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The Dark Age Buffy: I'm aerobicising! I must have a beat! Giles: Wonderful. You work on your muscle tone while my brain dribbles out of my ears. Xander: Giles lived for school. He's actually still bitter that there are only twelve grades. Buffy: He probably sat in math class thinking, 'There should be more math. This could be mathier.' Willow: C'mon, you don't think he ever got restless as a kid? Buffy: Are you kidding? His diapers were tweed. Buffy: Have I ever let you down? Giles: Do you want me to answer that, or shall I just glare? Jenny: I'm lying, Rupert. The book's fine.Ijust love to see you squirm. Giles: ( relieved) Yes, well, I, uh... trust I gave good... squirm. Jenny: Did anyone ever tell you you're kind of a fuddy-duddy? Giles: Nobody ever seems to tell me anything else. Jenny: Did anyone ever tell you you're kind of a sexy fuddy-duddy? Giles: Well, no. Actually that, that part usually gets left out. (smiles) I c-can't imagine why. Xander: Y'know, computers are on the way out. I think paper's gonna make a big comeback. Willow: And the abacus. Xander: Yeah, you know, you don't see enough abaci. Buffy: That's okay. I'm not much into running. Ethan: Aren't we manly? Cordelia: Do you know what you need, Xander, besides a year's supply of acne cream? A brain. Ethan: Well, I hate to mutilate and run, but... Xander: Uh, I think that Ethan guy disappeared again. Buffy: Darn. I really wanted to hit him till he bled. Giles: Bay City Rollers. Now, that's music. Buffy: I didn't hear that. What's My Line, Part 1 Buffy: Do I like shrubs? Xander: That's between you and your god. Buffy: What'd you put? Willow: I came down on the side of shrubs. Dalton: Well, I'm not sure. It could be, uh... (shrugs ) deprimere... ille... bubula... linter. Spike: (paging through a dictionary) Debase, the beef, canoe. Buffy: Uh, we're having this thing at school. Angel: Career week? Buffy: How did you know? Angel: I lurk. Angel: Yeah. I'll never be a kid. Buffy: Okay, then a regular kid and her cradle robbing, creature-of- the-night boyfriend. Dalton: What about the Slayer? She almost blew the whole thing for us. She's trouble. Spike: You *don't* say? Trouble?! (paceing) She's the gnat in my ear! The gristle in my teeth! She's the bloody thorn in my BLOODY SIDE! Dalton: Uh, yes, but... The Order of Taraka, I mean... isn't that overkill? Spike: No, I think it's just enough kill Giles: It was written by Du Lac. Damn it! I let it slip my mind with all the excitement. Buffy: I'm guessing it wasn't a 'Taste of the Vatican' cookbook. Buffy: These assassins, why are they after me? Willow: 'Cause you're the scourge of the underworld? Buffy: I haven't been that scourgey lately. Giles: Don't warn the tadpoles? Willow: (groggy) I... I have frog fear. Cordelia: I can't even believe you. You dragged me out of bed for a ride? What am I, mass transportation? Xander: That's what a lot of the guys say, but it's just locker room talk. I wouldn't pay it any mind. What's My Line, Part 2 Willy: What are you gonna do with him anyway? Spike: I'm thinkin' maybe dinner and a movie. I don't want to rush into anything. I've been hurt, you know. Willow: There's a Slayer handbook? Buffy: Wait. Handbook? What handbook? How come I don't have a handbook? Willow: Is there a T-shirt, too? ..... 'Cause that would be cool.. Xander: Who sponsored career day today? The British Soccer Fan Association? Kendra: Did anyone explain to you what 'secret identity' means? Buffy: Nope. Must be in the handbook. Right after the chapter on personality removal. Giles: Is everything alright? Buffy: Yeah, it's okay. Kendra killed the bad lamp. Spike: Come....Restore your most impious, murderous child! From the blood of the sire she is risen. From the blood of the sire, she shall rise again. Right, then! Now we just let them come to a simmering boil, and remove to a low flame. Kendra: Dat's me favrit shirt! Dat's me *only* shirt! |
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