At first, I thought nobody cared about my little page, so I always found something better to do...then I checked my stats, and I'm actually getting multiple hitz on a daily basis. I shall endeavor to update more often.

Quote of the week:
Stupidity should be painful

Feb 25, 2003
People with a suspended license have already proven they are too stupid to drive. Many like to accentuate their stupidity by continuing to drive with said suspended license. Some of these idiots get caught for doing something wrong while driving, but this moron tops them all: she put a live, injured alligator in the back seat of her car.

Distracted by its thrashing tail, she rams a mailbox and gets her car stuck in a ditch. Then she walks away from the scene of the accident.

"I had a felony in the back seat, and I just didn't know what to do." Let's start at the beginning, lady...alligators hate genuine Corynthian leather.

What shouldn't be a surprise to anyone, she also resisted arrest.

"I'm at the Stop 'N Go. I need a bambulance..."

Feb 25, 2003
North Korea has a novel idea in the event that the U.S. suddenly decides to ignore Iraq for two days to go kick their sorry asses: they'll sing.

The daily newspaper, Rodong Sinmun, said if North Korea was attacked, the country would resound to a song that had the power to fill "imperialists and enemies with mortal terror."

Oh, please...we imperialists can barely understand the words in rap songs.

Hey Kim Jong II, if you really want us to cower in fear, hire Tammy Faye Baker to do the singing...

Feb 22, 2003
This idiot was watching TV while driving with a suspended license! And you thought people talking on a cell while driving were stupid...

Dec 6, 2002
Homer once said he could kill someone for the sweet, sweet taste of beer. But he wasn't stupid enough to actually DO it...

A jury on Thursday handed a life prison sentence to a Texas man who shot and killed a longtime friend he accused of drinking the last beer in his refrigerator

If it was Budweiser, he wasted a perfectly good bullet...

Dec 5, 2002
The good townsfolk of Davenport, Iowa were upset that they had to switch to drinking good beer for a week when this dude ignored a warning sign about a low bridge, and ended up flooding the street with Budweiser when his semi rig smacked into it.

In an unrelated story, Redhook Brewery has announced they will be building hundreds more 11-foot-clearance bridges across the western U.S. for no apparent reason...

Dec 4, 2002
Some first-time offenders are lucky enough to get an opportunity to clear their criminal record. All Ernesto Valdez had to do was enroll in rehab. But he didn't have the money to pay for the program. What's a stupid criminal to do?

Well, for starters, steal the court stenographer's laptop and pawn it. But don't forget the power cord, cuz otherwise the pawn shop won't buy it, you'll have to go back to the courthouse, and then get busted stealing the cord.

But the stupid part is that this occured in Lackawanna County. Who the hell named this county, Fozzy Bear?

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