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| Q. What do Kopites use as birth control? A. Their personalities! |
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| Q. You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a Kopite! You have a gun with two bullets. Who should you shoot? A. The Kopite! Twice! |
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| Q. What's the difference between a female Kopite and a walrus? A. One's wet, smells of fish and has a moustache. The other's a walrus! |
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| A man meets a friend and sees that his friend's car is a total write-off and covered with leaves, branches, grass, dirt and blood! He asks his friend, "What's happened to your car?!" "Well," explains his friend, "I ran over Nick 'Judas' Barmby!" "OK!" says the man, "That explains to blood... but what about the leaves, branches, grass and dirt?" "Well, he tried to escape through the park!" |
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| Q. What's the difference between a Kopite and a trampoline? A. You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline! |
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| An Evertonian and a Kopite are walking along the road together. Suddenly the Evertonian says, "Ooh, look at that dead bird!" The Kopite looks skywards and says, "Where?" |
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| A man goes into Liverpool Airport and eventually goes into the departure longue waiting for his flight home to be called. All around him there are overturned tables, upturned chairs, smashed windows, flight monitors broken and crowd control barries lying on the floor! "Christ! What's happened here?" he asks one of the ground crew. "Oh yeah." he replies. "Bloody hopeless... we had the Liverpool players in here this morning filming the new Nike ad!" |
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| Four surgeons are having a coffee break. The first one says, "I like operating on accountants best because everything inside is numbered!" The second one says, "Nah, I like librarians! Everything inside them is always in alphabetical order!" The third one says, "Electricians, they're the best! Everything inside them is colour coded!" The forth one says, "I prefer operating on Liverpool Fans! They're gutless, heartless, spineless, and their heads and backsides are interchangeable!" |
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