tori amos - 1,000 oceans (to venus and back)
27 Sept 2000 -
I realized today that the first few days of a deployment really aren't that hard at all. It tends to hit me after a couple of weeks. I think it's the same with many spouses. In the first few days I'm making plans for the time the boat will be out. Keeping those plans is a whole different thing, but at least I'm making the attempt. My plans this time are hiring a regular sitter for a few hours a week and hitting the gym. Taking off that baby belly flab may do me a whole world of good. Yes, I'm skinny, but it doesn't mean I can't have extra belly flab, give me a break. Every day since the first morning that Nathan was out, Celia has asked me, "Where's Daddy? Working?" And each time I tell her yes, he's working, but he's on the boat, and he'll be gone for a long time. I'm going to give her credit and assume she understands that, but in her eyes, it doesn't hurt to ask anyway.
Ok, I haven't been this tired in a long time. I spent the day cleaning after skipping my nap. Then, looking at Celia and realizing how bored she was, I got us all ready for a walk. It was dark out, so it wasn't hot, but we walked for at least an hour, the last 30 minutes all complaints from Celia. "Mom, help - rocks! Mom, I hafta go potty. Mom - my foot hurts. Mom - go to MacDonald's" Mara loved it though, I never heard a peep out of her. Good thing is, they were both in bed by 8. That never happens. So now I'm snacking on a 4,000 calorie assortment of junk food and it's just great. I'm thinking about making an attempt to visit the girl next door, but we've lived next to each other for so long, I almost feel like it's too late, I'm already the rude stuck-up neighbor. What can you do. Celia told me today that her boo-boo was a fish. Ok, am I supposed to find some inner message in that, or what? I know she doesn't really think that, but then when I was little, I thought I was once a little yellow chick. I think I'll end on that note.
Boring. boring. Did the regular errands today with the girls. Instead of suffering through trying to get Mara's stroller through very inaccessible areas (eg. post office), I was more willing to hold her and suffer a little arm pain. So arm pain suffering I did. It's amazing what you learn to do with one hand when you really have to. Saw Karena while I was out. For fear of boring her to death, I really didn't even say much. I just wasn't up to much lately. Hopefully that will change. Russ, are you available to babysit for a few hours tomorrow night? Dang, well how far away is Iceland from my house? Anyhow, I cooked a big dinner for Celia and myself. I don't know why I do that. I should be cooking for one. That girl would be full off of the crumbs I leave on my plate when I'm done. I wanted to paint our fingernails when Mara went to bed, but Celia could barely keep her eyes open. So we'll have to do that girly stuff tomorrow. I read her a book and kissed her goodnight, and told her Daddy misses her and loves her. She said, "Okay Mom" and rolled over and fell asleep.
It rained a little today. I think the rain brings out the grumpiness in my kids. I didn't have any errands to run today and the thought of trying to take a walk with two young kids in the rain wasn't very tempting. So we stayed in. I didn't really want to, I know it bores them to death. So I tried to keep them happy. I skipped a whole bunch of cleaning, which I'm slightly regretting now. I did Celia's fingernails and toenails. We pretended like we were in the salon. I told her to pick out her colors (she picked blue and sparkles) and we talked about fun stuff while I filed and painted. Besides getting a headache from the fumes, it was pretty fun. Mara whined off and on all day. She wasn't happy unless I was holding her or playing with her. But when we chased Celia around the house, she was obviously having lots of fun. I have drool trails all over to prove it. She's totally ready for stage 3 baby food now. She sucks this stuff down faster than Celia can drink chocolate milk. And she's still hungry. Celia refused to touch dinner, which really set me off. It wasn't just that, but she wanted cookies instead, and she cried and cried and cried about it. I felt bad, but I never gave in. She finally went to bed hungry and sobbing. I can't really blame her, though, they're Double Stuff Oreos. Right now I'm eating her day's share, poor girl. Good News!! It's official! We are going to Patuxent River Naval Air Station, Maryland when we leave Japan. We'd been hoping for it. We leave in June!
tori amos - winter (little earthquakes)
