Alfs-World.tk

Chat Up Lines
Everyone has used one at somepoint in their goal for a quick lay on a friday/saturday night and these are just some ive heard and taken from the web- one or two ive used myself... wasnt the best idea in the world..54 worked for me once lol

Chat Ups
1: Excuse me, I'm new in town and I was wondering if you could give me directions to your flat?
2: Him: "If you woke up in a field with muddy hands and muddy knees, would you tell anyone?"
Her: "No/Why?"
Him: "Do you want to go camping this weekend?"
3: Hey Kitten! How about spending some of your nine lives with me?
4: My name is pinocchio, sit on my face and i'll tell you a lie.
5: I've got a gun in my trousers if you lend me those 2 bullets you have in your Bra I'll shoot my load all over you!
6: I had a dream about you last night, you owe me a set of sheets.
7: I need to take a shower, want to come?
8: your ass is as firm as a basketball. Mind if I dribble on it?
9: There's a gap in your life! Mind if I fill it!
10: Hi, i'm a qualified breast tester. (squeeze) don't mind me, just checkin the produce. Good and firm. I don't usually take my work home, but i'm gonna make an exception for you
11: Please excuse me if I appear erect. I am.
12: When you told me to fuck off was that a no?
13: Hey baby you probably don't recognize me bacause last time you saw me I wasn't wearing any clothes.
14: HI, fancy saving some water, and sharing a shower with me. It's not just for me, but for the whole nation!
15: You would look great with 150 more lbs. on you. Hey, I'm 150 lbs.
16: I want to fuck you all night long and after that you can fuck me all day long!
17: My tongues and explorer, and your my uncharted territory.
18: Could I take your picture, So that I can look at the girl of my dreams more than once, Or will you go out with me tonight?
19: Hi, I would just like you to know how great it is to meet a potential Miss World!
20: Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?
21: When I look into your eyes I see the Moon and the stars.
22: Its women like you who stop me from becomming a monk!
23: Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
24: I'm sorry, I'm an artist and it's my job to stare at beautiful women.
25: I would like to rearrange the alphabet, and put U and I together.
26: You know, you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
27: Will you be my teddy bear tonight, i left mine at home
28: I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
29: I think that you are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen... On a Wednesday!
30: I love you, what your name?
31: If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
32: Hey baby, I'm ready for some FUN, I already have the F and the N, now all I need is U!
33: Excuse me, have I fucked you yet?
34: Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!
35: Fuck me if i'm wrong, but are you Elvis?
36: They call me summer, I'm a long time cumming, but when I cum I'm HOT.
37: I'll eat you into a coma, ..... And than I'll Fuck you out of it
38: Do you want to dance? Yes! Good, go on then, so I can talk to your pretty friend!
39: My parents aren't home!
40: I'm joining the priesthood tomorrow, just one more sin?
41: I have the F the C and the K, now all I need is U, shall we?
42: Hey baby, how about a Pizza and a Fuck? ... What's up? Don't you like pizza?
43: Cold outside isn't it? (staring at her breasts)
44: I don't want to be alone when I go to bed tonight, but I do when I wake up!
45: I'm sorry were you talking to me? No! Well then, please start!
46: See this packet of condoms, they go out of date tommorow, wouldn't it be ashame to but them to waste!
47: How about a math lesson baby; we could add me and you, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply
. 48: The word of the day is "legs" Lets go back to my place and spread the word!
49: Yo. You'll do.
50: Do you have a Kleenex? I made a mess in my pants thinking about you.
51: Gesture with your finger for her to "come here"... When she get to you, ask " Do you always come when someone fingers you?"
52: I'll bet you a quarter I can kiss you deeply on the mouth without touching your lips. Passionately kiss, then pay the quarter for losing the bet. It'll probably be worth it to follow up with, I'll bet a dollar I can love you all night long...
53: Nice legs, what time do they open?
54: Be unique and different, say yes
55: (Use index finger to call someone over then say)If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.
56: Are you free tonight or will it cost me?
57: Is that a ladder in your tights? Or is it the stairway to heaven?
58: Give a rose to someone and say "I wanted to show this rose how beautiful you are".
59: Fancy a shag?
60: I forgot your name, can I just call you mine?
61: My name is ..., But you can call me anything you like. Just call me
62: Tu Voi Fa Buona Cabe? - Do you give good head?
63: Io Woi Compra tu a beua o porta Scopa? - Can I buy you a drink or shall we just shag?
64: I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you'.
65: I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.
66: Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
67: I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
68: You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
69: I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I bet I could make your BedRock
70: Your dad must be a baker, because you've got GREAT buns.
71: Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway
72: My name's.............. That's so you know what to scream.
73: Hold out two fingers and say: "Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers?" (I don't know.) "Cause they're mine sweetheart."
74: Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?
75: That dress looks real becoming on you. Of course if I was that dress I'd be coming too.
76: (Lick finger than touch girl's clothing) Let's get you out of those wet clothes.
77: Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears?(Pull your pockets inside out....) Would u like to?
78: Your legs are like peanut butter, smooth, creamy, and easy to spread.
79: I can read palms. {write your # on their hand} OOh it says your gonna call me soon!
80: Guess what?! I've got an 8" tounge and I can breath out of my ears!
81: If you were a library book, I would check you out.
82: Go up to a girl, ask her: "Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger?" She says no. Then wink.
83: Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?
84: You with all those curves, and me with no brakes!!
85: He: Do you fuck on first dates?
She: No!
He: Can I book two?
86: Wipe off your face and say "Here, I cleaned off this seat for you."
87: you remind me of a parking ticket because you have fine written all over you.
88: your name must be daisy because i want to plant you right here
89: Get your coat, you're pulled!
90: Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under