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THE END TIMES VOLUME III || ISSUE 1 || OCTOBER 5, 2005 |
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October 8, 2005: The Day the World Will End! True Nature of the New Business Center Revealed! New ID Cards Mark of the Beast? |
Mayfield to be DemolishedOnce again the visionaries of JBU's master plan have shown their desire to let nothing, not even decades of tradition, stand in the path of progress. It seems as though Mayfield, that ever-loved dorm of feminine wiles, is the next target of the wrecking ball. Gone shall be the giant U-shaped maze which has proved such a conundrum to so many freshman boys, gone will be the paper thin walls allowing you to listen in on the latest gossip, and gone will be the infamous "Mayfield Bench" where so many youngsters have shared their first NCMO. Why the destruction of such a bastion of nostalgia? Simply put, the need for faculty parking at the new business center outways the desire for that old timey feeling one gets when entering the Mayfield Lobby. Not all is lost, however. "Soon," states one administrator,"there will be a brand new dorm facility to replace all the lost memories and faded photos." When asked where the current residents will live until completion of the new residence hall, the reply was simply, "Well, we've always got the steam tunnels!" |
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your vegetables. Do not smoke if you are pregnant. | |