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Policy Position #2: Abortion

Funny how something that contributes nothing in one sense to the running of the country, weighs so heavily in determining who will eventually run the country. We are many things, including contrary, inconsistent, incomprehensible, but with a nice selection of restaurants. Things could be worse.

At any rate, to sum up my primary opponents on this very contentious subject, the Democraps support abortion, up to and including on demand, regardless of reason or need, and all on the public's dime. The Republican'ts oppose abortion, up to and including each and every mother's kid of it, regardless of reason or need. Interesting, since Dems support killing millions of children a year, while claiming what they do is "for the children" and opposing the death penalty, while Republican'ts -- those children starvers with their tax cuts -- oppose killing children, unless the child is approaching adulthood and has killed someone else.

As I said, contrary, inconsistent and incomprehensible.

When it comes to the moral and ethical aspects of abortion, I and the National Barking Spider Resurgence Party stand as follows: first, we don't agree that the argument about when a fetus becomes a human has been settled: James Carville, Chris Matthews, Sean Penn and Saddam Hussein have yet to make the transition convincingly. Second, we don't agree that the issue belongs in the Congress; it's a dubious issue even in the courts, particularly those wherein judges think they've been elected to legislate instead of adjudicate. It seems destined to be cyclically decided in the courts, since courts in some states think they can trump the constitution and Congress, too, depending on who appoints whom, etc.

BUT, since it is required of a candidate to grapple with things that aren't as important as the threat of global warming threatening the world's ice cream supply, here's where the National Barking Spider Resurgence Party stands:

- in support of abortion in cases of rape, incest, serious health risk to the mother, and if it's been cloned by some deceptive French broad who claims to be a scientist who believes this planet was populated by aliens eons ago.
- against partial birth abortion, except in the case of serious health risk to the mother.
- against the use of mandated taxpayer fundiing of abortions, unless the woman is unable to pay for it herself, and is a victim of the aforementioned or one of Bill Clinton's cigars.
- against the use of abortion as belated birrth control by the sexually irresponsible: in short, if you willingly helped make it and can't afford an abortion yourself, you made it, you get a job, change diapers and raise him/her to be more responsible than you were.
- against ANY federal abortion mandate, forccing a state to go against the will of the people on a matter that doesn't justify or need federal intervention.

Get over the so-called 'progressive' notion that you aren't responsible for your own actions. Get responsible, or take your 'blame everyone else but yourself' ass to France, where irresponsibility and blaming someone else is a national past time.

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