There are generally three reasons (though there are others) that people leave Korea:

1. They fulfilled your contractual agreements
2. They made enough money
3. They become a basket-case and can't take it anymore

Some people stay for only a year. They made some money, had an interesting and possibly life-changing experience, and decided to leave. Some people (me, for example) stay on because they need the money and will go when they have saved or earned enough to pay off their debts or they just like the low income tax rates. The unfortunates are those who crack under the pressure of living here and need to leave now.

For those in the first two categories, I'll deal with you first since the same advice for leaving applies to everyone. For you sad Seouls, I mean sad souls in the third, read the first part but also the section at the end I wrote specifically for you.

Preparing to go

Shedding weight You would be amazed how much junk one person can accumulate in a year. I bought a bicycle, a VCR, a printer for my computer, and several dozen new and/or used books (the public library in Seoul won't let foreigners take books out) among a load of other junk. If I had gone back to Canada after my first contract, even getting rid of the stuff I didn't need or want to take, I still would have paid upwards of 200,000 won extra to ship it home. Most airlines have a weight limit on your baggage and are getting tighter all the time. When I came in 2001, the limit was one carry-on (with no weight limit) and two checked bags up to 70kg each. Now some airlines are limiting passengers to one checked and one carry-on with a total maximum weight of 50kg. Instead of increasing ticket prices, they are reducing the weight you can take on board. (I have a better idea! Base the ticket by the weight of the passenger. Let those 140kg pigs pay for their body weight so those of us under 80kg can pay less! Being fat is their problem, don't make it ours.) The same rule applies on return that you followed when you came to Korea: if it's replaceable, dump it. Only pack souvenirs, pictures, highly expensive items, essential clothes (What season is it back home?), and what you cannot live without. No, that copy of "JUMP!" magazine with the pretty girl on the cover does not count. Properly dispose of large items you bought Did you buy a scooter or (in one rare case of one person I knew) a car? You MUST legally dispose of it before you leave, you can't just abandon it. This isn't a TV or a treadmill you can just give away or leave out for the recyclers. Motorized vehicles have registrations that need to be taken care of. If you don't, legal repercussions could come back to haunt you. Do you really want Ottawa calling you to say, "Yeah, Seoul asked us to arrest you..."? Return what you don't own If you rented a mailbox as I suggested in part three, be sure to return the key. If you have a home internet service connection, be sure to return the parts. (Don't expect them to come get the equipment. My and others' experience with Korean internet companies is that they won't, even if they legally agreed to do it, but they will sic the law on you if you don't return the equipment.) Korean businesses, governments and other agencies expect to get everything back. Most important, in the airport as you leave, you MUST return your E-2 visa card. It is not a souvenir. DO NOT give it to your employer. If you don't give back the card at the airport, you will have to pay a fine (usually 70,000 won) before you can leave. Sharing and caring There are charities in Korea, and if you have extra clothes or food, you can give them to help the poor. If you have books you don't want to take, give them to friends rather than selling them to a used bookstore. Any furniture? If no one will buy it, take it to the corner and let others take it for their house. Your three year old cellphone with Korean text? Keep it as a novelty, or sell it. But if you dispose of it and the phone number has a number in your name, be sure to cancel it before you leave. If you leave an active number and the phone is used for illegal purposes, you could be held legally responsible even though you are in Canada. Insurance and assurance When making travel plans, do them ahead of time and double check. As stated elsewhere, Koreans tend to do things their way despite your explicit instructions. If you don't double check, you could be inconvenienced by a Korean's inattention to your needs or instructions. If you decide to buy travel insurance, do so in advance. (You are travelling, even if it is back to Canada.) Again, double check and prepare in advance. Make sure you also collect medical records from doctors you visited in Korea. (Good luck getting them once you are back in Canada.) Just as important, be sure to get a medical checkup before you travel: malaria, Hepatitis A and B, and tuberculosis are not diseases you want to be spreading in an airplane's air system or to your family and friends. Don't just pack, repack When finally packing up, don't just do it once. Be prepared to pack and repack several times. Sometimes you will find that necessities become luxuries, and luxuries become junk. Don't be afraid to throw away dead weight. If it's a past custom it might not pass Customs What you thought was a great souvenir may turn out to be a relic and is considered a cultural treasure. Such items cannot be take out of Korea, or at least not without special permission. Check with a customs officer at the airport and ask about anything you might have bought that seems suspect. Don't worry about tourist souvenirs bought at the Korean Folk Village near Suwon. I'm talking about things you bought in second hand shops or bought through less scrupulous channels. Also, certain foodstuffs are banned from import or export without approval by the Korean, Canadian, or other governments. If you buy something at the duty-free shops past the airport gate, don't worry. Food you buy at airport restaurants and carry on the flight are also no problem. But for anything else, there is a simple rule: "Active" material (fruit, milk products, meat, canned goods) are illegal to import or export without a license. If you want to take out "inactive" materials (tea, powders, dried spices, patseurized goods) most will pass without a hitch. Be safe and check anyway. It would be better to toss 100,000 won of souvenirs in the garbage at the airport than to be arrested and pay hefty fines. Korea fines people up to 5,000,000 won (C$5700) for the illegal import of certain goods. Do you have that much money to spare in your pocket or bank account? It's better to ask now before you get to the airport scanner and are detained by the police for trying to export certain items. I said visit the airport. That doesn't mean going to Inch'on, you will find English speaking customs officers at Kimpo as well which will save you the hour long trip.

For the Desperate

Have you been in Korea too long?

Some people have no business being in Korea or just aren't suited to living outside their country. They crack under the pressure, become basket cases, and decide to do a "midnight run".

(For those who don't know, I will explain: A midnight run is when someone packs up and leaves the country in the night without telling anyone.)

Whether it's the lack of creature comforts (TV, regular food, decent people), being unable to deal with the Korean mentality and the social structure, the homesickness, or whatever the reason, some people just can't take it anymore. I have seen it happen and I can empathize, but breaking the law by breaking your contract isn't smartest thing you can do.

Before you ever consider running away, examine your lifestyle:

• Are you isolating yourself?
• Does your life revolve solely around work and home?
• Do you socialize with other people very much?
• Are you drinking heavily or more than normal?
• Are you smoking more than usual, or taken it up?
• Are you being destructive? (Getting into verbal and physical fights, vandalizing property, uttering racial slurs, etc.)

Before packing and running, try getting out more. Meet new people, join a group or sports team, or anything, but do different things. Pick up copies of the free magazines (Seoul Classified and Seoul Monthly) and find things to do, read the newspapers, go to baseball games, anything to break out of your monotony. Check out my links page for places to start looking.

Everyone who I have seen do a midnight run slowly let their life collapse in on itself. They stop socializing outside of work, they gave up their hobbies and had no activites, they began drinking heavily. They ended up doing nothing but be a slave to the job, living it 24/7.

That last statement is a big part of the problem: becoming a slave. Because of the financial investment in bringing in teachers, many school directors see you as property (read Part 9, "Stick It Out" about Korean social structures) and treat you as such. Part of this is controlling and observing your movements, and this is also a big cause of people cracking. The schools and directors aren't doing themselves any favours.

Yes, observing. These people aren't dumb. If you are becoming unstable, they may suspect it and be watching you. In fact, there are several firms now operating in Korea which employ former members of the Korean military to investigate and actively spy on western teachers. These companies are legally permitted to use physical force on you, and given the Korean view of foreigners as being worth less than Koreans (especially if you were in the process of packing to run) they will not be gentle. In the Korean military superior officers can physically abuse the soldiers beneath them, and I doubt they would hesitate to do it to you given their opinion of deserters. (Say the name Yoo Seung Joon to any Korean and see what sort of reaction you get.)

Now that I've scared the living hell out of you, will running away do any good? No. What would happen if you tried and got caught? Think about the consequences:

If you get caught:

• potential violence by the security companies and the police
• no assistance or protection from the Canadian embassy because you broke the law
• being forced to repay wages or the cost of your plane fare and being expelled from Korea (which could affect future travel to other countries)
• your personal possessions being lost (Do you really think the police or the government care if your suitcases are lost or damaged?)
• worst of all, being forced to stay and fulfill the terms of your contract with people watching you 24/7 and no one trusting you, plus forfeiting your bonus or being fired without notice

And even if you do get away:

• you unfairly inconvenienced your employer and co-workers
• you would lose any remaining salary and contractual bonus
• any friends you might have had on the job and stayed in contact in the future won't
• you may lose your ability to travel to other countries, and not just Korea once their government talks to yours
• Canada Customs and Revenue could hit you up for income taxes upon your return
• potential legal problems in the future

Now you're even more depressed. But there is a solution: talking, and there are plenty of people you can talk to and get support from.

Find a co-worker at the school you can trust, someone who has been there a long time but is not loyal to the school, a lame-duck teacher about to finish his or her contract. Sound out people like them for advice, they have nothing to lose.

If you dare not trust any co-workers, talk to a teacher at another school or on the internet. There are literally thousands of us, and I'm not the only one willing to give advice. If you want to write to me personally, visit my Feedback page.

Have you ever talked to your recruiter and told him you are unhappy? Some will actually help, although a rare few might inform the school. If you are worried that the recruiter might tell the school, use a free email account and speak generally to sound him out.

There's another good reason to contact your recruiter. Since 2003, more schools have been demanding recruiters offer financial guarantees. If the teacher runs away, the recruiter has to pay back the fee and sometimes other expenses. If your recruiter signed this sort of agreement, it will be in his interest to help you.

Have you contacted a lawyer? There are several in Korea who speak English and can help. The Canadian embassy keeps a list of lawyers for those in legal trouble. The embassy is in contact with other Canadians in the country and could give you the phone numbers of support groups.

How about calling the Korean immigration office? They have a legal duty to answer questions, to tell you your rights and your obligations under Korean law. You may find out that your employer is lying to you and is violating the law. If this is the source of the problem, don't be afraid to use the law when it is on your side.

As I said, be honest. Because honesty about your unhappiness is the most important part. If you are honest and talk to your employer, he or she might be a civilized person and give you a way out.

For most employers, it is the recruiting fee, the cost of airfare and the need to replace you immediately that is the big problem, not your month-to-month salary. If you can wait until a new teacher arrives and either have the money to pay for your own return ticket home or have completed at least six months of your contract, the employer may be willing to give you the return part of your ticket in forfeiture of your bonus.

Telling the truth could well be the solution. Breaking down crying in front of the director could show how serious it is. Most importantly, if you don't ask the question, the answer is always "No". The school's owner or director may not be happy about you wanting to leave and is thinking more about the money than about you, but they are not inhuman.

Additionally, if a family member dies, many employers provide one funeral leave per year. If such a misfortune happened, you could use this as an opportunity to leave permanently. You might have to leave some of your possessions behind, but it's better than losing your sanity. (But DO NOT lie about a death in the family. Again, they are not stupid and they can check.)

So what if these things don't apply to you? What if you've only been here a few weeks or months and you broke down immediately? Again, talk to everyone, your employer, the embassy, support groups. Ask your family if they will pay for your return ticket. Don't just cave in and run, look for solutions. Even if it means working until the end of the month and that month's salary paying for the return fare, and returning home broke, it's better than being in legal trouble.

But no matter your situation, I will never recommend a "midnight run". The risks aren't worth it, and benefits are few. If you give your employer the chance to solve the problem and find a replacement, you may not leave happy and the director may not be happy, but you can at least get out without a legal albatross around your neck.

Last but most important: If you are thinking about suicide, get help now. Being stuck in Korea is not lowest emotional depth a person can reach. Find someone to talk to, anyone, even me. Never commit a permanent and rash act in response to a temporary problem.

Nothing is worth killing yourself over especially because you are not the only person affected. Think about your family and friends at home. How will they feel never knowing what drove you to it? (Do you really think a suicide note will explain anything?) What about people who depend on you, and I don't just mean your employer and co-workers?

Life is too precious to respont with a knee-jerk reaction to a bad situation. With the exception of "life without parole", there is always a solution and always hope.