HSBC (Away) - Tuesday, 24 June 2003
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Midsummer's Day. (Also known as St. John's Day. Apparently it's very big in Estonia. They light bonfires and jump over them for good luck. Not such good luck if you mistime your jump and end up with second-degree burns in the crotch region. You'd say, "bugger this for a comic song". If you were still capable of saying anything. But enough of daft Baltic traditions.) Anyway, the omens were not good. We had lost the toss against a strong HSBC side (lacking Ian Dyer, admittedly, but bolstered by the inclusion in their ranks of one Neil Holmes, to be known for the duration of this article as "Splitter" Holmes.) They had chosen to bat on a good Pagham wicket: with the outfield scorched by weeks of remarkably hot weather, and with the Loafers temporarily a man down (Antony Eastwood delayed in traffic) and, just as ominously, fielding what was in theory one of their weaker bowling lineups of the season (well, it doesn't help that two of your main bowlers will shortly be opening the attack for the opposition), a score of 150 plus looked in the offing. And given recent form, we might well wind up chasing 180. In short, if you were an HSBC batsman, you'd think that here was an excellent opportunity of improving your batting average: if you were a Loafers bowlers, you'd make like Penfold in Dangermouse, go "Ooh, crikey, chief!" and look for the nearest place to hide. Steve King's first over did little to dispel this impression, as the fifth ball was smashed contemptuously over the legside boundary for six. However, Lee Russell produced a lifter in the next over which the six-hitting batsman edged to Nick Pennicott at slip. Ten for one, and with Mr Eastwood strolling across to square leg we now had eleven fielders. Unfortunately, this was to be the Loafers' only success for some time, as the batsmen took advantage of the fast outfield by hammering at least one boundary an over, so that the run rate was ticking along nicely at around six an over. Enter the spin twins, Gary McDougal and Nick Pennicott, who proceeded to pin down the opposition, tight bowling combining with excellent fielding: the two went for just 30 runs off their eight overs, picking up five wickets between them. Top marks in the field must go to Trevor Almack, who stooped casually - nah, make it nonchalantly, even, it was that cool - for a one handed catch at mid-wicket mere inches off the deck, and that one was travelling. With occasional bowlers Windsor Holden and Alec Wallsgrove into the attack, "Splitter" Holmes (Boo! Hiss!) managed to raise the run rate slightly with a brisk 25, but wickets continued to tumble at the other end, with McDougal and Dave Burford picking up smart catches at mid wicket and mid off respectively off Holden. So despite the fireworks from "Splitter" (Boo!), HSBC had failed to muster anything like the total originally envisaged, but had still posted a respectable 109 for eight. Would this be within the reach of the Loafers? The left/right hand opening partnership of Eastwood and Burford was soon split by "Splitter" (Hiss!) when Burford departed with a duck's egg against his name. Eastwood soon followed when "Splitter" (jeers, catcalls, etc) shattered his stumps, and when the usually dependable Wallsgrove departed almost immediately the Loafers were three down for less than twenty. Enter The Almack. Having taken a few balls to play himself our northern Loafer was soon unfurling a sequence of glorious drives, aided and abetted by Martin Baldry. The partnership had passed forty when Baldry was out for 20, after which wickets fell at an alarming rate, as McDougall, Russell, Pennicott and Holden all departed in quick succession. Not unnaturally, this flurry of wickets had seen the required run rate climb steeply, so that when Steve King strode out to bat, twenty-three were needed from two overs. Some frenetic running from King and Almack, the latter rapidly assuming the colour of a beetroot, brought this total down to fifteen from the final over. Mr Russell opined that a couple of fours from the first two balls would make things interesting. King dispatched the first ball for a straight four to raucous applause. Second ball, and the tension is raised another notch as King repeats the shot. And suddenly we need seven from four deliveries. In some imaginary commentary box, the excitable Accrington tones of David Lloyd would be reaching orgasmic proportions: "Now then! Now then! :'Oo wants it more? 'Oo wants it more?" On some rather less imaginary bench on the square leg boundary, the Loafers were reaching delirium with cries of "G'won Steve! G'won son!" The third ball was dispatched to long leg, and a further two runs were added: five now needed off three. Ball four was swept to square leg, where a scrambling stop prevented the boundary: however, the return sailed past the stumps to cover point, and incredibly the batsmen ran four anyway. With the field brought in, King dropped his bat on one, Almack ran with the speed and purpose of a man dosed up on Ex-Lax en route for the gents', and pandemonium erupted on the Loafers' bench. Home with a ball to spare. All hail batting heroes Almack (43 not out, the highest score for a Loafer thus far this season) and King (17 not out). Celebrations and festivities were the order of the day. But no jumping over bonfires, we'll leave that to those wacky Estonians. Do you want to know more about Estonia? If you do, then visit www.vm.ee. It's got stuff on "Estonian Traditions and Society" (hello, bonfires) "Estonia and the EU", and a picture of a cornfield as well. Check it out. Did you know that there's an Estonian Kriketi Klub? Estonian cricket stuff can be found at ICC_MEMBERS/EST They'd probably give England a game, and certainly play Bangladesh off the park. Loafers won by two wickets |
Skulking Loafers Fixture List 2003
