It was a chilly night in 436, and the wee hours of the weekday morning were treating us well. It was chilly because we have central air conditioning, and it's pretty much always chilly in here. It was Thursday and none of us was wearing pants (which makes it especially chilly), due to the institution of "Pantless Thursdays", in which boxers of all sorts are welcome (briefs are not appreciated, and we'd prefer you wait in the hall if you insist on them). Maybe that was more than you wanted to know. Anyways, we had just decided to rearrange the room to ensure maximum comfort for the upcoming semester at UIUC. Unfortunately the new arrangements involved some sacrifices by certain roommates, and so we left it up to God to see who got first choice: we drew cards.
Maybe you noticed that Luke looks quite pleased with himself. That's because he drew the ace successfully seizing the best sub-room in the Quad. Way to go, Luke. We're all happy for you. Or just downright jealous. One of the two. You'd better watch your step, Luke. We know where you sleep.
The Room is ever undergoing transformation; by its very nature, it becomes cooler with every passing moment. Even in a state of disarray, the Room is cool and the inhabitants are even cooler; pants fear us, girls love us, and other dorm room dwellers are jealous of us. We encourage all those near and far to come behold the prodigious Room in all its glory.
