| Pan潘建銘 | |||
| For English see below | |||
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潘建銘 1999/2/11 我真的不記得何時聽到"耶穌"這個名字。以前，即使有人提耶穌的這個名字，也不會在意去注意這個名字。即使在求學的時代，有同學去教會，也不會想要去認識祂，那時候只在乎某位女孩是誰？某位女星是誰？ 一直到１９８１年因工作及體質的關係，眼睛常感到不舒服，總覺得眼睛裡有個白點，這個白點讓我看不見東西，每次看直線時總是有斷層，且每二、三星期，眼球裡常會產生許多的白點（俗稱飛蚊症），自己就開始緊張而跑到臺大醫院去檢查，醫生說，此病很麻煩，心裡的不安、與惶恐開始產生，怎麼辦？怎麼辦？如果眼睛出狀況，要怎麼過日子？那時候的我，由於前幾年很努力地工作，加以尚未結婚，所以手上有一些積蓄，除了現金以外，還有不動產，我開始花錢找醫生醫治我的眼睛，並四處打聽台灣最好的眼科醫生及醫院，我不怕花大錢，找大牌名醫，只求這些大牌名醫救救我的眼睛，我不想在黑暗中過日子，我的惶恐沒人能體會，那時候的我常常三更半夜在惡夢中驚醒，夢見我瞎了四處流浪，惶恐的心甚至到最後常晚上不敢關燈睡覺，只怕一覺醒來人已瞎；就這樣南來北往（坐飛機）醫治了近一年，並無明顯起色，看不見的地方，還是看不見。 這段期間，我也開始看了很多關於眼疾的書，對自己這方面的疾病也有點認知。但是最後仍由醫師告知，此病是何病名，並言無藥可醫，只能加以控制，不再惡化，就是三生有幸了，治療經過一年，那時候的情況，只有比以前未治療更糟糕，看不見之處增加了好幾個，且每次水晶體混濁讓我行動很不方便就連走路都無法看得很清楚，工作上，就更別提了。更不幸的是，有一天在一家大醫院有一位年輕的住院醫師，也隨著在主治醫師之後，看了我的病，看了以後，無意中說出我的病很難治療，並說，他知道幾位有同樣的疾病的患者，三年或四年眼睛瞎了。哇！這一句話使我整個心沉、沉、沉…沉到極點。我無法形容那時候的心境，只覺得腳步好沉重，好沉重，我覺得我的人生完了，只剩下二、三年；我無心在工作，奮鬥的心也滅了，我開始把我的不動產便宜的賣掉，開始遊蕩，過著今朝有酒今朝醉的生活。我一個人到處晃，我不知道我的人生航向哪裡。我只想到一件事，眼睛瞎了，人生就結束了。但神的愛，我想那時就開始運作了，毫無目標的生活過了一陣子之後，我想到了神，人不能，神可以救我。那個時候，我開始了求神的日子，到處去寺廟，求神問卜，從台北行天宮、北港的朝天宮、台南、高雄的各大廟寺都少不了我的足跡，只要有人提起或帶路，都不落鉤（台語—錯過的意思），所以我很體會那些得重症病危人死馬當活馬醫的心境，江湖術士、中西藥、邪靈通通一試，只望神蹟出現，能苟活一些生命。我自信我很有信心，我很有祝福。我的福氣，我覺得來自我所受的高等教育。這種日子過一陣子以後，我就細心的察看我的生活、我的心靈、我的身體仍然不安寧，仍然覺得沒盼望，且那些祭拜儀式，我很不欣賞，不合乎科學，也覺得無知，所以，我遠離了這些寺廟及道壇。我仍然繼續的尋找真神，真正帶領我離開罪惡，並給予我平安的神，就這樣繼續的追尋（那時候的我是無業遊民）。說也奇妙，就在我老家住處附近，有一天突然來了一位香港牧師（他叫許保羅。現人在哪裡，我不知道）成立了一個教會（取名叫高雄教會）。他用招開英文班，吸引外邦人到教會聚會，許多人因此而來作禮拜唱詩歌讚美神，而我就被那平和的歌聲吸引進去，和其他人一起作禮拜，另外一個理由，我想我也該認識這位神∼主耶穌基督！ 說也奇妙，從我進教會以後，我覺得心很平安，不再惶恐，大部分的人上這個教會是為了學英文，但我志不在學英文。我真的是想找神醫治我的病，我在我家附近的這個教會高雄教會聚會一年多，我終於確認這個耶穌基督是真神，祂可以救我們脫離罪惡，祂告訴祂的子女，把一切重擔交託給祂，生命在祂，感謝主！我找到了，也得救了，我的眼睛從發病到現在已經１７年了，還在用，還在工作，看書，看報，神的恩典，只能說大而奇妙。祈望世人都能來歸主，享受在世的平安喜樂，未來的永生。阿們！ 約翰福音１：１∼４ 太初有道，道與神同在，道就是神。這道太初與神同在。萬物是藉著他造的；凡被造的，沒有一樣不是藉著他造的。生命在他裏頭，這生命就是人的光。 約翰福音１：１４ 道成了肉身，住在我們中間，充充滿滿地有恩典有真理。我們也見過他的榮光，正是父獨生子的榮光。 馬太福音５：１４∼１６ 你們是世上的光。城造在山上是不能隱藏的。人點燈，不放在斗底下，是放在燈臺上，就照亮一家的人。你們的光也當這樣照在人前，叫他們看見你們的好行為，便將榮耀歸給你們在天上的父。 Pan Jian Ming I really don't remember when I heard the name “Jesus” for the first time. In the past, even when some people mentioned this name, I wouldn't notice. Even back when I was in school, I never thought about getting to know Jesus. I just was interested in knowing, “I wonder what that girl's name is,” or “Who's that movie starlet?” Until 1981—because of my work and my physical constitution, my eyes started to feel uncomfortable. I always felt that my eyes had little white spots that kept me from seeing things. Every time I looked directly at anything, it was always out of focus. Every two or three weeks, little white dots would appear (we call them “flying mosquitoes”) and I would get nervous and run to the large Taiwan University Hospital to check them out. The doctor would say these were caused by emotional, nervous, or stress-related reasons. What was I to do? If my eyes had a problem, how would I live from day to day? At that time, because I had worked very hard for a number of years and hadn’t gotten married yet, I had quite a bit of money saved up and even some real estate. I started to spend money to find a doctor that could heal my eyes, asking around to find the best ophthalmologists and hospitals in Taiwan. I wasn’t afraid of spending big money to find big-name doctors; I just wanted these doctors to save my eyes. I didn’t want to spend my life in darkness! I don’t think that anyone understood my distress. I would often wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare where I saw myself wandering around as a blind man. I was so distressed I would wake up blind, that many nights I couldn’t sleep unless I left a light on. For a whole year I flew from one end of Taiwan to the other trying to heal my sight, but it made no difference. What I hadn't been able to see, I still couldn't see. During this time I read a lot of books about eye problems and became quite familiar with my condition. But in the end, the doctor informed me what the name of the condition was, and that there is no medicine for it. I could only hope to control it so that it wouldn’t worsen, or I could hope for a miracle. But after a year under the doctors’ care, my eyesight was only worse. The spots where I couldn’t see things had increased in number, and when the lenses would cloud up, I couldn’t see clearly enough even to walk. Of course, you can tell it was impossible to go to work this way. What was worse, one day at a hospital, a young resident following behind the doctor in charge saw my condition and inadvertently commented that my condition was hard to heal and continued that he knew a few people with the same problem who in three or four years’ time were blind! This comment made my heart sink extremely low. I couldn’t describe how I felt at that time. I just felt that my steps were very heavy, extremely heavy. I felt that my life was over and had just two or three years left. I had no desire to work; and my drive was gone. I started to sell off my assets very cheaply and to start to play around, living a life of drunkenness. I started just drifting around various places not having any direction to my life. I thought only about one thing—if I’m blind, my life is over. But I think it was then that God’s love started working. After I lived an aimless life for a while, I thought about the gods. Although impossible for man, the gods might save me. At that time I started to choose auspicious days, going to temples, visiting augurs. I went to Taipei’s Xing Tian temple and to Beigang’s Chao Tian Temple, and major temples in Tainan and Kaohsiug. If someone mentioned one, or took me there, I didn't miss it. So I started to feel what terminally ill people feel like. I felt like I was trying to heal a dead horse. I went went to quacks, pharmacists, spiritists, hoping for a miracle so I could live a little longer. In the past, I had thought my self-confidence had come because I was very fortunate. I thought my good fortune had come from my high level of education. After passing through days like this, I carefully examined my life. My heart and body were not at peace and I still felt hopeless. I didn't like those traditional worship ceremonies. They weren’t scientific and were ignorant. So, I stayed away from those temples. I kept searching for the true God, the God who could truly bring me out of sin and give me peace. All during this time that I was unemployed, I kept searching. It was quite amazing--one day right near my hometown, I ran into a pastor from Hong Kong, and where he is now, I don’t know. He had started a church and taught English classes to attract non-Christians to services. As a result, quite a number of people came to the services to sing hymns, and I was drawn by that peaceful singing to worship together with the other people. I also had another reason, I figured I ought to come to know this God—Jesus Christ! It was amazing, from the time I began going to church, my heart felt at peace. I wasn't distressed anymore. Although most people at this church studied English, I didn't want to. I wanted to ask God to heal my condition. After I went to this church nearby my house over a year, I finally was sure Jesus Christ was the true God. He can save me from sin and can tell his children to hand all their problems over to Him and live in Him. Thank the Lord! I found this answer and was saved. My eyes have bothered me for seventeen years. I’m still using them, working, reading books, and reading the newspaper. I can only say that God’s grace is matchless! I hope everyone can come to the Lord and enjoy peace, joy, and eternal life. John 1:1-4 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life; and the life was the light of men. Mt. 5:14-16 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. |
May Wei 魏家芝 | 
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| John Ji 紀克方 | |||
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| Lydia Hu胡麗娟 | |||
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| 曾柏銘Bobby Zeng | |||
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| Tom Liu 劉俊良 | |||
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| Wang王光傑 | |||
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| Connie Fang房秋平 | |||