have finished click the "next" button, located somewhere near the top of the sub-page.Continue doing this! The guestbook to found above^^^^^ |
| HOW TO NAVIGATE>>> |
