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Someone tell me who it is that appears and disappears and bites and wags all the time but never meets. Ahh yes, I remember. It's Hostler the Fostler. He'll be mad I forgot. |
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Strange Questions, Words and Facts that You'll Wish You Never Ingested into your Brain because they take up Valuable Finger Space. |
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HELP!! A masterful midget is stuck in Mine Hole Pit. Yes, the Mine Hole Pit. Come back to the homepage to save him/her/it/them/
they/he/she/me/I/
you and other pronouns. |
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Ha! You can't read what is on the opposite side of this, over the title, but you could go under, ot around it. If you can read the message, or go under, or around the title: Lucky you. |
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Can you read what this says? Cool you can now hold hands with a lampost and you are invisable. |
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If the penny drops what difference will it make to the diligent gentleman with one word in his wide vocabulary? |
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When is this magic possible if the monster never stirs and the horse always eats? |
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Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. |
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A Ducks quack doesn't echo and no-one knows why. |
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Women blink nearly twice as much as men. |
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On average, 100 people die from choking on a ball-point pen every year. |
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Only one person in two-billion will live to be 116 or older. |
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A snail can sleep for up to three years. |
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It's possible to lead a cow upstairs, but not downstairs. |
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MAPS = SPAM |
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Our eyes are the same size from birth. |
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Not one word in the English language rhymes with month, purple, silver or orange. But if your looking for something as a substitute for orange try binge, dinge, cringe, m*nge and stuff that vaguely rhymes with orange. |
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The electric chair was invented by a dentist. |
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Typewriter is the longest word that can be spelled by only using one line of a QWERTY keyboard. |
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All polar bears are left handed. |
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A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out. |
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'Creative linguist' is an oxymoron. |
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| An ostrich eye is bigger than the brain of the same ostrich. |
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| The background for this page is called 'LBOWTIES'. |
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Onymous = Not anonymous
Anonymous = Not onymous |
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Is the word NONE singular or plural? Example: There is/are NONE left.
The answer cannot be answered because the word refers neither to a single entity nor to multiple entities; it refers to a nullity. HMMM!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? |
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There are no errors on this page, except this one. |
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This sentence is false. |
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What happens when an immovable object meets an irresistable force? |
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I wish to prove to you that there exists a unicorn. To do this it obviously suffices to prove the (possibly) stronger statement that there exists an existing unicorn. (By an existing unicorn I of course mean one that exists.) Surely if there exists an existing unicorn, then there must exist a unicorn. So all I have to do is prove that an existing unicorn exists. Well, there are exactly 2 possibilities:
(1) An existing unicorn exists.
(2) An existing unicorn does not exist.
Possibility (2) is clearly contradictory: How can an existing unicorn not exist? Just as it is true that a blue unicorn is necessarily blue, an existing unicorn must necessarily be existing. |
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Which is better: Eternal happiness or a ham sandwich? It would appear that eternal happiness is better, but this is really not so! After all, nothing is better than a eternal happiness. But then again a ham sandwich is better than nothing! Therefore a ham sandwich is better than eternal happiness. |
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Fact: there are other people callled Clem. |
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"Lovin' you is so hard it's like trying to herd cats.." [K8]
"Get Off The Table, Mabel (The Two Dollars Is For The Beer)" [smrtypnts]
Ethel's in ta methyl but I love her just the same [Randy]
I love my dawg more than you and my cousin even better [F]
The cow-cow boogie has ma corns flared up, but ma heart's on fire for you [Randy]
The Child Ain't Right [F]
Ya polka me here, ya polka me there but ya just can't turn me on [Randy]
I shoulda screwed ole what's her name [F]
Cool me down Clem, I'm a heifer in heat [Randy]
Those white trash trailer blues [F]
My Pa taught me all I know; and son, I'm teaching you now [baoloa]
You can shove an umbrella up my ass, but you can't open it [F]
"My Ex is uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits." [K8]
[Anon.]
Clem Understands what you are going through, he apologises for this addition to the site and wonders what he was thinking. |
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I was attacked by a German shepherd
He had his teeth and his paws on me
I got a tear in my mohair sweater
Began to sob uncontrollably.
Lyrics by a woman named Clem Comstock, and from the Clem Comstock Appreciation Society, on a page called 'Clem Lyrics' |
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I found this picture, it is called "Clem Gets Down With his Bad Self". The link to prove it: HERE |
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In conclusion my belief is that all Clems are ether very weird, very clever, or musicians. This is not a problem, it cannot be solved since it is not a problem. My name is Clem. |
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