The Married Life - 6
by [M]ad[C]at and Heri
Faramir goes a-cooking. Again.
The next day, Faramir wakes up earlier than his wife, and goes off to shower, thinking about what to do that day.
No idea appeared to him in the shower, and so he carries on his thinking to the dining room, getting breakfast. He was just scraping butter onto
the toast when an idea suddenly struck.
Faramir: A-ha! If Arwen's here, Aragorn must be free!
Putting the piece of toast into his mouth, he picks up the phone and dials the number. After a few pauses, a male's voice speaks.
Aragorn: Hello?
Faramir: Hey Arrers, Faz here. You free?
Aragorn: Uh... not really. Arwen's going out, so I rung up the hobbits and they told me to come over to their place to
learn how to cook properly.
Faramir: What are you, CRAZY?! The Shire's on the other end of the continent, for Eru's sake!
Aragorn: Nope, I'm not going to the Shire. Merry and Pippin got themselves a house near Edoras, don't you remember?
Faramir: Slaps head Oh... oh yeah...
Aragorn: Eowyn's inviting Arwen, right?
Faramir: Yeah.
Aragorn: Well.. maybe you could come along with me to their place.
Faramir: Oh... hmm.. okay, I guess.
Aragorn: Right. Meet me at eleven at my house. I'll prep my car.
Aragorn hangs up.
Pleased as punch, Faramir goes off to change, munching his toast. In the bedroom, Eowyn is up, and is making the bed. She notices
Faramir's change in mood.
Eowyn: Why are you happy all of a sudden?
Faramir: I've got activities, my dear. Going off to your homeland to learn how to cook!
Eowyn: Huh?
Faramir: While selecting some clothes I'm going with Aragorn to the hobbits' holiday house. They're teaching us how
to cook.
Eowyn: Oh, I see... That's good then.
She then goes off to shower as Faramir changes.
At eleven o'clock sharp, Faramir is standing in front of Aragorn's house. He rings the doorbell, and Aragorn goes to open the gate wearing only a
towel.
Aragorn: You're really early, you know that?
Faramir: Hello to you too. Looks at Aragorn You know, people might gossip if you wear this outside.
Aragorn scowls and goes back in to change. A few minutes later, he appears and drives out his Rachstiel Lancer (Made in Gondor!(TM))
. Faramir stares at the vibrant red car open-mouthed.
Aragorn: Are you going to just stand there all day, or are you coming in?
Wrenching his jaw back into position, he gets into Aragorn's car and they both drive off.
An hour later, the car arrives in the hobbits' house. As they get out of the vehicle, Aragorn and Faramir share a heated debate.
Faramir: Nope, Staplesnout the Shocking is one hell of a wrestler. I mean, look at his moves! He fell Rivethead the
Restless in just fifteen seconds!
Aragorn: I still stand by my decision: Goretooth the Great still rules the ring.
A faint voice then emanates forth, shrill and panicky.
Frodo: A Ring? There's another ring?
Aragorn: No! No, Frodo, I mean the wrestling ring. Y'know, the Reformed Orcs Wrestling Association?
Frodo: Oh.. oh okay. I thought it was.. that ring. Heh.
Faramir, Aragorn and Frodo all share a sheepish expression.
Merry: Hey, are you guys going to just stand there all day or are you coming in?
With that sentence, the two men and the hobbit goes inside, with Faramir muttering 'Whoa, deja vu.'
The house is big, even by big people standards. Merry and Sam are in the kitchen, taking out all the ingredients while Pippin makes a cocktail
punch. All of them greet each other enthusiastically, and then went into business.
Constant tutoring by the hobbits continue for over three hours.
Merry: Yeah, cut that carrot to small, tiny pieces. You don't want large chunky pieces of it in the chowder...
Sam: Faramir, you need to really massage the chicken in order to marinate it. Here, let me show you...
Aragorn: Why do I get the feeling I'm in one of those cooking shows...
Pippin: Well, you need to learn them to make your wives happy. I heard about that Mount Doom thing...
Frodo: And it's dangerous! What happens if one of you drops in?
Faramir: Oh, don't worry your head off, Frodo. We're still here in one piece. Besides, I'm not going anywhere near there
again, Eowyn would chain me onto the bedstand...
All of them laugh.
At about five in the afternoon, everything is laid out and ready for eating in the backyard.
Sam: Well, for first timers, you both did quite a good job.
Faramir: I'll say... look at my chicken! Kick ass! Woot!
Aragorn: My chowder's not bad either. Far cry from the broths I made when I was in the wilderness...
Hobbits: We know. We tried it. Goes on to make gagging sounds
Aragorn: Right, right. I'm hungry. Let's dig in!
All of them then settle down and feast on their own works.
After cleaning up and disposing the garbage, the men prepare to leave.
Men: C'ya, hobbits!
Frodo: Bye, Aragorn!
Merry: Remember the chowder recipe!
Faramir: Thanks for the help, guys. I appreciate it!
With that, the men leave for their homes, satisfied that the day was not wasted.
Chapter 1|
Chapter 2|
Chapter 3|
Chapter 4|
Chapter 5|
Current|
Chapter 7|
Chapter 8