|
THE END TIMES VOLUME III || ISSUE 1 || OCTOBER 5, 2005 |
|
|
October 8, 2005: The Day the World Will End! True Nature of the New Business Center Revealed! New ID Cards Mark of the Beast? |
New Walkway HauntedWhile the business center may currently have the focus of attention concerning the current construction work at JBU, it is not the only bit of hard labor to be completed recently. Students and faculty have by now noticed the change by the townhouse: the dirt strewn trenches have been replaced with a smooth cement sidewalk. However, there is more than meets the eye as this "walkway" has recently been discovered to actually be a haunted labyrinth! "I was just walking back to North Hall, so I figured I'd take the most comfortable route," says junior Ben Derrick. "I must have spent forty minutes in that thing! I kept looking back, and all I could see was stairs! I was really getting worried." Three students have suffered from minor injuries, mainly exhaustion and dehydration from being trapped for hours on end. One student fatality has been reported. "Based on the autopsy, we believe that he was in there for the entire first week of classes," states head of construction Bo Burck. "He apparently gave up after a few hours and figured he might as well get some work done." Construction experts are baffled, and JBU staff are hard at work trying to find a remedy. If worse comes to worse, the sidewalk will simply have to be torn down and repaved once more funds are raised. "Oh well, says Burck. "It's not like the students aren't used to seeing incomplete construction work." |
|
All material presented within this site Copyright 2004-2006 of the Staff of the END TIMES. All rights reserved.
All offense is intended and unintentional. No matter where you go, there you are. Listen to your mother and eat
your vegetables. Do not smoke if you are pregnant. | |