Journal
Friday 29th March 2002
I can't quite believe how much time has passed since I last updated this website. I haven't got a good excuse. Well, I sort of do. Last week I was kinda depressed because Euan was working nights and I missed him terribly. I had a few binge sessions but I think because overall my eating habits have improved I have managed to loose nearly 2kgs in 2 weeks! That brings me up to 16lbs (1 stone 2lbs) lost!!! To say I'm happy would be an understatement... to say I'm surprised would also be an understatement. haha I haven't even been to the gym for 6 days. Had a great workout today, had a hard workout on the crossrobics machine then did some upper body weights then finished off with the exercise bike. It is an absolutely glorious day in the UK - sun is shining and it is warm enough to sit outside! Euan has booked his holidays so we are going to go to Naples in Italy in about 6 weeks and it would be brillant to have lost 2 stone by then. Would make all that walking you do when you are sightseeing so much easier. We might lie on the beach one day and I'd love to look a bit better. So, that said I am going to make sure I don't eat too much chocolate over Easter! We are going up to Scotland to see Euan's parents tomorrow and I am sure we will go somewhere lovely for dinner or lunch on Sunday.
Sunday 17th March 2002
Another lovely weekend. On Friday night Euan and I went up to visit some friends for dinner. We went out for a lovely Scottish dinner. Weird thing is that they had booked the table for 9.30pm!!! I never eat that late. Afterwards we came back and talked until late. It was really nice. We stayed the night and had a long lazy morning with a fry up. Felt terribly evil but it was so nice. Euan and then came back home and hit the town for lunch. I picked tuna streak and baked potato. I think that is half the battle - making better choices. We didn't have dinner so I don't think I did too badly on the calorie front. Euan, sweetheart, paid for me to have my hair cut. I'm really happy with it. It feels quite symbolic - I've lost nearly a stone and my body is changing and it feels right to get my hair cut too. This morning I thought I would I try on some of clothes that I haven't been able to wear because they were too tight. I can now fit into all of them. One of the skirts is a summer skirt and it may very well be too big for me to wear by the time summer comes. The thing I've noticed is that my eating is generally a lot worse on the weekend and I will work on that. I really really want to get to 120kgs which is only 2 more kilos. I now know I can do this.
Thursday 14th March 2002
I didn't make it to the gym tonight because I had a long day. I did a presentation today then had to go elsewhere for a meeting and I'm feeling quite tired. I'm going to get an early night. I weighed myself on Tuesday and I was 122kgs so another 1kg off. :-))) I'm really chuffed - that is now 5.5kgs which is very nearly my first stone off! It's actually been much easier than I thought it would be. I'm feeling really happy, more relaxed and more confident. I know the fact that I've lost some weight made me feel more confident doing the presentation today. It was in front of a room full of strangers and was nerve racking but I know I did a lot better than the last time I presented. The top I was wearing is nearly too big for me. I can't wait to start throwing clothes away! Funny thing to say but true when you weigh as much as me. I'm looking forward to going into Top Shop - I go past their shop window a lot and I always see something I like.
Monday 11th March 2002
I didn't mention that I've been asked to take on some extra HSES duties as part of my job. The HSES manager thinks I can do a good job which is nice to know. I do still rely on others to give me my self worth. It felt good to get back to recording my food and choosing the right things to eat today. Euan and I did a big shop tonight and I now have a bag full of healthy food to take to work and put in my drawer to snack on. Missed going to the gym though so I'm going to make up for it during the rest of the week. Still feeling a little tender in the muscles under my butt from doing squats so it's probably not the end of the world.
Sunday 10th March 2002
Opppps. I haven't written for close to a week! I don't really have any good excuse so I wont try and make one. I have had an okay week. Weighed on Thursday and I was still 123kgs but I'm not disappointed. My engagement ring is much looser - it actually fits on my middle finger now! I wasn't expecting to see results like that until I had lost a lot more weight. Euan and I went to Bletchley Park yesterday which was where the Brits did their code breaking during the war. It's a great day out so if anyone gets a chance to go I'd highly recommend it. Today was Mother's day and we went into London to meet Euan's folks for lunch at the Chesterfield hotel. Had a huge lunch which was delicious and I'm sure was terribly evil. About the only redeeming feature was that I left my chips! I haven't been using WLR much this week but I'm getting back into using it tonmorrow and I'm going to get back to eating the right foods. I know I feel so much better in myself now that I have lost a bit of weight and I know I'll feel even better when I've lost some more. I know I can do this so I've just got to focus.
Tuesday 5th March 2002
Went out for Indian last night. I fully meant to stick to my diet but ended up eating more than I really should have. Oh well, only live once. Today I was tired and busy. I tried going to the gym but just felt tired and a little out of it so I came home. I'm having a really early night tonight and seeting the alarm for a very luxurious 7am!
Sunday 3rd March 2002
I had a nice day today - went to the National Wedding Show to get some ideas. The only downside was that Euan couldn't join me because he was sleeping as he is on night shift at the moment. I'm so excited about our wedding day. :-) I can't wait to be Euan's wife. I saw the most gorgeous dress today. Red velvet with stunning beading on the front and back. It was nearly what I wanted and as they make to order I might get them to make it. Then again maybe not. hehe I now have a pile of new brochures and magazines to flick through. I had my make up done at the Estee Lauder stand and the lady doing my make up realised how happy and excited I was which was really nice. I went on my own so it was nice to share my happiness with someone. Before I went to the show I got to the gym and did a weights workout and a bit of CV. I made some very nice seafood penne for dinner - low fat and low calorie. I'm feeling really buzzy, relaxed and happy. My life is getting better. I am starting to feel more confident. A new job has come up at work as a Supply Analyst and I'm looking at applying for it. It's more of an accounting role though and it might be a bit boring for me. Thing is that it would give me some experience with accounting and some of the IT systems we use at work that I hadn't used yet. It would also help me to understand more about the business and I do want to be a career woman. I know that losing weight will make me more confident and able to "go for it". It's also a grade increase on the job I have at the moment and if all else fails it is a possible bargining point to talk to my boss. I'm going to ring my folks soon. I haven't told them about this website or indeed the fact that I am dieting and exercising. I want this to be my achievement not my mum's. I don't really like talking to my mum about this sort of thing because she tends to start lecturing and that's not what I need.
Saturday 2nd March 2002
Woohoo... I had an excellent workout today. I did the cycling class then I went to the gym to do some sit-ups (where DID I get the extra energy!). I ran into one of the instructors who got me to do some more including some using one of those inflatable balls. That is a wierd feeling! I won't say the cycling is getting easier because that's not really right but I am feeling better doing it, not quite so out of breath and I can tell my legs are getting much stronger. It feels so nice to be feeling strong. I'm going to the gym again tomorrow to do a weights workout. Had the yummiest lunch today. Grilled tuna steak with cajun spices served with onions and mushrooms done in the frying pan with a few squirts of One cal spray and a dash of soy sauce. That was so delicious and good for me. I'm trying to make a concious effort to eat more fruit and vegetables. I have a huge mango for breakfast tomorrow. Lucky me... I recorded So Graham Norton last night and I couldn't believe it when I put it on tonight and my fav heart throb Orlando Bloom was on! hehe I must be getting too old for crushes on actors but who cares. LOL
Friday 1st March 2002
Quite a good day overall. It was nice to have a break from the gym tonight. I must admit I did have some popcorn. When I was growing up we used to have friday night treats and because Euan wasn't home I had a treat. It was soooooo yummy. I ate it really slowly and savoured it. I was thrilled to put my trousers on today and find they are definately looser around my waist and hips. I read a very scary article on Low Carb diets today. It really is a very bad way to lose weight. The best way to lose weight is a balanced low fat, low calorie diet.