Mini-Resolutions

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(Thanks to Rain for the original idea. Forty-three resolutions is too many).

1. I shall stop getting offended at things which clearly have no relevance to me whatsoever.
2. I shall stop constantly refreshing my LiveJournal friends page just in case someone has written something in the last twenty seconds.
3. I shall return to singing lessons.
4. I shall get it into my head that chocolate is still chocolate even when nobody has seen you eat it.
5. I shall find a decent exercise DVD and actually use it.
6. I shall stop taking pictures of plates/the wall/funny shaped sticks in order to use up the film. It’s just a waste.
7. I shall severely limit the number of Simpsons episodes I can watch in a day. Eighteen is too many.
8. I shall not buy any more pads of paper or notebooks. There are at least twenty totally unused ones lying around.
9. I shall write a spell/ritual/chant/something of that kind every week. I shall perform one at least once a month.
10. I shall observe the phases of the moon.
11. I shall learn to cook roast potatoes.
12. I shall not go into town unless I need something.
13. I shall stop reading up on superstitions. It is supremely bad for me.
14. I shall not buy superfluous CDs/DVDs just because they are there.
15. I shall start keeping a paper diary again.
16. I shall not buy books on a religion I no longer practise then refuse to read them because I no longer practise it.
17. I shall stop thinking about how everyone is going to die. It is unhealthy.
18. I shall make a loose timetable and stick to it.
19. I shall stick firmly to my shopping lists.
20. I shall finish the stories I start, so they aren’t hanging around bugging me until I am eighty-six.
21. I shall not spend money on the following: candles, incense, fake flowers, unnecessary make-up, books about TV shows, books about how to do something I can already do/will never learn how to do, diet books, bad compilation CDs, CDs with only one or two good songs on them, anything that sings in an amusing fashion, very expensive magazines that are 80% adverts.
22. I shall not buy bags of salad. Buying the salad then leaving it in the fridge for a week before throwing it away does not make me any skinnier.
23. I shall realise that buying one fewer ‘bad’ item of food than ‘good’ item of food does not make it a ‘healthy’ shop.
24. I shall not suddenly decide that so-and-so hates me. So-and-so does not hate me. So-and-so is only barely aware of my existence.
25. I shall not shop on the internet, nor shall I attempt to buy myself paid diary accounts. I don’t need a paid diary account. Why would anyone need to pay for a diary account?
26. I shall not read upsetting/annoying articles, get very mad then promptly forget about them. That is rude.
27. I shall stop being unnecessarily rude.
28. I shall stop agreeing to things I don’t want to do/have no intention of doing.
29. I shall get a goddammed LIFE and stop sitting/lying around all day then wondering why I can’t sleep.
30. I shall stop making long and complicated lists which I forget about as soon as I have finished them.