The D-People

The D-People

"The D-People are jerks, it's just that simple." - Pjos

Leader of the D-People and arch nemesis of Ninja Monkey Red, truly the most hated of the D-People is Incogitabilis Dominus. Possessing an otherworldly charisma, Incogitabilis can charm his victims into a submission that will persist for years, allowing him to torture them indefinitely.
Truly his maliciousness comes not from calculation or desire, but from an instinctual ability to cause pain; this makes him the most dangerous type of decepticon one can encounter, for he operates on a purely subconscious level and will continue to cause harm even when he insists (and possibly believes) that he is not doing so.

Second in command to Incogitabilis Dominus is the internationally recognized Atrox Maritus. An enemy to all Ninja Monkeys, Atrox has found his most strident foe in Ninja Monkey Blue; having once caught her off-guard in a fight and delivered several painful blows, he now tops her list of enemies.
Atrox, unlike Incogitabilis, is entirely aware of the evil acts he commits, drawing their plans with the same calculating eye of an architect, executing them with the cold viciousness of a serial killer. Imploring Atrox for mercy is a pointless endeavor, for he experiences no sense of guilt, no pangs of regret; heartless and mean, Atrox must be put down.

This member of the D-People did not readily reveal himself to the Ninja Monkeys; in fact, he was long tolerated as a non-D-Person, and it was only after careful consideration that the monkeys finally gave in and concluded that he was indeed a D-Person.
Perplexus Amator is, however, a less offensive D-Person than Incogitabilis or Atrox, having committed minorly annoying offenses that mostly resulted in unacceptable confusion of the Ninja Monkeys. Having clashed with both Ninja Monkey Red and NMB, Perplexus Amator is more to be avoided than destroyed.

    The D-People are a group of former Ninja Monkeys who, disagreeing with certain tenets of the Ninja Code of Honor, rebelled against the teachings of Ninja Monkism to band together in an attempt to prevent the Ninjas from achieving their goal of an idiot free world. The biggest threat to the Ninjas, these D-People possess Ninja-level intelligence while lacking conscience and emotion, and thus remain free to terrorize Monkeys at will, sans guilt or fear of consequence.
     The D-People reside in a secret fortress believed to be somewhere on New York's Long Island. An all-male coalition, they utilize a guerilla fighting style that includes ambushing, sneak attacks, and use of ancient torture methods previously deemed by the Ninjas to be too harsh even for the most blasphemous imbecile.
     These cretins are bent on the destruction of the Ninja Monkeys and will stop at nothing to cause them pain. They are a threat to the safety of Ninjas everywhere, and to the future intelligence and goodness of the world--and it is up to the Ninja Monkeys alone to defeat them.

"I have never met a decent D___ or D_____; bastards, every one." - David

    This week Ninja Monkey Red learned that D can also stand for Dull. Out for a reconnaissance mission at Swing 46, Yogi Monkey's latest hideaway, Ninja Monkey Red passed her time waiting for Ninja Monkey Blue by sipping beer and observing the crowd.
     It wasn't long until she was approached by a sailor (possibly this sounds too cliche to be true, but have faith--it is the gospel) who asked her for a dance. Not wanting to draw attention to herself by refusing, she accepted; the sailor seemed nice and invited her to sit at his table with a group of other sailor friends, and since NMB was taking her sweet ass time arriving, she accepted.
     It only took her moments, however, to realize the mistake; the sailors let slip that they were stationed at a base located on Long Island, and as the boring drivel oozed from their lips she began to understand: the D-People were trying to trick her again.
     Luckily, NMB arrived shortly thereafter with a group of allied supporters and together they took down the sailors, banishing them from the club and sending them howling down the street in botarded shame. Thus the new addition to the list of D-People, The US Navy.

What about the women?

It is with much sadness that we make this new addition to the D-People. Indolesco Corculum, a former Ninja Monkey candidate, has fled the solace and love of the Ninjas to join the evil clutches of the dpeople.
Training partner of Ninja Honey Monkey, Indolesco was flourishing under the teachings of Monkism until one day, during a particularly rowdy game of dodgeball, he was hit on the head with a blunt instrument and something was knocked loose. He immediately retired to his room, packed his things, and without another word set off for D-People headquarters, leaving a stunned Honey Monkey standing in the midst of the dodgeball field wondering what to do next.