Disclaimer

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT:

Now looky here my little sheeps, I mean peeps, I mean mindless followers of the cult to Dorky…Ahh to hell with it..HEY YOU WHO'S READING THIS:

For the record, MsD (Metaphysical Doctorate) is not an educational accreditation, it is an honorarium. My MsD was bought by me for me by the Universal Life Church after an arduous 3 question, 30 second, free correspondence course and a $39 testing fee.

TsD (Theophysics Doctorate) is also an honorarium; it was bestowed on me by me.

BsD (Bullshit Doctorate) is also an honorarium; it was bestowed on me by the intelligent people of the Carnie circle…I mean after all, it is important to have that one too.

Oh gosh, oh gee, I've been exposed! You see, I’m hopin’ that nones of you will bother to read or look me up on the net. As proud as I can be I’ve been listed as the who’s who…Except in there I wrote my own bio to include: Born in New Orleans, LA (luckily my guppies, I mean clients, believe me exclusively…I’ve even conned a website into believing me) but let me clear this up since in December I also wrote that I was born 1941 in Los Angeles, CA…You see LA…L.A. simple typo. I stated that I’m a son of a 33rd degree Mason…I meant a grandson, since my father didn’t practice and he’s not even recognized if you should ask the Masons. Since I state that my family had a home here in Los Angeles in the 40’s through the 50’s…I would like to retract the obvious misprint that I was raised in Point Algiers near New Orleans. I would also like to state that there was another obvious typo in that book when I stated that I have an Anthropology Degree from Georgetown University (simply because an email to and from the alumni board took care of that lie..I mean rumor that was going around) and since I am willing to now state I’m obviously not formally educated. I stated that I taught classes at the local community colleges…oops, another typo made since we ALL know that could never have happened. Colleges don’t hire students and since I didn’t have an accredited course to go to my name…well, they made a mistake. Cop…someone say cop…where….I wasn’t here..I mean, yes, I was a cop or security guard..your choice (if you saw the Pulitzer prize picture from 1974 showing me as a security guard at a discount store…than I meant security guard when I say cop.)

With those sole exceptions, I have presented myself and my clientele with the utmost sincerity (Choke). I pride myself on my integrity (Gag, choke) and my dedication to the community (Choke, cough), and I believe that my contributions and my accomplishments speak for themselves...accomplishments, I know I’ve made up a few that you can find.

However, I am of the highest opinion of myself, I mean the opinion that many people in the occult community could use a little lightening up both in their personalities and in their wallets, hence the humorous presentation of my services allowing me to blow off any lies…I mean misrepresentations that you might think you’ve read or you that you may have gotten confused with that which actually came out of my own mouth (depending on which side of my face I was showing).

It seems some people just couldn't get a joke if it beat them on the head with my magickal but angry inch.

Finally, I would like to clarify that I am not, nor have I ever been a member of the Brotherhood of the Ram nor was I ever involved in the Ram Occult Center..even though I’m about to claim stake on that name and reputation. I would also like to clear up that I may or may not have known Don Blythe, as he’s dead and you don’t know that there are other people who may or may not expose me as a liar…I mean as confused. You can’t prove it anyway.

Jerk H. "Doc" Dorky

The preceding public service announcement was brought to you by the Committee for Societal Hygiene, dedicated to exposing exploiters with muckraking mockery, wherein rests the truth. Please check this site for updates.