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...:: cosmic debris ::...
12-29-2003
MUD PUD PAUL: you dont no what a g00d time is till
you slam your dick in a door
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12-27-2003
I am not feeling particularly creative tonight, so I don't have anything funny to say.
I did however find a funny email my friend Jimmy-Jimmy sent me awhile back, and I have
decided to post it here.
Hope you all like it. All 5 of you.
Of all the times i've farted, and all the times i've pooted, nothing compares to the time
i shit my fuckin pants. Shittin ur pants is an art form, not everyone can make the shit run
down their leg right down their shoe and out of their pants. Sure you get shit all over
your leg, but who cares? The point is it's good shit and it smells like a champ. The legs are
lucky to have such an excrement run down them ya know? I'm blabbling I'm sorry, it's just
that shit makes me feel like a million bucks. Well, see ya later, keep shittin those fuckin
pants son.
12-23-2003
I added a new feature again today, a working AOL punter.
Click the link and read all about it.
Also, if anybody knows the newest way to send clickable hyperlinks in AOL chatrooms, please
email it to me so I can add that too.
Dear Dad:
Today at work they had some free food and they had milk and I drank a bunch and got sick.
I get sick sometimes when I don't take my medication and I drink too much milk or get stressed out.
So anyway, we don't have garbage cans at our registers, just cardboard boxes.
I grabbed it and puked and the lady I was ringing out said "oh that's so gross."
And I said "Yeah I think I swallowed a toe nail."
Isn't that a good story??? I laugh every time I play it back in my mind so I just keep playing it and playing it and I laugh and laugh and I feel warm and tingly in my heart and my peepee.
Okay that's all I wanted to say. I just wanted to share this story with another living being because it is just so KEWLIEZ!!!!!!! Please forward this email to 20 people do not break the chain thanks.
Love,
Josh
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Merry Christmas fools. Oh yeah, my friend said she'd link me if I
linked her.
12-21-2003
Do you ever take off your jeans and sniff the ass or crotch? I do. Every hour.
Be sure to read the all-new and/or improved article DELISTING AOL CHATROOMS
if you use AOL.
Uh oh...
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Take the Dante's Inferno Test
12-15-2003
i can't remember my legs
12-07-2003
I don't have much time so I'm just going to eat a Ricola and bounce a TV off my head.
12-04-2003
Like 88 bazillion other people I downloaded the Paris Hilton sex tape off of KaZaA and can I just
say... Who wants to see some dude porking a skeleton. It's all black and white
and grainy too, it looks like it is from the 1940's... you could say it was an amateur skin flick made in
Auschwitz and people would believe it.
I am working on a java applet that makes my index page smell like punkin pie. I love that smell
I saved a slice from Thanksgiving and every time I sniff it I get the most ginormous boner, if
you looked at my crotch you'd think I was half-man half-black.
FACT of the DAY: If you have a wart on your hand and masturbate you will
get genital warts.
TIP of the DAY: Don't hide the bodies in the crawlspace because that's the first place they'll
look.
QUOTE of the DAY:
"Life is a funny thing. You have to appreciate the good times when you have
them, and constantly prepare to destroy the white devil"
12-03-2003
In addition to being a snappy dresser, Kleenexes is one hardcore ingenius kid and
here is the proof.
His band isn't half bad either, you should totally ask mommy to
buy you the new SSION CD for Christmas or Chhanukkkahhhh or whatever Holy Day you are
celebrating on this planet or whole wide earth.
I was looking through some boxes of crap today and found printouts I made back in 2000 of some stuff I posted
in Yahoo! Clubs I was moderating that caused me to get investigated by the Secret Service and
kicked out of college. I blame it all on the fact that I was huffing ridiculous amounts of ether
and sniffing world record-breaking quantities of ketamine at the time. If that makes you think
less of me you should also know that your tax dollars paid for it all.
I might just sit down one of these days, edit out all the illegal, anti-semitic, and self-incriminating
stuff and post a few gems here. I guess it's sick that I still consider some of what I said
humorous despite the fact that it totally ruined the life I was living at the time.
Better get back to downloading Joy Division songs and making offensive AOL chatrooms. I'll post
again soon and next time, I'll try and think about what I am going to say before I actually
start typing.
"this script is so hot it could make Janet Reno open up a paint can with her ding dong."
- quote from RealUltimatePower.net
12-01-2003
Okay I felt the need to add something or update or whatever because it's just been so long, so here is something. I am so excited I might diarrhea my pants and eat it and squish the corns all up in my grill and teeth. You know what I mean. Nevin is the gayest.
OnlineHost: *** You are in "Life - my pee pee is huge". ***
Media244: hi
Media244: i had to say hello
Neck Neck Inc: sup fool
Media244: who the heck calls his cock a pee pee
Neck Neck Inc: hey watch it i am just 9 years old
Neck Neck Inc: but hung like a 6-foot-tall negro linebacker
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That's all for now. This page will be updated irregularly.
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